follow you around with the pen
little traces of ink mark your every movement
little dribbles of darkness lost in the snow
where you buried me, so very far below

i've been trying to find the perfect words
to bring you back to me
so i keep sending you little makeshift pleas
but you swear up and down you've heard it all before

black and red up and down the pores of my skin
swollen knuckles and raised fingerprints
your attention sweeps through the tangles in my hair
i keep trying to see if you still care.

i'm sorry i can't leave you alone, no
because where your footsteps follow, the sun has shone
pressed against the windowpane
my eyes still search for you
lost in the crowd, faces without names
it hurts to say i wont be seeing you soon.

refusal of ignorance beholds the vigor of the human condition;
it is in this repertoire between our minds that this ligature becomes real
we stumble over ourselves in our entreatment towards each other
dearth becomes so substantial that our hearts coil in trepidation
and for the shattered souls, we close the seal
so hold your fathers, and kiss your mothers
for they have bestowed upon you the purest of endowments.

be grateful for that which you can comprehend
for the imbecilic nature of the beast
that we all contest to extinguish
only the sagacity of our spirits can transcend
or tame, acclimatize, at least
and this is how we must distinguish

the idiosyncrasy from allurements
i can feel your pulse beneath my feet
from miles and miles away
i want you to be my heaven-sent,
i want you to be my king.
in your bold winds i will sway.

and for your adoration i will beg
until i am shackles on your legs and
ropes to your wrists
cold as sand in the nights of winter,
i want you to be my man,
where we can find our own portals in the depths of mists
you can call me your angel, your sinner.

i am taciturn in my consciousness,
yet so avidly alive
what are we good for?
you are whole in your somnolence,
yet so passionately sublime
when will i be yours?

become a statistic,
another number in the game
with those newborn chemicals routing through your veins
like trees shooting through your skin.

my knuckles bled for the loss of them
and the paint spilled across the canvas
like arguments that never found the end
broken moments pass
all on your own

i know it well
the taste of your mouth
and the pressure of your grasp
i know it well
the hatred you spout
the tranquil that never lasts

constellations of marks on the flesh
minutes come and hours mesh
between the sands of time we writhe
only to find our hope buried in our minds

it's been lack-luster lately
the sunshine doesn't warm you
the way it did in the summer
and the oceans still beg
for you to come out to see
what lingers at the bottom
of the deepest parts of the sea.

i could've lost myself to the tides,
but instead i found the blade
and the blood had to dry
before the knot was made

accept that you've lost him and
you're not getting him back, no
you never needed a man
to tell you where to go.

Mentally feed the flames
With old, useless emotions
The smoke is putrid;
Make sure not to inhale.

Ashes of an
Easily forgotten love
Burn slow, burn eternal
The fire licks at your scars

His name imprinted
Into your already ruined skin
Do not think about it
Anymore.

Sit and enjoy the company
Of your lost pride
Lost love
But don't stay for too long
Don't speak too loud,
But don't stay silent.

Don't give me those eyes
The same ones you masked with honesty
While you'll told me all those lies
You never really loved me.

I know you're empty
I am too
But I will no longer be
Bursting full of you.

I tried everything and I blew you away
Like dust in the wind, like leaves decay
Your beautiful eyes and night terrors
I would wake up at the wrong times, in human error

Here is death and here is life
Intersecting points on an endless line
Men or mice,
I feel for them the same, all alike

The dead part of me begs for wholeness
And the life in me begs for you
Give into eternal rest
Or give the world it's dues
A world worth staying for
But you've lost all your worth
I'm waiting for you, can't you see?
You're the only thing I need.

I didn't mean to hurt you, no, man it's over
Over
Make a wish on a four leaf clover
She don't answer when I call her

I'm dead to you, so why not be dead to the world
If it takes my own death to see someone care enough to fight
My life unfurled
At the sight of your light

My bed is haunted
With reminants of you
Where dreams linger,
And touch echoes.

A deck of cards
With a king of hearts
Fifty two reasons why
I fell in love with you

But now it's time to back away
From the catastrophe at hand
Two hearts collided
With no where left to run

It's grown old and tired
Fleeting, easily
You came,
How will you go?

work of the artist
never comes easy
one, two, here we go
down another road
to the unknown

time is fleeting
humming tunes of wisdom
why must the broken feel so deeply
only cause you loved them

one rose left
till the season's over
the wind's blowing harder
but you still haven't faced death

survive
the number one goal is
breaking loose
off the tracks
but we're still alive
despite this
throw away your noose!
don't make this breath your last!

present tense hypocrisy
not quite alone
but alone enough
in misery
i can feel it in my bones
this sudden rush

Sick of your apologizes
Because sorry cannot wash the blood off our hands
Here is our love's eulogy-
Here is the darkness in which I stand.

