Submit your work, meet writers and drop the ads. Become a member
b e mccomb Sep 2016
c _ l _ e _ a _ n
d _ i _ s _ h _ e _ s

c _ l _ e _ a _ n
f _ l _ o _ o _ r _ s

something about
the lighting?

i haven't felt
right in days
a headache behind
the eyes and a
knot in my
stomach

(i know how
this one ends)


i'm the most
worst version
of me that i've
ever met

e _ v _ e _ r
m _ e _ t

m_ e _ e _ t _ m _ e
s _ o _ m _ e _ w _ h _ e _ r _ e _
e _ l _ s _ e

I WANT TO
GO BACK IN TIME
TELL MYSELF THAT
I WAS WRONG

W _ R _ O _ N _ G
S _ O __ W _ R _ O _ N _ G

(i'm stuck in my
own head again
can't get out can't shake
any of the thoughts loose)


BUT I CAN'T
THIS IS THE FUTURE
AND I'M JUST AN ECONOMY
PRICED PACK OF MISTAKES

m _ i _ s _ t _ a _ k _ e _ s

i want to hit
my head on every
solid surface in
the whole house

(wouldn't matter
it already hurts)


want to be
better
good enough so
people like me
so that i
like me

(but it's too late
and i'm not ready)


I HATE IT
THAT I'VE MADE
UP MY MIND
FOR ONCE

and if i will not
destruct
i may just turn
myself purple

(red and spotted
itchy and allergic)


BECAUSE I CAN'T
STAND BEING
ME FOR ANOTHER
SECOND LONGER
Copyright 8/20/16 by B. E. McComb
b e mccomb Sep 2016
eyeshadow ground into
a finely powdered bath rug
feet stained gold and as
straight as sink ringed coffee

(it's a perfect day
to run away
from all the crew neck
collars choking you)


fall face down into a
cornfield and climb
dead pine trees clear
up to the blackbirds

(i think you were once
upon a time the one who
never spent weekends
home and hurting)


i am not your past
not your mistakes
i am not who you used to be
but won't say it didn't shape me

(clattering red and
white checks skittering
across the floor as
hydrogenated oils)


i know you're
disappointed
sometimes in who
i've turned out to be

but i am also
disappointed
sometimes in who
i've turned out to be

(only ever thinking about
ceiling fans and my latest
mistakes or an odd assortment
of unspoken disagreements)


i can't breathe under
highway overpasses
in parking garages or when
my hands are made of leather.

(suburbia is just a
repainted mid-century
modern way of covering
up dysfunctional families)


here and there
then and again
i remember that you
probably don't love me anymore

i understand that
neglect destroyed you
but you don't understand
that involvement destroyed me.
Copyright 8/19/16 by B. E. McComb
  Sep 2016 b e mccomb
Anonymous Freak
There's a wall,
A rather odd wall,
Towering over the trees.

Made of glass bricks,
Giving you the illusion
It's not actually there,
But you can't really
See through them.

There's a portion
Made up of carnival
Mirrors,
And lined notebook
Paper,
And pens.

There's a paper flower vine,
Every few feet.
And a herd of excuses
Here
         And
                   There.

Some half painted
Canvas',
And song lyrics,
And poem verses
Stretching highest.

And a mile of it
Made of nights I held
A cold wash cloth to my face,
So no one could tell I was crying.
And a few bricks of a
Sense of ongoing.
And some cement blocks
Mixed with loneliness
And longing.
All dribbled over
With coffee, mod podge
and candle wax.

There's a boy,
A rather strange boy,
Trying to dig through
The laughs and jokes,
With nothing
But a couple well place words.

There's a fire,
Started by a lighter
In my hand,
On the inside of the wall.
The laughs and jokes,
Giggle nervously
As they're tossed away,
And evaporated.

But they keep
Breeding,
With the smiles
And sarcasm,
And everything I use
To keep people
Out.

And maybe,
I'm not trying.
Maybe sometimes,
We grow to love
Our mighty walls.
But maybe we all need to
Remember...
They aren't only blocking out
What we're afraid of,
But what we hope for.
b e mccomb Sep 2016
if you've got
four men
you've got
eight legs

(how profound
now shut up
and go to sleep
you're tired)


i am tired
sorry

everything around
me is bothering me
the furniture
what's on the furniture
the mismatch of
colors everywhere

(i hate it when i get
into the car and say
that i'm tired and you
ask me why i'm tired)


like i'm just
tired okay
i'm sorry
i can't help it

that the textures all
make my head hurt
pound and ache
and i'm crying

i'm crying because
i made a choice today
and i'm going
to keep living
even though
it hurts me.
Copyright 8/17/16 by B. E. McComb
b e mccomb Sep 2016
(i don't want to die)

i'm stubborn
and mouthy
you could even
call me a *****

(i _ d _ o _ n _ t _ w _ a _ n _ t _ t _ o _ d _ i _ e)

i'm stubborn
and mouthy
you could even
call me a *****

and you know
what that means?

this **** ain't
ending easy.


because what gets
me in trouble is
what makes me
strong enough to

stay alive

(i __ d _ o _ n _ t __ w _ a _ n _ t __ t _ o __ d _ i _ e)

I DON'T WANT TO
END IT ALL
I WANT TO LIVE
LIFE SO LOUD AND
UNAPOLOGETIC THAT
I HAVE NO REGRETS

*AND I DON'T WANT
TO ******* DIE
Copyright 8/16/16 by B. E. McComb
b e mccomb Sep 2016
i will not
not
go down
without a fight

I WILL NOT

NOT

GO DOWN

WITHOUT A FIGHT

will not

will not

will not

will not


i'm standing up
in front of my
demons to say

**THAT I WILL NOT
GO DOWN WITHOUT
A ******* FIGHT.
Copyright 8/16/16 by B. E. McComb
b e mccomb Sep 2016
a panic attack
in a parking garage
and an elevator
to escape

(a closed box moving
rapidly downwards is
not an especially
relaxing means of escape)


a summer of brief
digital inhalations
watermelon candies
sticking to teeth

(there's nothing like
rainy cities at night
to hurt your eyes and
make you dead inside)


cold feet somebody
has got cold feet by
the air conditioner
phone in hand

come to think of it
i never really asked
for love just expected
somebody would supply

i see everything
reflections and spray
painted numbers and
multiple ellipses too many

(i say nothing
let all the images and
thoughts collide so you
think i see nothing at all)


i'm afraid and my
hands won't stop
shaking so i'm never
going outside again.
Copyright 8/13/16 by B. E. McComb
Next page