my daughter bought me one
of those extensions for my cellphone--to take selfies
so I wouldn't forget who I was--as if looking at a "me"
in the face of my phone would remind me
I am John Smith, I am 73

and I had been an engineer
at a missile range for a 45 years and two months
that I had lost a finger in Vietnam and my wife
died in a automobile accident three years ago
and her name was Emma

but my daughter says I never,
not once called her mother anything
but "M" and now, whenever I read,
hear, say or write the letter M
I get a lump in my throat

my daughter has notes taped
on every surface of my house, reminding
me to eat, and take my meds--she placed
a big one on the door: DON'T GO OUTSIDE
but I wouldn't anyway

I like it here, where I think
I have been a long time, and it is filled
with things my daughter calls memories
and photos of a lady I don't recognize
with a sticky note on each one

the notes are all yellow and have
an "M" on them; I get that lump in my throat
when I see them, and sometimes water comes
from my eyes, though I don't know why
because Emma didn't look like that

And the drunken fair skinned girls
May as well have arrived on ships
With absinthe and fireworks
because I can't remember the last Time
Christmas came early.
Only in the season of Solace
December descends

hoping against hope
to find my way
back to you

I have truly missed being able to read and write. To read all the enjoyable poetry and to write what I hope you enjoy also has been out of my reach for a while. I recently lost my father and am dealing with and selling my childhood home and my mother and fathers world. This is the darkest place I have ever been in my 51 years of life on this earth but God sustains me. I hope to be able to read what I have missed soon and too write a couple to post.
All things work together for good too those who love God.
Thank you for reading
Robert

forever more
love abides
even in
the dark
lonely places

a cold silence
seeping into broken dreams
redeemed by love

"Have you ever seen someone create a rainbow with a 12-Gauge shotgun"

10
I'd thought about that new year's kiss
even during the months no one cared
about the holiday
Only to find my crush
with her ex, trying to decide
who's tongue tasted better

9
And while my ex
is receiving cute texts
from a new man,
I'm higher than I've
ever been
nurturing a borderline
****** relationship
with a bag of Doritos

8
And my friends were laughing
in the back seat
because I said
"The moon is sideways"
and I guess
they couldn't see the
poetry in that.

7
And though I didn't receive
a midnight kiss,
I'll most likely be receiving
a ticket for Indecent Exposure
in the mail.

So it wasn't a total loss.

6
And instead of wishing for happiness
I wished for the ability
to properly express the rest of my emotions
in hopes of achieving it.

5
And I hoped to dis-acquaint
myself from feeling lonely
in rooms so full of people
I can't even move
or think

4
And my friends are close
and I think they were
expecting more

3
And my sister
inadvertently became the
goddess of drunk girls

2
And seeing love fail
in nearly every direction,
I closed my eyes

1
People shout Happy New Year
but only truly wish it on
themselves