When your only passion has been cut short
When all you had to live for is twisting around into a world
Where everything has gone wrong
And no poem, rhyme or song
Can put it back in place.
See, I had dreams of keeping lives safe,
But now I don't know the right I hold
To do so, to be so bold,
I am not sure if I will make it out okay.

I've regressed back into that void where empty promises are sunlight and lust is the closest I can experience to trust
And I don't remember a lot of things, I don't remember what it's like when I'm on the verge
All I know is it's all I have to avoid
I don't understand why I have to live off of artificial serotonin and coping methods
And I don't understand why I have to live at all, sometimes,
Sometimes I think you were the best thing to happen to me but the worst thing I've ever had to lose.

I know it all, I've heard it all before
All these reasons why I'm here
All these people who care
It all becomes make believe in the face of my hell,
My own personal hell crafted by my mothers broken teeth and my fathers swollen feet
I like to think I ****** up for a reason.

I've burnt the 3,000 mile long bridge
Constructed between two points; known as me and you.
I liked to call it love, but the flames engulfed all of that hope, too

I'm not going to apologize,
Because sorry cannot wash the blood off our hands

the same hands that once loved you
are now the ones wrapped around your neck
i can't breathe so smooth
like the way your chest will rise
and fall

i promised no more
but came up with many
words you'll never see,
you wouldn't care to, anyway.
and we used to breathe together
so it's gotten hard for me to
without you

it breaks my heart
to look into your eyes
and see the sins i have deployed
upon your love
it's over, now
all is said and done.

i came, i conquered, i saw
i put it all together
just to tear it apart
and sighs can not expel the darkness
creeping through my mind.

bleeding will give you
no forgiveness
and screaming will hinder
no blows
stop your crying, young soldier
you cannot claim the victim this time

the same hands that felt you
are now gone forever

my room sighs with the loss of you
the love it saw between cold sheets
lingers no more
the pillow sobs its last
when it realizes it will hold your head no longer
blankets curl up, lonely
knowing it will not wrap around you again

your warm skin felt like the summer breeze
every cell sang in unison
for the passion they recalled
your mouth is a sea of irrevocable mistakes
just give me one more taste

your fingers in and around me
played me like the puppet i am
where guilty pleasures are all we know
the crack of hollow bones

my body is useless
without yours beside it

Had a dream about my mama last night, keep getting little flashbacks of memories with her. It's been five months since you passed, and I'm finally realizing all the good things you put in my life, despite the bad. I wonder if you're somewhere in these heavy winds singing the weird little "Ming songs" you made up for me. I love you mama, I like to think you're still with me in the things you taught me and in that blue sky we live beneath. Call me a dweller, but I am thinking about you today. And for once, it's in gratitude and nothing but love. When you were put to rest, so were my grudges. You weren't the best mom, but you were one hell of a friend.

Shake up your bones
And pluck your veins
In hopes for a rhythm,
or a melody.
The body is your medium
Between the mind of the soul
And the crushing reality
None of us can comprehend the same.
You can still find inspiration in rotting corpses-
Keep your tombstones to yourself.
The only things constant in life are change and death.
Invisible languages that only the mad can hear
Make them prophets in their own eyes,
And insane in ours.
My mother
Spoke to Lucifer.
She was dead before her body gave
Her eyes were shallow, empty
There is nothing
Like talking
To the soulless body
of someone
Who you gave you life.
I am haunted by the deceased.
They do not come in physical form,
They do not come in my dreams.
They do not come to bring me harm,
They do not come to bring me peace.
They come in spurts when my fingers
Set sail over the pages, or the screen,
They come into my words when I can't hear myself think.
I do not write for me anymore,
I write for ghosts.

you closed the door without even looking in
you were too scarred to even begin
and when i wait for you, you never come
because you're far too busy searching for the meaning of life's conundrums.

and you don't see what i am
but i see who you are
i've been traveling, from land to land
but even here at home, you couldn't get much farther

i'm pretending i don't care but trust me baby
you broke my heart in the matter of two weeks
i don't care if you regret it, love
i'm alone again, it seems

so build your house of wax and leaves
i'll be the sparrow hiding in your trees
remembering a simple kiss
ah, it don't mean ****.
it don't mean ****.

i got so attached so fast
looked back on the plane and saw our past
shoulda' known it was too good to last.

i needed a new muse
you needed someone to use
i wanted something brand new
you wanted something, but you never knew.

so i wont knock upon your door anymore
i wont stand at your steps, awaiting
because i don't know what i'm waiting for
just knew i was ready for creating.

