Submit your work, meet writers and drop the ads. Become a member
13.0k · Dec 2012
Cheater - A Rant
Ben Dec 2012
i'm in a dangerous state of mind
with no care for living this life
where human emotions are traded
for less than a pack of rubbers
but you didn't even use those
so how much did i truly mean
when the push came to shove
and grinding hips
with moaning lips
that whispered, screamed,
and cried his name
on the night you ****** my heart away
where loyalty takes a literal backseat
to pleasure
and a long term relationship
is laughing stock material
ha ha standup, ain't i funny
to look for something more than this
but i would choke on my own tongue
before i'd speak bad of you
my backstabbing lover
unfaithful friend
i hope to god it he was worth it
the cost was more than just tears
but blood spray on the bathroom mirror
and an empty place where i once
used to love
permanently empty
i can't find the will to care
more than a few half-hearted,
correct that, heartless
obscenities muttered under my breath
with ****** on my mind
a 3:30am fantasy to help dull
the pain that i should be feeling
maybe i'm just a pessimist,
fatalist, cynical, and negative
but my lack of surprise cuts the most
lied to by my mind for those
two months of my life
that i thought i had it all
better to have loved and lost
but even better to **** it all
and just go out with your name on my lips
and your lies in my heart
i hope you think of me when you're with him
that you choke on your tears
plagued with the worst emotions and loss
a better killer than any gun
i gave you everything and you gave it away
i can't sleep at night because when i close my eyes
all i see is you with him
9.7k · Dec 2011
Outcast Society
Ben Dec 2011

Nihilism at its finest

Bleed black the finest shattered diamonds

Of all the lost hopes and dreams

Outcast Society burning in the ruins of fallen Rome

Cynical skeptics, sarcasm dripping venom

Acid burns through flesh blood and bones

No one gives a ****, scream for a savior

Outcast Society burning in the ruins of fallen Rome

Shards of glass smile razorblades

Plague of loneliness grips your throat

Heart beats darkness through your veins

**** society, anarchy reigns 

Outcast Society burning in the ruins of fallen Rome

Shadow world of gray and stones and broken homes

Bleeding hearts and gutted homes

A black void in collapsing homes

Outcast Society burning in the ruins of fallen Rome

Cesspool of sick and stinking ****

Hungry ravish burning Rome

Parasitic beasts feeding on lost souls

**** you in and never let you go

False promises of help, burning, burning, burning, blackens the sky

Outcast Society burning in the ruins of fallen Rome

Nevermore the sun shines down on the wretched land

Outcast Society burning in the ruins of fallen Rome




9.3k · Jun 2014
existential feline
Ben Jun 2014
a grey and orange ghost
slips unfettered between
this world and
a quiet place
of muted shadows
until eyes like marbles
blink into existence
and my cheshire kitten
slinks into my room
with no more whisper
than silk on glass
7.3k · Jun 2014
backyard ptsd
Ben Jun 2014
acid flashback in the trees
         frenzied branches feathered leaves
swaying seizing in the breeze
           forming shapes that his mind sees
scattered thoughts attention free
Ben Dec 2011
and                                                              ­                                                            
that backseat "love" lasted only as long as the night
as the memories rush in that morning try as i might
to keep you outta my mind, you're holed in there tight
a battle between "love" and lust...(hint) love lost the fight.
we                                                        ­                                                                 ­   
caused kisses shared between those wet rival lips
and bare skin touching, form a feeling at these hips
down unbuttoned jeans that your small hand slips
hear that sound, like tearing, as our "innocence" strips.
*******                                                          ­                                                              
fo­rmed foggy windows from our skin we shared
and dissolved to nothing, ha, like we ever cared
  discoveries made at night shed light on how we faired
the sounds of "love" from my speaker actually blared
6.2k · May 2013
In Wonderland
Ben May 2013
The Morning After Part I
What the hell have I done? It feels like my temples are about to explode and the early morning light burns my eyes. My shirt is missing and I’m curled up on my Lovesac. I glance to the left to see Alice is sprawled out on my air mattress. She looks drained, even while asleep, and I think that I probably look a lot worse. Last night… What happened last night? It’s all just a jumble, my memories out of order. It’s a flash of colors, sounds, feelings and sensations, a blur in my mind. It feels like a tilt-a-whirl of sensory overload and I kind of want to puke. Then, like a dam breaking, fragments of memories flood my mind in a sickening torrent, too much, too much. ****. It’s starting to come back and that’s not even remotely helping, just making it worse. I feel even more confused and all I can think is What Happened…?

