still i cant see
why you'd lie
you know were both wrong
and i know this time,you will come back
this time i wont go back
this time i wont crack
i wont let you slip in my broken edges to fill me like glue
to hold me together and make me new
i want to feel the raw pain of being torn apart
i want to feel what its like to get cut

a god of his own
ripping the world up to shreds
wreaking hell
bringing havoc
metallic punishments,piercing the air
pulling the pleasure out from mortal wounds within
who will judge the ungodly or godless
bound to loveless and unloved
dying just as he was

i feel so alone in red heaven
sweaters and black jeans galore
i bared my red face
as i went out of place
and hopped over the fence at the grocery store
my red bat fell straight to the ground
they all ducked and run as the hellion was found
right outside of the store
in red sweater galore
i returned my baseball bat
they laughed as i filled up my hat
with red sweaters and black jeans galore
i opened my eyes to blood on the floor

thank you
you held my hand as i cried
i sobbed,
"she lied,she lied,she lied"
you could feel my shaking breath
and feel how i wept
i felt gone i guess but you stayed
you never remember my name
but you stayed through my wave of pain
to make sure i was okay
i let the entire office fill with my rain
drowning them all in my ocean
but you floated
i appreciate that
you could have just left i'd have been fine with that
but you stayed
and you saved me
for another day.
thank you

i stopped writing
because
the well was so full it overflowed
and the trees were killed one by one
i felt finished and defeated just as the rainforest fell
my heart is like the well that is now
empty,a hollow shell
im now half full instead of half empty
i see things without my eyes
my heart is dying rind of an orange
the mold poison you see
my hands are just legs of a spider typing and weaving its words
im no longer part of a person
im just a part of this world

you promised to take me to the moon
i promised to take you to the isle
i brought you flowers,i picked on my own
you brought me a smile and words to hold
worlds apart even so close to home
i cant exactly hold your hand in my space suit
and besides i live in space
you can't love an alien

they ask me
do you want to get better?
do you intend on bettering yourself?
will you get better?
truth be told
i dont know
i've bit at my nails till the blood runs down my wrist
i've cracked all my bones till my knuckles were red
i've dug at my skin till i bruise
and no answer draws from the marks i leave
so maybe they should leave me alone
because i cant write the answer in skin and bone