You are the frigidity in my bones
I am consumed by you,
Like the way the autumn moans,
And succumbs to the winter moon.

I love you from your eyes to your entrails,
your mind to your skin so pale.
From the depths of your ribs
to the safety of your skull.
Your sins, your blessings,
you as a whole.

and time is moving faster
the night has grown long
my heart a slave, your touch the master
you make my skin sing the loveliest of songs.

i could not begin to bring up
where i end
and you begin
you are all i need, but you've had enough

so let me fade away
from the place you gave me in your heart
i promise the words i say
will end as soon as they could start

hate this and i'll love you
all the same
that word's got me up all night

i don't even want something new,
no, for you are the rain
washing away the blight
of loneliness

sorry
in the
crevices of my
knees

optional
fates

tear away at
her
independence,
sorry.

let the caged bird free
though you'll miss the songs it sings.
my muse is gone, he went away
for good, forever,
no more words will stutter off my lips,
fewer sentences to scrawl
i get anxious at this time of day
noon, where the light doesn't matter
i gouge my eyes until all that's left are the sockets
all this ice beneath my feet, but i'm yet to fall.

i have dreams of men falling in love with me
and everything is as pure as they can be.
oceans beneath the winds
faith beneath the sins
i haven't lost all hope,
despite the loss of you.
what have you done with all those love notes?
did you throw them away, too?

i'm alone, but that's alright
because loneliness is something i grew up with
no eyes, but i haven't lost sight
of angels soaring, or spring's solemn kiss
phlegm built up in my throat
from all the smoke in my lungs
often times, i've found myself in the cold without a coat
do you understand me as i speak in tongues?

the evening sun kisses me goodbye
when the smoke rises
and tears fall

come over and stay
for just a little while
we can watch the rain fall
with our brown eyes

i'll make you tea
with ice cubes in it so as not to
burn that heavenly mouth
i found a home in months ago
but you packed my bags and through them
out on the curb,

foreheads pressed together with your eyes locked on mine,
you say "stay strong"
when you are my sole weakness

white powder and green flakes
oceans rush in after your wake
i can't stop with the poisoned lungs
and the blisters
or the lines on my throat

angels and devils
all lined up to see me fall
this was nothing
to you

i love the way you speak,
and the way you show me the ways
all the ways you'd touch me
it's only been a few weeks, a few lonesome days
but that's all it takes
for me to see how lovely you are

and to think, regardless of how far
the land stretches on between us
we still can see the same old stars
show me the differences between love and lust.

and you're so healthy in the way that you move
giving me the fire for those bad habits i've got to lose
so maybe, just maybe, you could be my muse,
would that be okay with you?

i don't care if it rhymes anymore
it just needs to come out
victims of birth all lined up
like cogs in a machine

steel lined bodies all ready for war
their minds were blown away
by the winter winds
so they carry their weapons of mass creation
to destroy the whole world

seasons change every year
it's something you can count on
i'll be changing, too,
november has arrived
to carry me away from you.

because you're no celestial body, no
gravitational pull expelling from your fingertips
you are just like all of us
you are a parasite

there is a rage growing inside me
i will break free
i'll rip up these floor boards
leave you inside

nail up your coffin and break you free
when you've decided to put it to the side
forgive me
or forget me
shallow as these polluted streams
the city will put to sleep

