you drink to fight off the world
i get high to forget what life has done to my soul
everybody has an escape from what they fear

dragons have dug their talons into me, dragging and ripping away my flesh
leaving new scars

lightning struck you, leaving a beautiful disaster in its wake
a disaster that has altered my view on breathing the air i do

I have reached a resting stop in my life long journey towards complete and utter happiness. I am drained, weak, and nauseous. I can't do a single thing in life without worrying about a consequence, a mistake, a fear. If I move on; will I be wishing I stayed? If I stayed will I forever be regretting my decision? I need to see the world, but I also enjoy some things in this life. I crave adventure, but comfort is easy to find and 'home' it is easy to call.  I want to see what life has to offer, but what if it isn't as glorious as people proclaim? what if I am not the person I believe I am? a unique writer who craves inspiring scenery? Or am I just a little girl who's been thrown around by society, mind so hazed that I cannot figure out what I truly desire? Life; it's a living hell - but with an open mind and no pessimistic outlooks, it can be a best selling book waiting to be written. I might have the ability and opportunity to be the Author, through terrors, tortures, and turmoil... I might be able to make my hell into someone else's hope. I just have to keep going, moving forward, and stop looking back and dawning on the past.

I watched you leave through the window.
Did you even think twice?
I bet not.

You used to be a sad, old thing,
Silent and fat, dangerously nice
Not even a clue.

But did you...did you know?
You certainly thought you knew me...
Mistake number 1.

But I, I made some terrible mistakes.
I needed you to see,
You became a friend...

And an odd friend at that!
Picking fights not meant for you-
Didn't help anyone.

And picking fights with me!
Until you knew what I'd do.
I thought it odd.

Polar opposites, but it worked alright.
The world seemed to move again.
Well, it was twirling down.

It was something that I'd never do,
Which is why you would begin.
Greedy, still, for a rich one.

You were told to close that window,
By maybe, your mother?
I know she hated me.

Or, just because you didn't need loyalty,
But numbers and numbers-another, another.
I wasn't going along!

You knew such, so you wanted me out.
I was the wrong one for that.
It tore me apart.

Simply, I was a gateway. A way
To become an insider...you rat!
Like all of the others.

I must say, rich-y, you fit well.
It's a blood-******* town.
We all hate each other.

But mostly, me, you see.
You didn't know I was down.
It's all happened before.

You knew that! I told you!
You just didn't have a heart.
I bet not.

Did you even think twice,
Before making a start?
I bet not!

Eyes are not just eyes.
They hold stories of futures ,
seas and forest trees. Takes
a few minutes for one to see.
Look in your lovers eyes. Take
a moment don't just observe
their eye colour. Search for
stories and lost history. Look
hard and you'll find answers
for unsolved mysteries. Scars
of the past. Gardens bursting
into life. You'll find hope ,
new beginnings and a cozy home.
And if your lucky enough all
you'll see will be endless
amounts of love* ~

People often say to me “I wish I could write like you.”
Which to some degree I should find humbling
But if only they knew the truth
That every time I touch the pen I'm afraid of what it might do
Behind the guise of self expression it takes possession
All defenses are torn a sunder in pain under its reign
And I am helpless to stop it
Like I would, even if I could anyway
Each tear in me is subject to its tyranny
I watch every sunset fearfully
As the veil of darkness falls
So do the castle walls
It is then that the pen will begin to possess me again
Coercing confessions of sin
However, as much I hate it
I abhor I love it more
I concede that I need it
There is a stink of distinction
Between me and this ink pen
Yet still somewhat synonymous
Whatever I hide under the surface
Determines its purpose
And it always serves it
Even if it hurts when
I bleed through this pen.

an abandon
orphan child
is light
thus energy
that ignite
the distant stars
one by one
created from
temperature
gas pressures
gravitation
dark matter
and
dark energy
space and time
a ball of light
is
what
created the universe

I CHALLENGE ALL OF HELLO POETRY!
Choose a song, you can choose it randomly or it can be your favorite song, or just a song that you like. Write a poem while listening to that song. You don't have to write about the song but just write what comes to mind while you listen to it. I do this all the time and its amazing how it changes my mood and my writing. Title the poem the name of the song and use the hashtag #CourtsMusicChallenge and I will take the time to read all of them and repost them and leave some love in a comment.
Do the challenge then repost this so I know you did it.:)