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today is like all the days that have passed
i fall backwards to tomorrow
it seems like yesterday will always last
i fall forward into sorrow

my stomach churns, i live in the pit
i am trapped within the burning
feeling sick from swallowing the ****
the same old thoughts returning

it's all the same when you live in yesterday
when you wallow in the sorrow
when you look back just to find your way
it's the same old tomorrow
When you have nothing to write about,
But you want to write anyway,
Guess you can even write about having nothing to write about,
Like I'm doing right now.
So ideas creep in when you begin to write something even when you had nothing in mind,
Be patient with your head,its not a machine,
Its not always that ideas have to be well lined up,
Let the mind wander sometimes,
Its good.its alright
Probably
Advertise
to
make you feel
ugly,
So you can buy them
In order
to feel beautiful,
Or feel raised to the set
standard of
beauty.
Don't get it twisted.I'm not saying beauty products are bad,no.Just stating their marketing strategy.
We stopped asking questions
Because we were too afraid to
Know the answers.
For it is quite easy to be happy when things are good.
But to be Joyful through the tough times this is God's doing.
It is easy to be strong , when you been working out all the time.
But to be strong on the inside that you can not work out here,
Now this is not your doing but Jesus through the Holy Spirit.
It's easy to be brave when you have the odds on your side here.
But it's Christ doing when you are all alone yet you are still brave.
Because you know that if God is on your side who can hurt you.
For only Christ can give and show you Great and wondrous Miracles.
if tonight's your last
and yesterday's past
intimidates you or
relentlessly accuses you
of the things that
once enchanted you
and you take a slap in the face
you cut to the chase
there's no time to waste
but really you're stuck
you feel out of place
and the rhythm of the sorrow
drags into tomorrow
because you cannot forget
and there is abundant regret
draining from the scars
that you've tried to hide
that you've put aside
and in reality, your soul
IS TIRED
of waiting, of praying
of feeling like it's straying
you breathe, you sleep,
you live as if you
were not dying
you're still trying
TO BE OK
but you are broken and
you cannot cope
and all of your hope
has gone up in smoke
to where has your spirit flown?
LET GO
for the love of God, release
give it to the One you seek
to Him whom your eyes have not seen
in this moment, you are
FREED.

© Melissa Carlson 2015
I remember a time some summers back.
Brother and sister climb into the bath tub,
bathing suits on,
ready to relax and have fun.

Brother wasn't always so nice to sister.
He yelled things, terrible things.
He hit hard, awfully hard.
He said he didn't know his own strength.

Sister doesn't know if he meant physically or emotionally.

But that day was good.
It was a day of sun and water.

Brother wanted to see how long sister could hold her breath.
So she went down.
Underwater where the sounds echo and distort.
She waited.

Sister came up a half minute later.

Suddenly, brother pushed sister back under.
Sister had barely gotten a breath in.
Sister waited a few seconds.
Then it got hard to breathe.

Sister pushed her brother.
Started pushing
against his arm.

Sister cried:
"Brother,
let
me
breathe."

Brother released sister's head.
Brother laughed at my tears.
Brother scoffed my fear.

Brother never said "sorry".


Today, years later, the story is the same.
Only now,
the water is depression
and the brother
is
my
family.
Unfortunately, this is a true story. Wish I made it up.
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