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It was a long time ago
I still love you though
I want to grow
But you're holding me back
Keeping me off track
Every time I try to let go
It makes my heart crack
I'm afraid of breaking
But you left my heart aching
~26/3/21
I used to have a crush on someone but we moved away and it's kinda hard forgetting him.
Bells ringing and jingling
Not knowing what it's bringing
Slowly descending into insanity
Stop this sound, stop the inhumanity
Ears bleeding
Keep pleading
Don't let the bells be misleading
The sound is exceeding
On your knees crying
You'd rather be dying
The sound of pain
Driving you insane
It shall remain
Implanted in your brain
~25/3/21
I hate being me.
I wish I was anyone else.
Someone who didn’t gain 20 pounds
in a year, who can handle normal every day ****.
Someone who doesn’t pull out their hair
and force bald spots that can’t be fixed.
I wish I was skinny and pretty and happy.
Fun to be around and brought light and joy to others.
I wish I had friends that went to the gym with me. Go on walks, and eat a light lunch.
Then smoke ****, drink and take molly at night.
I wish I could work as a server at a cute restaurant that’s close by. No want to go to college or have health insurance.
Just somehow live a quiet happy life with a man that loves me and only me and I adore him.
Why did I get this life?
Why am I being punished?
I hate myself.
So many days go by
There goes my toilet paper supply
Why am I so bored?
Another day at home, Oh lord
I feel like I'm slowly descending into insanity :)
Even the truest of intentions
Can be burned to the ground
Powdered sugar
It's raining white
You look absolutely beautiful tonight
You set my nerves alight
A burning fire in your heart
Enough to tear me apart
The delicate flakes coming down
Softly resting on your crown
On your delicate hair, a curly brown
It's snowing all around
They land softly on the ground
Without the slightest sound
~25/3/21
Oh wandering soul
What is your goal?
Why do you endlessly patrol?
Go to your peace
Death's sweet release
You have pried enough in the present
Go to where things are pleasant
For you have died
I am here, your guide
~25/3/21
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