Was reading past emails again...
got really blushy and embarrassed
just like the first time I ever read your replies...
I wanna cry now... I miss you so badly.
Not the flirting, not your adventures,
but I miss the way you made me feel:
important.
You made me feel like someone wants me for once,
and sees me the way I see them,
in that wonder, with that intensity.
I hope you're okay, mon cher.
I want to be the one that carry your worries,
to help you through tough times.
Sometimes, it's better to worry about someone else
than yourself.
In fact I prefer it.

Did I say I miss you yet?

I'm just the girl                  I'm just the creep
Who loved you                  That loved you
Who else could I               Who else could I
be?                                       be?
What else could I              What else could I
do?                                       do?
Please notice the               Please notice the
past tense                           past tense
Cause it's not like             Cause it's not like
before                                 before
I did love you once          I did love you once
But now I love you          But now I love you
no more                             no more

This girl right here
That loved you long ago
Well, I'm finally through
Just thought you should know
I no longer dream of you
I no longer wish you were mine
Truly, I loved you once
But I've left those feelings behind

                    I'm sitting here thinking about
                    His mischievous smile
                    When you walk by, I look there
                    To where my new prince
                    charming sits,
                    You leer at me, finally realizing
                    That you're lost at sea
                    Without me.
                    I'm gone, you see...
                   You should've caught me
                   When you still captivated my naiveté.

You should have loved this girl back
I've got so much heart to share
I could have loved you so right
Unfortunately, you never did care
I'm glad I'm so over you
I can finally move on to someone new
What I want, you never did give
A real man and poet, who's so true

                   I've already torn you out
                   From your throne in my heart,
                   I dragged you out by the throat,
                   While you got scratched by all
                   the thorns
                   Lying neatly everywhere.
                   You stare at me from the ground,
                   Pleadingly, but
                   No... I have grown.

Not only do you no longer reside
Inside this heart made of gold
You no longer haunt my dreams
You no longer have the key to my soul
The love I gave, you took for granted
But now my heart is free to love another
After this, my poetry will have no more specks of you
You'll be out of my mind forever

                    No longer will I fall into your divinity,
                    I can't stand your fake holiness.
                    I am the devil that caresses your soul,
                   The creep that awaits you in
                    your mirror
                   The little parasite that will
                    poison your mind
                   Whispering hymns and psalms
                    into your fingers and lips.

Can't you see?
That creep that haunts you,
Is secretly me.
But now that we're both through
We'll taunt both your dreams
Tear you from the inside out
Ripping at you from you inner seams
We loved you without a doubt
But now we'll forget about you
While you're left drowning in the deep
Remember us, when you can no longer breathe
Sincerely ~ This girl and that creep

Every time I think of suicide, I write a poem.
My writing is what keeps me sane
I've gotten this far, so I'll keep on going.

My writing, my writing,
Thank you so.
For without you this one would not be written

Each time there is a blade softly pressed against my skin,
I put it down and write about this ******* I'm in
It keeps me alive, but keeps me sad.

I think I'm depressed, maybe I'm not,
Maybe I just want out.
Out of this life, out of this world, out of everything now.

If you hate me, I hate you too,
But nobody hates me more than myself.
I've known myself too long to love me.

Sometimes
I wonder about
Friendship
The meaning of the word
What friends are worth
And what I'm worth to them

It's at times like these that your favorite song
comes on the radio,
on this frigid, stale day
then it slips into your ears,
and everything becomes wizadry,
ecstasy flows through your veins the way the sting of the vaccine might,
though this time it is injected through your ears,
and it is pleasant.
It's at times like these that you have to get up
and dance your worries and tears and problems away,
forget the task at hand,
and to sing at the top of your lungs!

They were broken children
Their scissored minds ran them
In spirals
Until they sat with crossed legs
And crossed lips
To press themselves flatter
They were cut-strings marionettes
Who danced
In an attempt to wring calories
From their balsa-wood bones
Which refused to give
And who pinned their painted smiles
A little tighter each morning
They were snapped-spines picture books
Who’d been warped too far by society
And had had their pages torn from the crease
So that words hung like razor blades
And spliced from each vertebrae

They took them to the circus
Where they were the **** of every joke
But when the clowns speared them with dripping eyes
And artificial mouths that were stretched over grimaces
Like the dust-jackets from different stories
They stared back glassily
Because how can you be afraid
Of the broken clockwork of your reflection?

Everyday she takes on the mask.

She pretend to be something, just so she can fit in.

When she comes home, she takes of the mask in the mirror, and keep question herself about who she is.

If we weren't so judgemental we would have get too know so many souls, you cant even know.