Damaged seeks damage
And misery loves company
I think that's why we're best friends,
We understand each other's melancholy.
I realized out of the blue
That I've never written anything for you
And that's just ridiculous, you know,
You're the best friend I've ever had
You're angry, and I'm sad
But deep down inside it's the same broken path
I destroy myself for the hell of it
And you watch with open arms,
You stick around.
Thank you for that.
It's three thousand miles of pure *******
But at the end of it all there is nothing more sincere
Than the way we can laugh with each other
After so many long years.
This is pretty messy, this is pretty dull
But I wanted to write something that hadn't been said yet
About something that hasn't grown old.
Our bond is irreplaceable,
Irrevocable.
Thank you for showing me unconditionality
And thank you for being around for refusing to forget.
See January 23rd, 2019
Is gonna either make or break me
I will fly my way across this torn land
I will stay by your side.
And when the clock strikes midnight,
January 24th, 2019
Will break it's way through the clouds to greet you.
A world without you would break my heart
Every day that came.
And in the time we spend apart
I learn the spaces between your name.
This one is yours, for you to keep
Please remember me, when you turn 23.
Boost Post

hello you and your
crooked smile
how are you and your
river of denial
are you drowning,
are you living?
are you ever really
here?

hello, love
and your blistered hands
where are you tonight
and are you still in love?
i never meant to hold such
high demands
i just wanted it to be right
i wanted it to be love
the love i'm undeserving of

words that rhyme
syllables locked in time
hello, my dear
are you still here?

say goodbye
to what once was
go and let it die.
just because.

You find love in the bottom of a bottle
Or even, maybe a can.
Your love died from the same very thing
That you reach for so dearly.
I understand that cold hard grip of addiction
Of something that slips down your throat and into your blood-
But it's different with you.
I thought maybe my near death moment
Would've opened your eyes,
And I thought that maybe my words
Got inside your mind.
But instead you choose to die faster everyday
You choose to die for a buzz that lasts not even for a day.
And I'm not angry. I'm just sad.
I don't want to watch you die
And they say that's love, watching someone die,
But this disease killed my mother, your lover
I know she wouldn't want you to go the same.
And these words are futile, they are hopeless;
They do not rhyme.
They do not have melody,
They do not flow sweetly off the tongue.
But they are honest, they are sincere.
You are my father,
But not when you are drunk.
Boost Post

knives behind my eyes and
blood dripping from my skin
here comes the feeling we
thought we had forgotten

the wolves are watching me with
hungry, angry eyes
from the darkness in my mind
they linger quietly, waiting to strike

i got blood on your sheets,
i got a ransom on my neck
nooses and blades all sing
for me to utilize them

piano keys light the way home
trains are screaming from a mile away
80 miles aint too far to go
from a home where i should've just stayed

i have your name on the cuts on my arm and legs
i stopped with the ravaged skin on the newly tattooed wrist
here we are, us lowly dregs
i still can remember the first time we kissed,
like it was yesterday

Every tree in the forest
Fell right at the same time
And nothing in that moment
Felt so far away from the sky.

You breathed your last
Through an autumn mist
The sky turned gray
And those leaves were a thing of the past.

Where will you go now,
Lost wanderer?
Will the clouds
Mourn for you;
The free bird?

I am starting to think I don't make mistakes
And rather, mistakes make me.
His favorite play is "Something rotten,"
His favorite woman is someone rotten,
Spoiled with the love she doesn't deserve.
Her hair ran past her back as a child,
But as time grew shorter and shorter,
So did her brown curly locks.
Her mother bestowed them upon her,
Among other things, she tried to cut short.
"Look at the moon," he says,
As he drives us home
I hope I'm your right hand woman
Like you are the wind beneath my wings.
I am always making mistakes,
They follow me around,
closer than my shadow-
From spilled beer to spilled guts
I wish sometimes I kept it to myself.
I am always making new passageways
Through the love you keep around,
Give me your miles, I take lightyears
And still you hold me at night without doubts that
July 20th, 2020
Will be the day my mistakes
Have all lead to a life of what love was made to be.

spent the night chewing on leaves
face down in the dirt
cracks all over me
although, i wouldn't say it hurt

we're in this sick convulsive cycle
of holding hands, then breaking our fingers apart
till the bones show, by some miracle
we were not hollow inside after all.

i cannot say i mind it, though
because of all the confusion, i had to choose
it was no thought in my demented mind to have chosen
the flickering flare of light that is you

but so i did
and so it goes
here we are, my only friend
where you embark, i follow

it's harder, now, to let the thoughts flow
now that i've learned to let the bad parts go
and where the pen meets the page,
it seems that i've finally broken out of the cage
that held me hostage for so long,
another day, another song.

the ocean doesn't call out to me anymore,
to take me away to the void
and maybe I've become this sorry *****,
but almost all those demons, i have destroyed
they lingered in my core
waiting to take over

And they did, for the time being
a past so infinitely profound,
i feel like a blind man, for the first time, truly seeing
all the light around
i am lonely but i am whole,
no longer an empty shell, no longer sorry and cold

no apologies for the people i let down,
because they never would stick around
even after they visit me in a hospital room,
after my impenetrable doom.
the sadness was so engulfing,
and the wounds would not stop pulsing
to remind me of all the souls lying
in the ground, in urns
they were all trying
but can never return
they are angels now
they are found in the clouds,
the sea, the trees
they are living on in you and me.

we all fight different battles,
but in the end we bleed the same.
i remember the love i found back in seattle,
and i'll never forget his name.