Ok! Let’s Party!
a three am party a trip edge
a witching hour emprise time to begin
a black and white strip of paper so thin
it looked so harmless, inconspicuous, even then
five hits for me, four hits for you,
placed under our tongues, we expectantly raise
eyes round the dark room for a white rabbits maze
or floating cat ears and Cheshire grin
the seconds pass, then minutes do spin
nothing shifts or shapes, bends or breaks
we wander to seats, choose movie to play
Scott Pilgrim Vs. The World comes to life on screen in a blaze

Trip # Cats Everywhere
“WE ARE *** BOB-OMB 1 2 3 4 - !”
cats are crawling slinking stalking
their eyes are glowing growing pulsing
and bodies moving sinuously serpentine
flowing round the corners of my eyes
fleeing from sight like shadowy wraiths
insubstantial  sensory stimulation

Trip # ****** Coma
“WE ARE *** BOB-OMB 1 2 3 4!”
Haven’t I seen this before?...

ringing blue lightning flashes razor sharp quick
cutting my mind in jaw breaking half
gasping for air I lunge forward hard
and break into silence, stillness, calm.
you have to remember to breathe
when things get fuzzy or funny or anytime now
otherwise sanity slips like water through fingers
or like rabbits down tunnels
on time to lost minds and messy motor control
****** coma, giddy, ecstatic, inescapable, unrelenting

Trip # I’m Melting
“WE ARE *** BOB-OMB 1 2 3 4!”
Haven’t I seen this before?...

I have to **** but the whole world is breathing
standing and swaying every step an adventure
entranced by the swirly dripping dropping walls
i barely stay balanced though trousers do fall
relief, ahhh, glance down what the ****!?
maniacal laughter rings through the room
I’m melting I’m melting in big drops and small
being pulled ever downward but never disappearing
warm like candle wax, thick and viscous
I’m leaving a trail of me on the floor

Trip # Music
“WE ARE *** BOB-OMB 1 2 3 4!”
Haven’t I seen this before?...

complex strains of sounds by vibrations
subtly influence the mood in the room
emotions experienced changing by song
upbeat pulse lively down tempo drops dangerous
I can feel the sound envelope my soul
Alice enraptured marries the music
sitting on moment to swaying the next
pressed up against me, blink, appears on by wall
(don’t drink and drive, take acid and teleport)
this controlling cacophony swells then settles
an ocean unseen deciding the trip

Trip # Alone
“WE ARE *** BOB-OMB 1 2 3 4!”
Haven’t I seen this before?...

Alice embarks on adventure to leave
a trip to the restroom a momentous maze
breathe deep and hold, keep it together
I slip from this plane to a place so strange
the chair is moving and so is her hat
were they ever just objects or always alive
pink and white fur slithers up in answer
caressing my arms sensual depraved
the laughter returns ever occurring involuntary
in fast rolling eyes at madness do gaze
I cavort around with fluffy new friends
tumbling and squirming wiggly worming
the fun never ends the fun never ends
“are you ok?” – Alice inquires
back after minutes turned hours
“is this how it feels to know you’re insane”

Trip # ******
“WE ARE *** BOB-OMB 1 2 3 4!”
Haven’t I seen this before?...

the blurry lights shimmer in colorful haze
I swim towards the surface lost in a daze
“hush now hush now you’re ok”
“how long was I out for” a question…a phrase
“ten minutes this time” “it felt like days”
harder to come back, feels like I’m drowning in rain
blood mixes clear with needle in vein
and fading to black and fading to grey
the blurry lights shimmer in colorful haze
I swim towards the surface lost in a daze
“hush now hush now you’re ok”
“how long was I out for” a question…a phrase
“ten minutes this time” “it felt like days”
harder to come back, feels like I’m drowning in rain
blood mixes clear with needle in vein
and fading to black and fading to grey
the blurry lights shimmer in colorful haze
I swim towards the surface lost in a daze
“hush now hush now you’re ok”
“how long was I out for” a question…a phrase
“ten minutes this time” “it felt like days”
harder to come back, feels like I’m drowning in rain
blood mixes clear with needle in vein
and fading to black and fading to grey
“I haven’t slept in eight days”
a half muttered phrase
“what are you saying, it’s been 10 minutes”
alice mouths back with questioning gaze
fade to black

Trip # Telepathic
“WE ARE *** BOB-OMB 1 2 3 4!”
Haven’t I seen this before?...
“mhm yeah like what like yeah what”
“mhm like yeah like what oh what like yeah”
“mhm yeah like what oh **** like what huh oh what”
“mhm yeah like what oh yeah like what mhm ****”
mhm yeah **** like what oh mhm yeah what”
“wait what?”

