I cannot find the words to answer your lines,
it's been years since my skin touched yours at night
it's been a long night with no dreams
I am poor when it comes to writing about memories
and though our roads are separated now
you're still in some of the glasses I have
and in the cigarettes filling up my lungs.

I loved you the way I love
the sun touching me with its golden lights
the way I love waves crushing the shore at night
I had you with all my body
and with all the light
I was able to hold inside.

You had a way of digging in my heart
and make bluebirds fly in my evening sky
you were in my coldest nights
the blanket covering my heart.

time has passed and I know,
feelings get older everytime the moon shows her pale light
but believe me when I say
in my mind there are still memories
calling your name.

I'll keep you in the drawer of my mind
you've made me cry and you've made me smile
all in all we are just an ash blowing in the wildest wind
I loved you, I hope you know,
but it is time for us
to find another sun
another glass of poison
from which we'll drink and cheer
till in our dreams
we'll die under the  layers of our skins

I am sorry, dear,
but we had to pack our things
before destroying our souls,
I am sorry the love we shared so painfully died

I still hope you know
that
I loved you

the ghost of your name still haunts me sometimes
I know you still love me
and I wish one night
you'll find some other dreams to live inside

darling, your eyes have seen far too many of my gloomy hurricane days for you to still be here. i tucked away parts of me in hopes that my wild would go unnoticed but you read me bedtime stories and kiss my best friends. i want to ask you if your calluses hurt. i want to ask you if you hurt at all. i want to make us better. i tried to make you jealous months ago, i tried to move on. i actually kissed him that time, don't you mind? i used to feel like sinking deep into my thinking cave and drowning… but you swam there and coaxed me out, or maybe it was the other way around. now i watch you watching me. we sit in your car and don't drive until we've found what we’re looking for. nights pass like nights do and I think i'm okay with being so in love with you.

I let you in,
You pushed me out.
I built you up,
You filled me with doubt.
I gave you reasons to smile,
You tore me down.
I gave you words of encouragement,
You were the reason behind my frown.
I have kept every secret you told me,
You betray me.
I prevented you from feeling trapped,
You prevented me from being free.
You don't care,
You continue to hurt me,
You were never there.
You pushed me away,
Slowly at first, then all at once,
More and more each day.
Guilting me into staying by your side,
Controlling me like a puppet,
Making my emotions your free roller-coaster ride.
What kind of sick friendship is this?
Am I someone you really trust?
Or is this a friendship that won't be missed?

In you, I trust
but leave you, I must
this is all just too much
you left me with my heart to clutch
My insides tumble
your name, I mumble
You left me like a wreck
and got me like what the heck?
Expectations, *expectations, expectations
You were supposed to be my inspiration
but all you ever was my expectation
Now leave you, I must
In you, I no longer trust
You broke it with your own hands
for you only show up with demands
I was never a friend to you
because you're only here when YOU feel blue
You kept trying to convince me that it's true
that you actually care
but here I am saying "It's not fair."
because I can't say no to that look on your face
You always change the pace
I guess it's time
I no longer believe that this will ever sublime

Leave you, I must
*In you, I no longer trust

There's something missing in my life.
I can feel the overpowering ache in my chest.
Numbing only around you,
But I long for so much more.
Your smile warms my heart,
And your hands heal my scars.
Your lips kiss my soul,
And speak with it so calmly.
Taking away my pain,
Giving me more than I've hoped for.
Your perfection is calling my name,
And luring me in deeper.
I never lasted a chance,
I was gone from that first smile.
And that very first kiss,
Swept me too far off my feet.
But your arms are my safe haven,
And I'll sleep in them every night.

there is no answer
    stop searching
         you won't find it

it will only
   make it easier
      to lose your mind

i don't want to hurt you
   there's nothing left to hide
      i've given you everything i have

if you stopped looking
   you might open your eyes
      and truly see for the first time

do not search anymore
   only listen to these words
      and feel their true meaning

i am pouring my heart out
   hoping that you'll understand
      my complicated vibes for you

so don't look
   pause and listen
      long enough to feel

Once
I never knew you existed
You were not part of my world
And life was simple

Like a tornado of sensuality
You tore through my existence
Leaving a devastating
Desire in your wake

Your kiss was everything I imagined
And now .......

Nothing is simple

(C) Pixievic