Khaniek

Khaniek Aug 2017

To Him..

I guess you're sleeping, I would be surprised if you weren't.
I'm sharing my thoughts with you. I think you care but I'm not sure. People say they care all the time and they really don't.
Maybe I'm sharing with you because you are so far away and it's easier that way. I don't have to see the shame or disappointment in your eyes.
Haven't heard your voice in a while and maybe that's a good thing. Because I honestly for whatever reason believe there is something different about you. I'm rambling. If you were standing in front of me I would be tripping over my words.
I feel like screaming. Just to let everything out. I am losing myself. I have no idea who or what I want to be anymore. I'm trying to see positivity but I'm clouded in despair and I don't know what to do anymore. I hate that I'm losing me.
It is so hard to breathe, I really don't want to be anymore, I don't care to exist.
I am unhappy.

#happiness #disappointment #shame #careless

Khaniek Aug 2017

She's Angry.

Love is a misused word isn't it?
Every time you turn around there is something more beautiful that attracts and distracts you.
Tell me where your love rest here?
This love that leaves you breathless, that tatters your heart with every intake.
It pales in comparison.
Honestly I'm sick to death of this pretense.
Saying you care with your tears whilst screaming in my ear the words truer than you admit.
I'm next to hating you. No, I think I already do. It isn't the fear of love but this love itself that drives me insane.
This useless anger I feel when you are near. I hate it which in turn makes me hate you.
Of course these words are empty, much like the looks in your eyes when you smile.

#anger #empty #hate #love

Khaniek Aug 2017

Petty

It's a constant beating in your chest..
The love that you confessed, the feeling now you are unsure of..
Is it tearing you apart slowly?
When you rest between her thighs, when she's close whispering in your ear, when she plays in your hair, do you feel it then?
The love you easily proclaimed; this is why I hate men..
That's not fair of me is it? I'll leave it be.
I hope the pulsing of your manhood after you've reached your capacity and the release you get be as pleasurable as any can be.
I hope it satisfies your never ending need to rest between the thighs of maybes..

#petty #lust #*** #love #lies

Khaniek Aug 2017

Is It Me?

There is something that bothers me.
Time and time again I've tried relying on friends but they no longer seem real to me.
It could be that I am not the person I should be and everyone around can see that..
Or it's them and not me.
What exactly does that have to do with my dreams?
Nothing really.
There is this emptiness in my chest that leaves me cold and often breathless and I can't help but to think it's because of them and not me.
Of course that doesn't make sense.
Unless it does and I'm completely lost again.

#lost #confused

Khaniek Jul 2017

Late Night Thoughts..

Captivated by your sincerity, I'm in awe of your heart. Poison drip from your lips, sweet still.
Come closer to this forbidden fruit, Take part and be satisfied.
Trust your touch and free your mind. Close your eyes and let go or grip tighter if you must. It's just us.
Me and you..

#lust

Khaniek Jul 2017

The Love I Seek

I close my eyes on sleepless nights and think of you..
I picture the way you sound,
Like waves crashing against the shore when you speak.
The way you smell,
Like flowers after a storm.
Someone amazing i would like to believe.
Never having met you I'm already in love..
Your mind will be the opposite of mine I hope,
If not it, it will be a repeat of that brokenness that lies deep.
Yes, you will be different from me,
We'll learn each other in ways unimaginable ..
We will seek love, trust love, worship love together.
You'll bow before Him and I will succumb to you whilst you depend solely on Him. Then and only then.

#love #god #hope #trust #worship

Khaniek Jul 2017

What Makes A Woman Beautiful

Is it the way her smile constricts your heart?
Or maybe her eyes sees deep within your tattered soul..
Is it the way her body curves? Bending the rules of physics drawing you deep with her junction.
What is it?
Could it be her long legs that distracts you from your journey? Do you lose sight of what's ahead because of them?
What makes her so beautiful???
When she speaks does your heart race a mile a minute?
Does her pouty lips leave you in a daze?
Who is she? And what makes her beautiful?
Do you care for her words at all?
Her mind, is that a factor?
Does it matter if her insides are broken and useless?
If she's unable to love, is she still considered beautiful?
Who defines her beauty?
Who does it belong to? You or her?
I'm curious.. What does it mean to be beautiful?
Why would anyone want to be beautiful..

#woman #beauty #beautiful