Trip # Blue Gum Matrix
“WE ARE *** BOB-OMB 1 2 3 4!”
Haven’t I seen this before?...

bubbles bubbles popping in pink
filling my mouth with cotton clouds
sugary sweet deliciously soft
seducing my mind into boiling blue bliss
I don’t notice the binary program lurking through unconscious thought
uploading software for changing perception
the transition to fiction so seamless like silk
I’ve jacked into the system with every chew
it’s twothousandwhatever in metrohive Tokyo
the future is different yet still feels the same
Alice sits solitary in darkened apartment
with wires like web strung throughout the room
all tracing with tracers glowing in ambience a glistening path
to electrical heaven, a desktop computer
my visual sensors are booting and loading
with mechanical perfection clarity arrives
a robot, I robot, created as A.D.E.M.
(Artificially Developed Emotional eMulator)
or A **** Excellent Machine (self-titled)
I sit up and blink as synapses fire
electrical currents carried on nanobig wires
I go move towards alice and watch binary code scroll
plugged into the network a direct hacker helper
this job’s objectives flash ‘fore my face
“we’ve got a big heist, security’s tight”
the scene’s fading out, cameras pan to the night

Trip # In Which I See the Future
“WE ARE *** BOB-OMB 1 2 3 4!”
Haven’t I seen this before?...

Alice and I curl up as one
excessive I know on this excessive night
but excessively is as excessively done, the social norm
it’s experience together and not alone
that draws us closer to breathe in unison
a chance to express feeling in this
uncharted sensory undertaking
together hearts beat in arrhythmic understanding
a feeling of pleasure creeps down my spine
and spreads out in ripples turning to waves
crashing and breaking on the sweet shore of…
alone in the bathroom I reflect on actions
for minutes and hours and finally days
I watch myself age and age and go grey
tormented by thoughts of actions and actions
guilt like creeping mold consumes my visage
decrepit and wasted I stumble from chambers
to find five am clock arms right in my face…

The Morning After Part II**
lysergic acid diethylamide.... an adventure every time
Ben Mar 2012
self-righteous souls
saved from the
everyday run
of the world
skulking throughout
the shadows
cast by the
most holy
grasping at
the lost the
unknowing and
the ******
who don't accept
their beliefs as
irrefutable excuses
to be pretentious  
oh how far you will fall when brought                                               low from your exalted pedestal
down on your knees, covered                                                   in the wretched filth of the masses
that you had gazed down upon                                                       in all you hypocritical glory
everyone looks the same when                                                      your eyes have been gouged out
you bleed the same as everyone                                                  when your too-godly heart is removed
you liar, you snake,
you backstabbing ****,
hidden behind
accepting smiles
go forth and
be righteous!
go forth and
beat down the weak!
go forth and fill
the world with
your treacherous,
blasphemous rage!
pray for the
strength to fell
the wicked
pray to keep
a closed mind
and to be
in your silent
hate, mistrust, and
suspicion of all those
different from you
pray to keep your teeth sharp
to devour those deemed less holy than thou
and go to a fitful, dreamless sleep at night
confident in the knowledge that you are *saved
so i wrote this at church today, sitting there and looking around at all the *holy* people and feeling utterly disillusioned with all the backstabbing and false smiles, all the self-righteous feelings of superiority, and i remembered why i stopped going
5.4k · Dec 2011
Ben Dec 2011
hookah connection
relaxing, thought provoking.
the waitress is cute
5.4k · Feb 2012
Ben Feb 2012
equality; a perpetuated falsehood.
THE POWERFUL devour *the weak
Ben Dec 2011
converse kicks
lead up to lengthy legs
soft as silk
flowing through my finger tips
the wrinkled sheets gather round
trapping our heat
in this sweaty mound
of limbs
tangled too close to be separate
joined as one
not at the hip
but quite close
awkward laughter
leads to young love
and sensuous sighs
escape past locked lips
and fly through the open window
coming to rest on the rooftop
where we first kissed
5.3k · Sep 2013
unemployed (again)
Ben Sep 2013
i woke up this morning
locked myself in the bathroom
with whiskey beer and netflix
a hot steam shower and
aching thoughts for a cigarette

they said be strong you'll make it in time
but all i see is a negative sum numbers game
ad infinitum forevermore on & on & on
another day another nicked nickel through my fingers

so instead of being a "productive" member of society
i'm drunk at 8:00 am and wallowing in self pity
but hey the shows are free
but this shower's gunna cost me
5.0k · Nov 2014
Christ Cheese and Sheep
Ben Nov 2014
In Spain -
where cheese-making stretches back
to centuries
is a medium sized lump of
Sweet ******* Christ

blessed is the ******
whose womb merited to carry
our small herd of
hand-milked cows
providing milk, cheese, butter, and ice

and to Christians,
the lamb is the symbol of when
the pope and all the christian leadership
will be succeeded by
Moo Jesus

