Today it rains like never before,
It wears grace and pain;
It feels like a woman.

The cruel abyss of my cavernous
Heart wears violent black flora
In the furrow of my deep grief.

On this day no one has asked for me,
I pray to God and ask forgiveness
For how little I have died.

This mortal crusade that fasts on emotion,
It wears me like a fleece of flesh
That weeps softly at the soliloquy of me.

I wish I could beat on all the doors
And find good behind anyone,
But I soak in a puddle of self pity.

Destiny has seen to my downfall,
The backwash of suffering welling
Into my soul, today it rains as never before.

In my life, I had my many struggles here on the earth.
I had my fair share of issues as well here as well God.
I am by far , undeserving of your Faithfulness Lord.
Yet still you are so Faithful to me my Lord, thank you.
For you the Christ nature is Faithfulness completely.
Even though at a drop of a hat we can be unfaithful.
You shall remain Faithful even then to your people.
For its who you are and what you do , is remain Faithful.
So you whom spoke this planet into being Lord God.
Always deserves our Praise and Worship O Faithful Savior.

voice calls gently in the night
dreams awaken lucid flight
gazing from Orion's shore
Angels open Heaven's door
shadows cross the face of Mars
lovers count the falling stars
Sun evokes a gentle breath
to mark another twilight's death
awaken dreamer to morning's light
dreams rest silent til birth of night

The snow set in the barn,
Where the horses once laid
On a cold night, ice spiraled
We tossed,turned, all packed

The troops tamed to acquiesce
Rifles silenced, bullets sacked 
Stocks in deficit, awaiting ambush
Sores overturned and edged in holes

Our nerves dead in the silent night
Risking an aching machine, a body
Pushing to extremities, thrill seeking
My mind numb, body ignited in dumb

Left, right… series audibly recurred
Halting to reflect the extreme valour
A salute to quench and honor a reality
For I once sacrificed my "liberties" for "others"

When the camp counselor told us at age five
"Go take your night meds!"
I never thought that eleven years later
I'd be sitting in bed
Wishing that my remedy
Was holding me tight

Do you know
That you
Are a drug?

You're my marijuana.

I don't know whether to use you as my vice
Or as my healing.

Choice, choices....
And you don't make them easy.

******, the pain is worsening......
So do I medicate?
Or do I ignore the pain in my chest
And deal with the withdrawal......

No.
I'm not
That strong.

What we shared today wasn't just a hug....

It was a surprise.

I came into those arms expecting a brief enclosure....
And received stone walls that wouldn't let me leave.

Do I like being closed in, do you ask? You think I'm claustrophobic...because I pulled away?

If only there was more time.

Close those stone arms and take me captive.

I wouldn't mind at all.