They look at me
through their worn down features.
They've got lines
all over their faces
each a mark of frequented emotion.

Their suits are cut to perfection,
or else they haven't showered in months.
It doesn't make a difference,
this type of man...
are all the same in their bones.

They want my freshness,
the smooth touch of my skin,
the soft curls and curves
that haven't yet been worn rough by age.

They want the twist of my smile
my brightness, my beauty.
They see
untamed, unharnessed, naiveté  
sparkling in my eyes,
and they want it.

They want me to make them happy,
and through our word play
I can see it in their eyes.
The longing, the lust, the belittlement.

The twist of my  smile slowly drops down,
The sparkle in my eye sizzles out.
But my brightness?
It burns hot.

I am not naive, I know that you want me.
I am not yours for the taking.
My brightness burns hot,
and I will scorch you to your bones.

(Parents, raise your sons right)

around and around
the blade-edge of the dark

a sealess white gull?
or a still, silent lark?

a lump down in the throat
sinking up to the knees

lashing out with a lie
yet praying for a please

around and around
at the edge of the dark

a drowning sailor.

or a circling shark.

Do you agree with me when I propose
Perhaps we did this whole love thing wrong?
Have we done what we said we never would?
Is it just me, or did we?

Did we forget certain promises we made
Pinkie swears with fingers crossed behind backs
Oaths written in blood were just red pen
And now we meet our crossroads

We turned left when the sign read right
We disregarded the map to follow our own devices
Lust swayed us to and fro in moral crises
But yet I loved you so

Fingers wrung with selfish grief, in all our disbelief
We stop and stared as if to ask what is next
But both our minds went blank
So we paused aimlessly

What is next, what is next?
Pacing, racing, pounding chest
Do we leave? I do believe
I can’t see a you without a me

We just fell through, I’ve now come to
The smelling salts have done the done
And now I see, we’re not we
And I can see you’re not the one

Now we’re here, and I do fear
I still feel what lies beneath my shell
My heart beats for you, but I say adieu
Because I still have to love myself

And I've lost focus of everything...
That matters anyways
Because the image of your lips
Softly trailing from my neck
To hers.
Is too engraved in my mind.
And I wish your lips
We're still engraved on my skin,
But the light brush work has
Worn off.
And now all I have is his lips,
That always feel like rocks
Probably from all that whiskey.
We've both had too much.
I just can't stop drinking of you.

There are some things
I don't think I'll
ever tell you:
like how I
shook
on the bus ride here
and planned my outfit
five days in
advance.
I won't ever
tell you because
you won't ever
need to know.
You see,
once we were actually
face to face
everything just
clicked
for the first time in
far too long.

I didn't get an
opportunity
to consider falling
for you,
it just happened
like missing
a step in the dark.
And I didn't get a
say
in the matter
but if I had I
don't think I'd have
fallen
any less hard.

I've never believed
in forevers
but I'm ok
with the possibility:
I'm ok with
just this one sunset
out of all the
millions
gone and
yet to come,
just this one sunset
with you
next to me
singing out of tune and
everything
surrounded by
water.

Get lost with me.
Let's forget about
time,
I like it best when
none of that matters.
You say we've got
all these hours
to **** but
let's not waste them
because it's
one more hour
with you
and I don't know when
I'll get another.

I am hanging on the
ends of the words
you don't speak,
searching for something
in our eye contact that
may or may not
be there.
Because
like I said
I don't believe in
forevers
but I sure as hell
believe
in the chance.