The Good Shepard draws not milk
not liquid from his sheep
an overview over Greek pagan
and Christian pastoral deities

then Christ went and
made the exorcism and
he sold in town all his
rriegitha cheese, his curds, his milk

I mentioned that The Green Sheep
had an ad coming out
in the body and blood of Christ
how could the shepherds resist
the temptation?

I was refusing the sacraments
mysticism is cheese
Christ is cheese
better still,
mountains of cheese!

Is your cheese killing the planet?
The Wedding of the Dead:
Celebration and Restraint
Christ stopped at Ebola
first attempt at flarf poetry
4.5k · Sep 2013
Ben Sep 2013
let's try positive for a change,
change the wiring in this brain,
brain aware remain soul interchange,
interchange for sun and not the rain,
rain that made me always feel strange,
strange that i always sought pain,
pain for love, the emotions deranged,
deranged? insane! confusion did reign,
reign while i did fight for change,
change i gained, content not feigned
3.7k · Sep 2013
Ben Sep 2013
scarlet, vermillion, saffron, in air
samhain sacrifice for the coming night
brushstrokes 'cross limbs soon laid bare

arcane characters for the fair
symbols ward them till distant light
scarlet, vermillion, saffron, in air

offered to old gods in ritual prayer
last colors of autumn before winter's white
brushstrokes 'cross limbs soon laid bare

an iron will to survive, they do declare
a solemn pact and a sacred rite
scarlet, vermillion, saffron, in air

herald the end of summer's affair
golden head bowed to geimhreadh's might
brushstrokes 'cross limbs soon laid bare

still stand proud they do, with defiant glare
the trees of the forrest an enchanting sight
scarlet, vermillion, saffron, in air
brushstrokes 'cross limbs soon laid bare
3.7k · Dec 2011
haiku dubstep
Ben Dec 2011
wub Wub wUb Wub wub
dubstep bass drops! ****'s dank brah
wUb wub Wub wub wUb
Ben Jul 2014
it doesn't seem that i can get high enough
                                                                          or low
to find a reason for b r e a k i n g this cycle
                                                        cycle          cycle
of trying to become drinking buddies with my demons
or unconscious of the fact that i'm slowly letting my passions
i'm empty
on the ins
ide but at
least i loo
k ok.
3.4k · Oct 2012
after sex cigarette
Ben Oct 2012
calm and collect my thoughts
ethereal smoke twists upwards
indecipherable spirals winding
their way towards the moon
temporary existence
fleeting memories
my fingers grasp and hold nothing
a silly gesture - acted out
more so in a symbolic way
the ticking clock provides a
backdrop to this satisfied silence
as i take stock of my body
and file away the sensation
of skin on skin and desperate
moans for more
a midnight tryst held close
to my heart that's beating its
way out of my body and
finding its way into yours
with limited time to live this life
embrace it head on and hold me close
tell this dream to last forever
for a moment this special made real
could only be a fragment of
a sleeping mind
i never want to wake up
if time were to stop i'd be happy
knowing that this finite strand
of fine gold thread held high
by fate was made to last more
than the thin tendril of white
sighed out - brushed past my lips and into yours
Ben Jun 2013
spartan kick the fat *****
with their freshman album
hallucinogenic state of paranoia
a ******* screamo band
I will be the lead vocalist
I will take a hit of acid before each show and scream poetry while guitarist etc. play brutal ******* downtuned music behind it.
throw rager ******* shows
be like a cult band
get ******* famous
live ******* life
do drugs and be successful
stay classy kids
2.9k · Nov 2014
Ben Nov 2014
steel to skin, metal caress
most intimate touch
pleasure and pain mixing bold
sketching hearts on sleeves
walking canvas, ****** art
permanent war paint

