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 Jan 2015 Oliver Sireen
Q
I do things on my own
I begin and I succeed
I fix my problems on my own
I make whatever I need.

Recognize my talent
I am all I've ever needed
I am, in my lonesome, sufficient
What I attempt, I succeed at.

A decade later, that's your reason
For believing I had it all under control
For believing I had it all in  hand
While I struggled not to lose.

"You never needed help, you never asked
You did everything alone."
I never wanted help but I needed it
"I didn't know, I didn't know."

I am no longer self sufficient
I'm fighting just to breathe
I don't want help even though I need it
I never want anyone to see

That I broke my own cycle
I tried and I lost myself
My fortress is cracked, vulnerable
And I've no one to blame but myself.

I am no longer self sufficient
But I still won't ask for help.
Isn't it ironic,
how we tell others to stay strong,
yet we cant do it ourselves?
Everyone seems to think
I am the “master” at
solving problems but,
I can't even figure out
how to solve my own…
You hurt me most
When you hurt yourself
I understand how
When you feel pain
It can seem like
The only solution
But I want to fix you
Put you together
Hold you still, for
Every insult
You mutter to yourself
Feels as if
You screamed it at me
Every meal
That you skip
Makes me
Want to purge
Every cut
You give your self
Is a ****** tear
At my heart
The pain you put yourself through
Is not just a punishment for you
It ruins me
Inside
So I have to share in
Your pain
That has become
Mine
Remembering Sunday by All Time Low just came on, and I hate the memories tied to it. Hate them.
- - -
The title and note have no relevance to the subject matter of the poem itself.
- - -
Through the dark and long night
Into a new world
Away from the suffocating reality
And into my own that I control
Past the closed eyes
Despite a still body there’s an active mind
During the night rest
Until a bright sunrise
Till the next dark night
Throughout the day I will wait for sleep
o-o sorry tadly xD i couldnt do tacos
People always wonder
why do people do drugs?
Why do people smoke?
Because it's one of the only things
that will be there for someone.
Love disappears
People leave
*Disasters happen
and that cigarette
will always be there
waiting for you to pick it up
and feel the calm that sweeps through your body.
Across the table
Alongside the cups and plates
Beyond the crazy people
Since the dawn of time
Over the green hills
Around the tall tees
Amid the infinite sky’s
Lays a taco
Ready for Tadly to eat
Despite it being there forever
It somehow is still magically fresh o-o
HERES YOUR TACO POEM!!! O-O
Why do you do this to me
Make me feel weak
As if the world was crashing down
like im unable to speak
I try and move but I only fall
not to the ground but into your arms
I may say this but only to you
but I have fallen for you
maybe once or maybe twice
I cant make out the words running in my head
Yet I can only see the blur's that lay ahead
I can only see the perfect vision of you
You come by and like
****
My heart went flying into your hands
like a mist you went away
Carrying my heart as a prize today
Knowing one day youll come back and say
I have a heart and you may take it today
So maybe one day this will happen
or maybe in my dreams it will too
Today was the day I fell for you
1-27-15
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