forgive me for the three times I denied you
forgive my tears for their taste of salt
from the nights I looked back
forgive me for taking your hands
and turning them into bread
you are not to be devoured
your body never was mine
consecrated to be broken
and even if it was
what disciple am i
to be worthy of you
my love is not strong enough
to hold another lover to that cross
my soul too undeserving
but i need you to know
like you know the cracks in your ceiling
from staying up at nights
i need you to know
i will lay these palms down
lining your path
anywhere you choose to go
even if you find someone
who would rip apart the seams of heaven
to hear your prayers
even if she carries your cross
even if she washes your feet
i would part seas for you
i would spill this wine of my blood
to make you smile
i would write a new covenant
to every morning you awoke
i would give to you all the pearls
in heaven's gates
because you are my patron saint
you can sharpen me with your iron
you can refine me in the fire

i want to grow up next door from you
i want to be seven years old with you
i want to put band-aids on your
skinned knees

i want to meet you in a book store
i want to talk about poetry and art and trotsky
i want to buy you a book like i'm
buying you a drink at the bar

i want to sit next to you on the train
i want to make small talk about the weather
i want to lend you my coat and forget
to ask for it back

i want to be a field nurse
if you're a wounded soldier
i want to change your gauze
and sneak you extra meal rations

i want to be a bystander
talking you off the ledge
i want to lead you gently back into the world

i want to be careful with your heart

i want to love you softly and abiding