regrettable decisions
just wait till you sag
tribal skull, rose indian
meaningless symbols
rebellious act
futureless punk ***** loser
nine to five. conform.
2.9k · Nov 2013
little spoon
Ben Nov 2013
sink into the silence
nothing left by nothing
a silent trip adviser
to blame the past on
levels of induced mindless
consumption that dealt
with the singularity breath
ghost located in page
after page after page of longing
caress and sniff and smell
the burning rubber sensation of
ice melted fire drops
dealt to deal with dealing
memories forgave in the think tank
calm in the blue raindrop
frisky frisk touch of soul
felt with eyes wide open
and a heart made of gold
to last ever last in the synaptic
convulsion that twitches and squirms
of a mental addiction love and pain
and parlor trick injections
did i mention the hopeful twist
of a sudden quick thinking passing
love is love actually and codeine is
a moment of unloved passive regret
o d on your section of unblinking
overwatch i snorted the powder
to happiness everlasting
cuddle with my corpse
i want to be the little spoon and feel your heartbeat in my back pressed selfishness to hold my soul and revel in the passiveness of unthinking
let me lick your inner soul and taste
the salt of a lie left on cracked breathless lips
2.6k · Jan 2014
sexual frustration (a haiku)
Ben Jan 2014
voluptuous round
satin soft silky *****
******* i need laid
2.6k · Jun 2013
free flow (love)
Ben Jun 2013
inception an idea implanted in past land
passed on dark wings to grasp hold fast
in sketched out morality soul aghast
push my copycat character past fracture
spiderweb cracks in arguments made
solely of self righteous closed minded glass
however deep these malicious tendrils
slip and strangle the growing tree of
a raptured unique individuality
with perverse views of gender love equality
and views with that they do not agree
that do not conform with their conhypocrisformity
i want to be free to be free to be me
i want to find my personality
i just want love, of self, of you,
2.5k · Dec 2013
alliteration crush
Ben Dec 2013
crazily chasing concocted crushes
however hasty high hopes
earnestly entangled erstwhile enthusiasm
left languishing limp lethargic
suddenly soundless stupidly selfish
every emotion enviously expectant
an abject apology absent

purposeful pleasure purportedly posed
unearthed unhealthy ungainly uncertainties
devouring devotion disgracing dogma
an accident awaiting arrival
Ben Oct 2014
focus needle sharp and glowing
piercing the rare white winter calm
of my mind at rest
like a ray of too bright to see sunlight
too hot to do anything but set
the edges of conscious thought ablaze
where they blacken and burn fast
curling inwards with steady flames
roiling over ashen fingers grasping at
the long forgotten Morpheus's throat
prying wide the sleeping god's eyes
fastened open by Prometheus's chains
Hades, Tartarus, eternal penance,
for bringing inspiration into this
dark human world
the price I paid in sleep for grades
2.4k · Sep 2012
the circle of life?
Ben Sep 2012
how tired how tired
the caged bird sings
before its beautiful neck snaps
between the claws of an angry
fat cat drool
drip drop dripping the ghoulish rubies
that snake past its serpent tongue and
sizzle when they touch its breast
scream like a banshee a women in the
throes of **** as the cats sternum
breaks between the iron clap jaws
of the three headed abomination
guardian of the judicial powers
champion of the executive law
enforcer of legislative judgement
slobbering grasping all encompassing
maw envelopes my heart in its
wretched gnashing teeth
and **** my marrow from my bones
with a sharpened gore covered protuberance called security
i see the death of my passions
in this hellish cycle - abomination birthed
from the depths of an elitist mind
control - a choke chain on the masses
2.3k · May 2012
Ben May 2012
i am abrasive
personality functionality deficit
yet i attract
beautiful women
to befriend the hermit of solidarity
will you go out with me
brought answers on no
my friend i could not lose
yet for the end of altruistic bargaining
i end up ahead
with false promises of a beginning
to an end my own personal
david lee roth would understand
that as i write in this
brought on by reading
778 comics in 12 hours
and a 4 day binge of  job for a cowboy
my mind wanders
as insomnia sets in
would i be one of the great
dissociative poets?
a dose of the unrequited free associative minds
free thinking form of diet coke with a side of purple strawberries no i meant blueberries
my mind wanders
and yet i look forward to pad thai on wednesdays with cute blondes whom with i stand
the chance of a bat in the mosh pits of a metal band
i win
for you all know the taste of yellow mustard
ramble ramble ramble
this indie pop poem
would it be ironic to like it
if one truly hates the wording
and yet loves the idea
one of lives greatest life mysteries
alcohol i bid thee a fair welcome
nimble bubblegum monkey wrench
how long will you read?
enough to to see my lack of coherent sentence structure
or that i am a flawed creation
going on and on about existential non existent problems
for i shall exist regardless of my best intentions
as the wheel continues to roll on despite the moss covering this ice slicked track
metal boar slayer of a thousand suns would be a good metal name from sweden
the mooring dove coos to the beat of an undead drum
boo hoo boo hoo cries the witch at the stake
i am done
Ben Feb 2012
books drawn


