If you want change,
Make a change.
It is up to you,
To deam what is true.

I hate how some of my poems,
Get read less than others.
Even when my over all pain,
And suffering smothers.
It seems the most real,
Poems I write my feeling covers.

The flower stood weary,
Sheltering a small bug.
But the bug grew hungry,
And said to the flower...
"Dont you ever leave me,
For I will surely die!"
He started to eat her petals,
And she pleaded him to stop.
"That hurts? Your mental..."
In her stem she felt,
That she knew she had to help.
For he would surely die,
That he could not find another.
So she let him eat her petals,
Watched him eat at her being.
When it was her time to leave,
He swore he would come with her.
But left her torn up,
I wish I had left and that bug had died.

You said I cheated...
I didn't,
I didn't cheat on you.
It is not my fault your abuse,
Caused my emotions to flow into other palms.
I didn't ever physically cheat on you,
No I didn't have s*x with another.
But I did thinking of whether,
I would be better with someone else.
I thought of breaking up with you,
Everytime you held me after screaming at me.
I thought of a life without you,
I thought of kissing him too.
I regret that with all my mind,
But Im glad I am rid of you.
Life is better without you,
Im glad I never loved you.
So I am sorry for wasting my time,
And with this writing I leave you from my mind.
I hate you,
But I am free now.

im sorry your life couldnt turn out like a fairytale. that instead of being loved and cared for, you were neglected and abused. im sorry that love wasnt what you wanted. im sorry that you read through poetry every night to try and make sense of this world. but i do wish you the best. i wish you happiness and peace. may poetry be your solitude.

He told me he loved me,
Then he left me.
Now I HAVE TO WONDER IF I AM EVER LOVEABLE AGAIN!
He said he would never leave me,
Now I HAVE TO WONDER WHO IS GOING TO STAY IN MY LIFE.
NOW IM STUCK WITH ALL THE FEELINGS OF
EMPTINESS....
                       LONELINESS.....
                                               ABANDOMENT.......

Why did he promise me?
Why didnt he do what he said?
Why am I not good enough for the simple things?
Why?
Why cant he feel these things?

Smile, Love; Break again
The same way again
The same ending again
Make mistakes; Last chance again
Get up again
Get up out of bed again
Be happy; Love again
I'll give you a chance,
To let me love again
To feel my heart dance,
Because if I never stopped
Never stopped loving you,
There's never an again to feel that...

Putting miles on the dash,
Or maybe I wanna be on it.
My life's in front of my eyes, flash
Maybe I just need you in it?

Tens of thousands of words,
Yet never enough to describe what you mean to me.

How do you know you have found your twin flame?
Is it random and unknowing,
Or is it something thats always existed?
For,
Oh how the first time I heard his voice,
My heart felt like the serenity - in the crashing waves amongst themselves.
And how when I first saw his eyes,
My eyes wished to fixate upon him - at every waking chance they had open.
How when he holds me and touches me,
My soul dances within me - feeling the flame of his igniting mine.
How do I know if he is my twin flame?
For Im not sure of the existance of one or even the origin of its name.
It certainly feels like it could be <3

I stared at the screen like an addict,
waiting for that flashing light to blink.
The dial tone of my phone's gone static,
waiting for you to pick up it.
I write on the page with all my ink,
and spill it on words hoping that you'd stick
Around.
Stick around like this addiction typical,
I have on every word you type.
Sipping the poison of your lips,
Like these flowing words and lymirics.
I inhaled your breath and puffed away,
Getting high off of every word that you say.
One.
More.
Short.
Breath.
And then freedom...
I didn't even get to taste your lips,
or feel your hands on my hips.
I never got to hear your heart,
or be there for even one single breath.
Instead.
We called,
We videoed,
We laughed,
We smiled...
And I didn't need your touch to know that you,
To know that you were there for me...
But you did.
That was your addiction.
Constantly wanting someone to be there,
next to you.
So you threw away the old,
And tried to find something new.
Stronger than the last,
something to change your path.
A stronger drug,
but you fell back into my texts.
And told me about your lipstick covered drugs,
The ones you said you didn't compare to me.
When you were the only addiction I had,
That I never even had...

"Are you drinking water?"
No...
I'm drowning in it.

Mr green-eyed, boisen-berry.
Please don't, poison-me <3

He loves me,
I love him.
Together forever,
Sink or swim.

