Someone once thought my poetry was ****.
Scoffed at what I wrote about.
Truth be told,
it did hurt.
And I replayed their words that day letting it eat me up inside.
A part of me didn’t want to write anymore.
But how could I turn my back on something I loved more than anything?
It’s impossible for me to leave behind the very thing that makes me smile,
and in a way has saved me numerous times.
It’s my outlet when my head becomes too complicated,
and each breath feels like a chore.
I don’t write to please others.
I write what’s on my heart and what fills my brain.
If for some reason someone doesn’t like it,
than so it be.
I’m just being true to me.
And here I am,
still writing,
still breathing.

Scars only tell half the story.
Tears tell the rest.

Fallen onto the snow,
the memories can't be erased.
All the days I held you close
when the winds came blowing by.
Nightmares tried to rip you apart,
but I glued back the pieces of your heart,
forever hoping it would never crack again.

Then in fiery rage I was gone,
torn away from all I held dear
and the plans you and I had made.

I never prayed so **** hard.

Now the years have passed,
of course I came back,
and we tried so hard to start over again,
but it was never quite the same.
The love was strong and always there,
but everything and everyone got in the way,
and no matter how many times,
it never really worked.

And so here I go,
trying to find myself, somewhere else away from here.
I don't know if I'll ever come back,
I always did before,
and maybe someday we'll get to where we once were,

because...

fallen onto the snow,
the memories can't be erased.

In an ordinary world I would already be where I want to be.
The questions running through my head would be answered,
and I wouldn’t need to worry anymore.
But this world isn’t ordinary.
I’m nowhere near where I want to be,
but I’m where I’m supposed to be.
And never think that where you are now is not the place for you.
It’s just a pit stop on the highway of life,
and sometimes this pit stop is a long one.
And for some,
it’s leads us to discovering that maybe right here is where we’re actually meant to be.
It’s just how we see it that changes.

I’ve never been in love,
but I know of a love so deep.
And because of that I don’t need my heart strings pulled by another on this Earth.
God has my love and unlike anyone else,
it won’t be broken.

Are you reading this?
Ten out of ten you’re scrolling right on past.
My words mean nothing in the shuffle of the
others who are bolder.
But even if I yelled it out,
no one would bother to hear me.
The lines I write are everything to me.
And each one expresses what I cannot say in person.
If only someone else would care for them just as much.

You can erase me from your memories.
Not pick up the phone and dial those numbers.
Talk and talk and say all the right words to the people who don’t really know.
Those words never reach here.
Do you get how I ask myself if I’m the one all wrong?
If I’m apart of problem.
It leaves me hating myself sometimes.
You can’t hear the cries from where you are.
And you’ll never know the nightmares living in my head trying to chase me down.
I’m hurting deep inside.
And all you do is stay away,
dragging the pain a little further each day.