like moths to fires
flames promising light
i burned it
Ben Feb 2012
as i sit here awake
waiting for some comfort
only received by those
who venture into the
depths that the night offers
delusions of peace
and visions of grace
cloud my weary mind
yet do nothing to ease
my troubled heart
is there any truth
to be had from my restless vigil?
i - a sentinel of the moon
i - a watcher of the shadows
i - an eloquent fool
am driven to seek
a respite from the waking world
by staying the hand of
the sandman in hopes that
these mountainous mole hills
may shrink under my gaze
futile? it may be so
yet dreams that may keep my company
scare me more than any
insomnia induced hallucination
2.2k · Mar 2012
teenage suicide
Ben Mar 2012
death is blunt.

eloquence means nothing
and charismatic words
don't do a ****

death is blunt.

and infinite reminder
to this finite span of life
a permanent problem
to a temporary solution

death is blunt.

in the end we're all just dust
no emotions, no thoughts
just the soil and us

death is blunt.

the poetic anthesis
anesthesia of the soul
period. end. done.
Ben Nov 2014
phoebe will remain my hostage until
four barrel's hipster overlords hear my plea
we're all made of sparkledust and turkish delight
and if you hate drinking sonoma butter and
having money, my doctor Archmage Overlord
said the the "happy drink" element you seek is
less like strong coffee and more like the invasion
of normandy with turkey slaughter in the background

kfc's new turkey flavored chicken tried looking
for drugs in the neighborhood but
timothy leary, his suave excellency, sheik knight of nee
abstained from the devil's coffee with headaches and brain fog
anyway, that's why i attacked the
complimentary peanuts and russian balloon juice


"no one can understand the truth until
he drinks of the feline's frothy goodness"
flarf flarf flarf flarf flarf
2.1k · Apr 2014
Lancelot and Guinevere
Ben Apr 2014
Lancelot ye golden knight fair
Through Love’s decree, with coy invite
Enthralled the fey Queen Guinevere

How soon ye forget your sins laid bare
The Sangrail truth, the Heavenly light
Lancelot ye golden knight fair

With comely looks, a swaggering air
The greatest of all earthly knights
Enthralled the fey Queen Guinevere

How easy to shun this dolorous affair
If ye honed instead your spiritual might
Lancelot ye golden knight fair

With glory from lands far and near
Ye took her heart and forthright
Enthralled the fey Queen Guinevere

Le Morte Darthur, the kingdom’s despair
Was sealed upon the doleful night
Lancelot ye golden knight fair
Enthralled the fey Queen Guinevere
for my Arthurian Lit class
2.1k · Apr 2012
Ben Apr 2012
bitter is this transition, dusk till dawn
floating on half remembered dreams
one would expect tranquility
instead of a constant reminder
that i go to sleep alone
cold sheets with room for two
resign themselves to midnight solidarity
2.1k · Jan 2014
Cheshire Cat Country
Ben Jan 2014
my cat is my happy little shadow sometimes
winding through my legs room to room
purring like a diesel engine at rest
and the perfect reminder that you'll always always
be loved
2.0k · Nov 2011
A girl named Autumn
Ben Nov 2011
A girl named Autumn
reflected on the river floor
or is she drowning?
water or wind blows
her hair flows around
her rose red lips
as pale hands move
reach for the reflection
or grasp for air?
2.0k · Aug 2012
Ben Aug 2012
Crooked smiles breaking after midnight
Diamond eyes sparkle in the electric light
Running through through this modern town
We own the night
 As the lights dance upon our starry gaze
Invincible we fly towards heaven bound
This liquid silver runs coursing through our veins
And gives emotions thoughts yet unbound
And we sail ever toward the moon 
In ships made of fine gold thread spun 
From the suns last heavy sigh
I look towards the sky
And see innumerable burning seraphim
Dancing dancing in this city's glow
Of opportunities spread through our time
And chances mistook for mistakes
That led to a night of passion
Dripping dripping with tears unshed
We loved like lions and never once left
Our cocoon of embers never shed
I love I love I pronounced to the
Unending ocean of dreamers lay dreaming
As this body coalesced 
And my soul intertwined with yours
Forming a living breathing breath
Ben Sep 2013
i sit here and overdose in my imagination for the fifth time today
too poor to **** myself with a pharmaceutical fantasy no pain just sleep
it's a matter of time before i'm found swinging in my basement necrotic windchime
i'm not so much a poet as a sad kid rambling who can only write inebriated
this one time life thing is getting me sick and i just don't..
**** me i thought i was stronger than this yet years with a **** job
no girl and 5 weeks a night of left hand ******* while i choke down
another bottle bottle bottled my emotions in a seven dollar anesthetic
i've been romanticizing a wished for **** addiction at least that would be an
excuse for why i'm a wasted wasting waste of life doomed to insecurity
i can't even remember half the words i learned in school
you're probably sick of my self loathing and every poem i write is
just another narcissistic cry for help because i'm to proud to ball up and cry
don't even bother this time i don't want your reason for why i can't top myself
kick my bucket, burn my farm, pluck out my eyes and puke till i die
i'm ******* done i'm just too tired to try
to all those girls i never kissed - i love you
to all those ******* i never hit - i love you
to that boy that i might have found myself with - i love you
to my best best best friends the few that i have - i love you
i was never comfortable in my skin
maybe i'll  be comfortable in my grave
just a thought
i'm past caring what people know
i can't seem to feel anymore
1.9k · Dec 2011
kabuki theatre
Ben Dec 2011
graceful contortionist