I want to be touched,
I want you hands on my skin to erase every persons that placed their hands upon my skin,
Rubbing me up and down until the smudges that were left by those who did me wrong are taken off my canvase.
I want to be touched,
I want to be touched by your love and warmth and to be engolfed in the flames of passion,
Melting the ice and coldness from my flesh that froze over from neglect and feeling cold alone in the wilderness of life.
I want to be touched,
I want not only that but to be held in your arms and to feel safe, to feel at home,
Protecting me from those who hurt me or held me down from my goals and my ambitions and from being myself.
I want to be touched,
I want to be felt,
I want to be heard,
I want to be loved.

And just like that I'm falling again
Dont wanna see this one end
With a smile sweet as honey
Giggling "Please stop baby"
But boy your lips are my drug
Always safe embraced in your hug
If I die in your arms
Its the place Im supposed to be.

I open up my head,
Pour it on the page.
Emotions they spill out,
Now all are done and dead.

Frail to the point I'd break,
My body is this empty shell.
Fuelled by the fire deep below,
My stale heart beat a gift from hell.

And as my body burns down,
To the smallest of ashes.
I remember exactly how fast,
All this lingering time passes.

I open up my head,
Real it out piece by piece.
Fix this broken puzzle,
Leave my emotions in peace.

Remember a twig is connected to a trunk,
Build this body up stable and strong.
The fire that fuels my heart will,
Give passion and love forever long.

And as my body wears and tears down,
Slowly draining such a life better life from me.
I remember exactly how much,
I don't want to be six feet underground.

It's the job,
Its the friends.
Oh so thats why youre such a ***?
This just a means to old ends.
It's the family,
Its the money,
So that's the reason for your stupidity?
Everything just seems so funny.
It's me?
No, it's you.
Well if you'll leave me be?
I'll be happier, that's one thing true.

To feel lyrics and music,
Like a soundwave carressing your soul.
To remember memories,
Like a wash of water over your skin.
How one key can make you regret,
And that another can make you wish.
Melodies of memories.

They say they know me,
When they only know what they want to see.

If I fall for him...
I hope that everytime I feel his touch on my skin,
That it has the same passion and feeling as though the first time.

I dont know if im more sad that you left,
Or sad in the way that you left me.
I dont know if you actually loved,
Or you just said you did just to not be lonely.
I think to some extent you left,
Cause you knew either way you were on your own.
I dont know why you said you loved me then left,
But I know I need to restart now you are gone.

The first time my world stopped,
Was the first time I saw you.
Moments only last so long,
And soon you'll be gone too.

I'll live hours while the world's stopped,
For this moment not to be taken away.
And before we end up six feet under,
I will live like I'm going to die each day.

Is there such thing as,
Too much...
Too much love??

I wish i could look up at the skys,
And just see the stars.
Instead of devils eyes,
Looking back at me.

Some experience it,
In death.
Some experience it,
In life.
But losing a friend either way,
Causes apart of life to die.

If you could hold my hand... I'd open your heart and head like a book, reading each word with soft consideration. If you could hold my hand, we could read each others wrists and arms; like a story that is carved in blood and tears. If you could hold my hand, Id never let it go. And we could sit under the snow in a glass house and fall asleep together.

Life *****,
At least tattoos are better than cuts...

And I asked you what is love?
          Is what I feel, the thing I wish it is?
But when love is just,

Let downs                   and
Oppression
Verified            with over bearing
Expectations

                                   How can I say this is love?
          When love has only been torment?
And so I ask you, what is love?

I remember,
Running my fingers down the rounded frail page edges.
Searing with pain yet,
Somehow red wasn’t found seeped in the book.
The must of it,
Smelled of grandmothers, dust and home.
How do words,
Twisted into fairy tales take you home?
It really is amazing,
The imaginary feeling just as real as real life.

I don’t read,
Much any more than poetry on my screen.
Or if I do,
It’s chapter long textbooks filled with mind numbing facts.
Sometimes,
I crack open my brain and a book.
Just to feel,
As though I am at home and free.

He takes my breath away from my lungs,
And fills my life with temporary happiness.
Then he leaves and fades out like all beautiful songs,
I go back to a feeling of hopelessness.

Their songs play,
Allure me to sweet melodies.
Anticipating words they say,
Obscure obscenities?
Their words of love,
Participating premeditated thoughts.
Rhyming about things we crave,
Writing in knots.

Let me create a sound,
No one's heard before.
Scream it out loud,
I need more...
Than just songs...

Our hearts are the same,
How does that work?
Trying not to fall in love,
But what is trying worth?

Absolve me,
And take me away...