Where am I going
What is my path
I have to make choices
Put aside my wrath

Trails lay before me
Like cards in a game
Which trail do I take
Will I end up in shame

Choices are not easy
Overwhelming at times
Which way to turn
I can’t cross that line

Stand still for today
No decisions can be made
Only time can guide me
All the way to the grave

•

I opened my eyes,



                                               And I saw you there,



                                                    ­ Smiled,

                                             Held my hands,

                         And carried me in utmost gladness,




We wandered in the seashore,

                      With our nonstop anecdotes,

                                        Your laugh,

                      Is like a wonderful orchestral euphony,

That always made my day so worth living for,





                         Then we stopped by and sit,

                         And observed the beauty of the sunset,




TOGETHER,




                                  ­                                                            Then­ with atonishment,

                                                   ­                       You gave me yellow flowers,

                                                      W­hich I truly love and adore,

                               Then I saw your eyes scintillating in gaiety,

           When you saw my smiles and teary eyes,




          I can't help but cry,

When you expatiated to me,

               For hours,



                                            About how much you loved me,

                                                            ­          And cared so dearly,  

                            Then promised to keep all that you've declared,




         That we will build future together,

                                  In the presence of our God,

And our future siblings,



I hugged you tight,

             You kissed my forehead,

                      And whispered love unto my ears,






We act lying together to gaze upon the stars,









But suddenly,








       You slap me hard,

                                       'Cause you said there's mosquito on my cheek,

And was awake!







                                                 ­        I realized,



That I am only dreaming,

In my dream.





                          © Earl Jane
                            ♥ E.J.C.S.

•

Your love is as sweet as the sugar,
                   That  I've been addictively indulging,
             For so many years.



        Every piece of you,
                      Is just the most gratifying that I have tasted!




                                   But when together we've been drowned with tribulations,





                                    You just gave up rapidly...






And dissolved!




                                   Integrating and going with the flow,

                         Of those torments and allurements,




Now where are you?




You are now a part of those afflictions that drowned you,


                                            I can still taste your sweetness,


                      Every time I sip through the trials,
                                That we've face,
          Resulting to weaken your knees,
    And been defeated,




       I was totally in great pain,


        To know that your love,

Can be just greatly surmounted,

                            By miseries in life,



But what can I do?

                                            I fight, you relinquish,


And until then,

You just become a memory,

Of an achingly baleful chronicles of my life.


                      © Earl Jane
                         ♥ E.J.C.S.

The celestial star owls mounted their attack. Light begin to burn away the shadow fog that clouded this beautiful  memory.  The addiction wrapped it's darkness around the light of the star owl and quickly consumed it. The star owl could not be saved. It turned into a star demon and a servant of the addiction.  The new born star demon looked into my eyes with dead light and false hope.  I was beginning to belive in such hopes. On how everything will be OK if I joined the addiction .  I could be a part of and endless euphoric light that will forever pleasure my soul.  I then was brought back from the dead light from the remaining star owls.  They showed me true light again. I was now fighting beside them in the light.  But the Legion of false hope was winning and pushing us back.  I then sent out an s.o.s to all corners of this galaxy.

I used to think I was all alone
in feeling the way I do
I went through life wondering
if there were others to

Now I know I'm not alone
and I can be myself
And friends are always here for me
in case I need some help

I wouldn't be here without you
My lovely transgender friends
I'd still be lost and hiding
In my closet until the end

Lj Mark 2015

Mr. Fawcett
Was a friend
Who ran hot and cold.
When he was hot
He drank a lot,
And smoked and toked,
And ****** and slurred.
We thought him quite absurd.
He wheezed and coughed
And finally croaked,
Turning himself off.