Ben Sep 2013
self realization struck painful and fair
i was wasting my life going nowhere
and with the fresh pain clarity came
to better myself i'll never be the same
too busy to write more, there's a college to reapply too!
1.8k · Jun 2013
witch hunt
Ben Jun 2013
sleep deprivation and left hand love
a recipe for a night filled with self loathing
no matter the matter of cigarettes
i've killed on my arm
i still can't feel a feeling worth feeling
searching seeking self destruction

*applaud and cheer the sinking ship to
obscenely watch the dysfunctional waves ripple, grow,
rage, against this cracked and broken shore of my mind
enchanted by the beauty of the storm seductively
dragging the bodies of memories and passion
out to the deep blue sea to drown and drown
and drown again heads held under
until their souls stop screaming
Ben Jun 2013
it's all in the details, shadows tracing shapes
of ghosts of past demons seductive with
wide eyes of warm brown flecked moss green
whisper in my ears of delusions and grandeur
while fingertips trace burning lines in
the well worn patterns on my back
temptress, succubus, leech, smooth with
manipulative cunning and dangerous beauty
a haunting promise to kiss the poison lips
of a night filled with fool's gold memories
left in the morning with an empty chest
and entrails that went west with the setting sun
with the greatest beauty, and grasping claws
silk sharp nails hooked in flesh and conscious thought
leave me from your deceptions and lies
my sweet Lilith, I am but a disposable distraction
naught but a notch in your bed
you left with my mind and my heart
left my body but an empty shell
a wraith wandering this grey plane
1.8k · May 2016
customer service
Ben May 2016
my name's on the gold card she said
membership went straight to her head
told her *******
turned into a cough
smiled, said thank you instead
A limerick about my favorite place of employment
Ben Nov 2014
A few good cocktail days with eyes on July
and a day legend born of money and men and
man, impossible reacher of the wide never and away
with the risky business of love of love of love
of outsiders, of lions and lambs and losin' it
tomorrow the sky taps the endless edge of thunder
shut the vanilla chronicles of tropic love and war
go report on all ages oblivion and the samurai protocol
the mission of a ghost, the worlds of the last magnolia vampire
the right color of rain, the interview of Jack the rock with a gun
1.8k · Jan 2014
escape (repost)
Ben Jan 2014
a halo of expanding hopes, dreams, and life

a crimson teardrop, tribute to the fallen one's strife

encircles the head of an angel without wings

a splash of color to these dark streets it brings

porcelain skin, cold as the night's bitter kiss

spiderwebbed with cracks, seeping cool mist

this angel was once a most beautiful thing

bright cut emerald eyes, hair black like raven's wing

the angel in past had lived, loved, and laughed

how tragic this scene, that it could not last

for the angel dreamed flying, to touch the moon

but these dreams awoke jealousy, plotting, and doom

you see, in the city where this angel did live
t was mechanical, heartless, and did not forgive

run by the hateful human machine who could not fly

confined to the earth in a rage it would cry

"who is this angel to be different from us?!"