First one, should have been the last
but now our love is left in the past
a future that holds a new reality
to keep you in the present, with complete totality.
my lips are cold
my heart is full
of longing for what once was,
but excitement for what will be.

no hurry, no rush,
the words will one day break free.

the sun turned my trees orange and
the skies match your ignorant hue
yeah so it goes
cut off all your hair
paint your nails a new color
scrub the dirt off your face
theres nothing underneath
yeah so it goes
drink all the cough medicine
and call him again and again
listen to an answering machine
until you can sing the lines
with pristine excellence
so it goes
read your book and write your prose
till the snow melts below you
it washes you away
the marks on your skin wont make a difference then
the itch in your groin wont raise a finger
so it goes
the world is turning round and round to a
nightmare
papers burning, scattering in the winter winds
*******

you've got the night
love just like words
hope inside,
feel the fingers, gone

that long old broken look
you'll hold loose
stay in bed
with your tree dreams

the world came to forget,
apart from remembering,
the sound leaves tears.
dead, hard, growing bones

wont meet that man,
lips like air,
drown, dear

faces watch
arms run
lungs hide
breathe, die.

i wish burning hearts closed
pretty smoke, tired scars
your clouds breath shattered,
lay, wait

god met ashes,
the sky turned hopeless
sick of leaving stars
snow sheets make no difference anymore

walk, smile.
grasp the breeze, gentle.

here's to a lover that doesn't want me here
here's to a lover that wants me gone
here's to you, an angel disguised as man
here's to the bleeding broken heart thumping away in my chest

here's to all the liquor my body wouldn't stomach
here's to the blood, the marks i left along my skin
here's to the fear, the crippling terror of being trapped in your own head
here's to the selfish ******* said you loved.

here's to the nights we spent in bed
and the days we lingered under sheets
here's to the kisses we shared
that didnt mean **** to you

here's to the love i thought we had
pulsing and beating through one heart
thought it was mirrored, reflected inside your own,
what a silly mistake to make.

i've been having recurring dreams
of the beach
last night you were there too
lying in the shore, just me and you

the drink you poured all over me
missing the love we shared
but so you remind me, it was never there
loveless records play on repeat

so it was lust
wrapped in a gentle breeze
with each exhale we must
remember what we want to be

these words are growing tired and old
and my hands have gotten frigid and cold
this has been going on for far too long
replaying like some worn out song

the radio sings to me
these stupid songs they always repeat
i cannot wait to meet
the one to set me soaring free.

red lip stick stains on
yellow pages, phone books and
cigarette tubes

he comes upon me like the way that
storms come upon this town
eventually, and all at once

where the rain kisses
our skin to sleep
and the thunder turns on its lights
to wake us up again

parasites that **** at your blood
come flying at you in the winds
the clouds cloak the sun,
she bows,
goodbye

make way for the summer rain
where the air finally cools
and the storms roll through

I'll try for myself, and this self only
For this one is dedicated solely to me.
With auburn hair ******* in a bun,
This angel knows not the sight of a gun
She once chewed the barrel, she was barely the age of three,
The taste of the metal and scratches on her teeth.
Overcast sky and the smell of rain
She has fled from the souls that drive her insane
With warm down blankets, she now sleeps alone
But she misses those lovers, she had barely known.
They used her and played her without a clue
Not a **** idea of all the good she could do
Because in a boy's eyes she is merely an object
But it's about time I get off this subject.

