Why do you laugh when I say I love you?

a boy waiting patiently at the train station
he lights up a cigarette
can't smell the flowers in his hand
over the smell of petrol

i don't remember what happened
when i saw you
arms stretched, bodies entwined
happy tears, nose kisses

i never did meet you at that station
but if i did
i would still be locked in your kiss

Ex-insomniac
Has passive dreams
Yet still seems
Aggressive and unhealthy
As the two people who made him
Who share similar traits
But different personas
One sips on coronas
While the other ingests the *****
And that guy thinks he's my papa
But never showed me real love
I mean where was he when I used to sit in the bath tub
And lacerate my forearms and shoulders
When my mom cries I hold her
But when I cry
I curl up
And shed tears
And lay here
Alone
I sleep
And when I wake up its all fine
Because the past is behind
Me
All I get is rest to heal my ******* wounds
And on rare occasions
I get to watch the freaking moon
Yes that is the most
That I'll ever really get
And if I comatose
It'll be a situation I won't regret
But for now I'm really cold
And the people around me are all so late
The next time I choose to rest
I'm going to ******* hibernate!