hate did consume it like mechanical rust

it sought a way to grind her into the gears of the machine

"since she is not like us, we'll **** her will to dream"

with that they commenced to wicked dark things

captured the angel and cut off her wings

broken and torn, they left the angel to the dust

content to proclaim "she is now just like us"

but the angel could never assume human form

unable to fly, she could not weather this storm

the moon in the night sky, silver and fair

taunted her mind, dreams turned to nightmare

confined to the ground, humanity rotted her mind

great beauty now gone, with decay left behind

lost to the madness, driven to the edge

the angel, a mere shadow, stepped to the ledge

porcelain skin, cold as the night's bitter kiss

spiderwebbed with cracks, seeping cool mist

the angel looked to the moon, once loved, in the sky

stepped forth, and though wingless, for a moment could fly

for though the hateful human machine

had taken her will to live, love, and dream

it could never break her call to be free

the angel found an escape from this cruel place to be
1.8k · Mar 2014
unrequited affection (tanka)
Ben Mar 2014
dreaming for her wild
curvy moonlight flesh, hellbent
his touches consume

water rides across her lips
eyes obey dripping but dead
1.7k · Dec 2011
Ben Dec 2011
seaweed salad on the side
salty, delicious... THAT octopus!?
1.7k · Jun 2013
grey day
Ben Jun 2013
save me from myself
human wreckage sinking
with ankles made of anchors
self conscious self abuse
the scars on my heart
i wear them on my sleeve
unlovable i've gone to deep
and no one wants a piece of me
drive me to distraction
while i tear apart my soul
searching for answers
to this god complex
i play with life and love
as a third person observer
and spend another night alone
writing "her" name with blood on my arm
i'm ok i promise
don't spare a second glance
i'm not worth your time
tragedy refined i'm almost cliché
bury me in apathy while i miss
the lips of emotionalism soft
just save me from myself cause
i'm trying my damnedest
to send myself to hell
help me.
Ben Feb 2012
waiting can cause panic
as sure as any fire in the room
while breathing becomes shallow
too little liquid courage
to drown my doubts
left in the puddles that gather
in the cracks of the sidewalks
                                                         - crossing paths
lead to the crumbling wall
that was once impenetrable
that still my heart calls home
my once beating, never ceasing
existence, a fire, a flame, a spark
left to burn down to ashes
a gutted ruin caused by worry
that reigned (rained?) from the sky

a world of color blanketed now
in all the shades of grey
a twilight where i may never
sleep, yet never wake
just race the thoughts that run
circles and circles and circles
in my head as the minutes tick by

i thought i was stronger than this
i told myself that i would not fall
and yet how the best laid plans
of mice and men fly to the wind
at the chance of love, the greatest
walls crumble at the chance to belong
and the very essence of my soul
strains at bonds, slips free
and sings to the sun of its hope

hopeless i am
lost in the ocean
emotion overflows
and yet i sit in my sinking ship
and refuse to feel, fail, and feel again
Ben Nov 2011
the inky black ocean watches, silent, as judgement day's unfurled
unaffected by the passing of time, by the anarchy below
in silk soft silence, chaotic is the death of the civilized world

the once calm waters of the void, now are swirled
smothering the fires of armageddon with its inexorable flow
the inky black ocean watches, silent, as judgement day's unfurled

silver pinpricks of light, into the infinite waters, are hurled
and liquid orange pigment leaks forth, ever so slow
in silk soft silence, chaotic is the death of the civilized world

around this blue and green marble, the vast water is curled
undisturbed by the hate and rage humans show
the inky black ocean watches, silent, as judgement day's unfurled

news of paradise's destruction throughout the heavens whirled
obliteration of one another the human race did bestow
in silk soft silence, chaotic is the death of the civilized world

the vast expanse of the ink black ocean is purled
as the earth was torn asunder with its final death blow
the inky black ocean watches, silent, as judgement day's unfurled
in silk soft silence, chaotic is the death of the civilized world
1.6k · Nov 2011
the lonely path
Ben Nov 2011
this path i walk is a lonely one
pursued by the shadows in the valley of my past
the bonds of brotherhood go only so far
as to remind me of the reality of solitude
the road of life is paved with lost chances
and littered with the bodies of regret
my conscience overhead like a vulture
picking apart my mind while
my shadow self waits for my soul
my self confidence my drive my life
to shrivel and die blown away on the winds of time
the path of red roses i leave in my wake
leads to my bleeding heart as lovers
tears crimson in this negative world
roll like raindrops then stream down
my tattered wrists
am i broken
inhale (the room rushes in)
or was i just dreaming
(a view of my mine)
(from a subconscious state)
1.6k · Nov 2013
wordplay (a haiku)
Ben Nov 2013
coy verbal foreplay
tastefully twisting two tongues
risque rhythm ...                          breathe
Next page