Belief in temptation, responsible fees
She had a subtle inclination that he would fall to his knees
Upon the sight of her, so full and so proud
A blessing to this world and the universe abound.
She listens with patience and unconditional care
She only picks flowers to put them in her hair.
She is delicately different, in all the right ways
But no one can see her in the light of day.
As it shows her true colors, all kindness and love
And these children in this town know nothing of the above.
You cannot see colors in the spectrum of light
Until you've lost it all, in the dead of the night.

why waste your words
on one who wont ever hear
who wont really care
when the sentences fall in line
with the scars on your wrist
and when the period comes
before the comma
to send your fairy tales a different way home.

i've been biting at my fingernails
until their crescent white is gone
and i've been leaving you trails
on how to get past this over-stretched yawn;
a hiccup in our story

have you ever laid at the spine of a tree,
looked up
and saw the leaves?
they're falling, but not for us,
no, they fall for a greater cause
the change of november
will swallow you whole
spit you out
and leave you
alone

what doesnt **** you makes you wander
those frozen minutes drag out longer
what doesnt **** you makes you ponder
hearts no longer growing fonder.

hold on for dear life
before it throws you off the edge
sometimes its all you find that's left
it gets too hard, sometimes
for us to remain in line
but don't cry, little soul(dier)
everything will turn out just fine.

i promise to keep you warm.

i still want to spend
all the beautiful days with you
but i no longer bleed a shade
with your name laced in the hue
i am tired from nights i've lost
to the thought of you

the likeness of our minds
repel and confine
i have so many things to say,
with no where to begin
but i suppose it's okay,
since you'd never care to hear them.

this is not a love letter
this is not a suicide note
all in all, i've gotten better
but upon your name, i still choke.

m not suicidal or anything, i just really want to die

reflection in the water, look between the lines

see the difference between being here and being alive.

i got nothing left to say

been sitting on my lonely *** all

******* day

from summer, to fall

nothing has changed.

i’m still on this precipice

you’re still tired

of me and my explosive fits

you have this patience i can admire.

my lungs are full of disintegration

and my heart has been screaming all day

give me a sign, some sort of revelation

give me something more to say.

of all the love i have come to make
and all the hearts i'm yet to break
there is something so subtle in the way our eyes meet
when you're skin is my skin, and you are a part of me

the hazel green, and stubble on your chin
my mortal machine, lovers drenched in sin
is it electricity or madness
where felicity finally left behind the sadness
i cannot wait to see you again.

i hope that water leaks from faucets onto our skin together.
i hope that we can lay in bed and shake the mattress with our laughter.
i hope the heartache we've known, well it just won't matter.
let the boundaries fearlessly shatter
for us and all the mindless chatter

you're sweeter than smoke in my lungs and
i wish you were here.
awake me, give me touch, cause i've been so numb and
i wont watch you disappear.

so it begins
where i love you more than you
love me
and it was destined
to happen again
this is where "i love you, too"
starts to mean more than what you see

i keep spurting out these words
i know i smother you
i know i am disgusting
but your voice is the only one
i wish to have heard
say it to me, too
when my heart is left begging
but she is still your rising sun

i cant stop
with what i want to give you
i want
to love you
to death

i burnt the letter i wrote you to a crisp
the flames, they licked
at all the pages of a love i thought i'd miss
and the ashes, they smoldered
blew away in the wind
like how we made love, and we'd shoulder
all of each other's broken sins

now you're finally gone,
for good this time
the time has come, for our chaotic song
to come to an ending line.

i will love without you
i will live without you

so now
i will suffer without you
find myself in the whiskey
lose myself to the keys
they print out letters to feel for

leave me alone
you said, with bitter emphasis
i cant stop crying
i cant stop victimizing
hate me until i
finally can curl up
and die

wrap those lovely fingers
tight around my throat
let me collapse
in your grasp
oh my only one left
why are you like this

TRUTH IS I AM LIVING A LIE
AND I SEE YOUR UNFORGIVING EYES
EACH TIME I CLOSE MINE
I AM A UNIVERSE OF MISUNDERSTOOD MISTAKES
AND DRIED UP ROSES
BUT IF YOU LOOK
CLOSE ENOUGH
YOU WILL SEE GOD*

i've done all i want to do before i die besides seeing the world and falling into requited love but this world, this life, this universe seems to have some ****** up plan for me and i'm not so sure what it is. there was a time when i believed i could change the world but then the world changed me. i am swaying like trees in the wind and my eyes are closed and i cannot hear them calling my name over the sound of the shore that begged me to stay, although i have not seen it since the late fall, and now it is late winter and there is snow all around me *bury yourself inside of me it is cold in the wind but warm under my skin, i promise i will share. we spent evenings huddling for heat and we spent mornings under sheets, under each others skin. now i am alone and desolate but that does not make me any less whole or any less real. i am a human being and we all need love.