it confuses me daily that so many people are having ***
even at this very moment, i'm sitting in a book store
sipping coffee that burnt at first sip
where are they? in their homes? in public?
i'm avoiding it, not on purpose
that's just how its worked itself out
there in the moment with them its exciting
adrenalin in pumping and all thats left is to strip
yet i won't let it happen
i feel the rush and the chills but that's it
the closest i've ever got to feeling what you call '*****'
it all started with a cuddle
he said it best himself, don't cuddle, you'll catch feelings
no ****.
probably could have went a few more years
but he was drunk and all he asked was for me to stay
to cuddle
and that's what we did
all night
i woke to him in a slight sweat and it happened
i then knew what you are supposed to feel in those moments
after that, he messed me up
now i can't handle him grabbing my hip to move me out the way
he can sit too close and there it is again
what the hell?
and other people have felt this since they were preteens?!
i would burst
what i don't get is why it never happened again
other boys/other girls
kisses/bites/touches
no one makes me feel the same
that feeling is what has been missing
why i couldn't say yes
i feel nothing with them, so i sit there fully dressed
he won't get too close
it's funny because he doesn't remember us
we were laying nose to nose
on new years, what i wanted happened
we kissed in the mix of the dozen lips
we got home and yet nothing happened
i didn't want to take advantage of our blurred visions
one day i hope i get it
the feeling he gave me
he may never say yes
but i'll always have that feeling
**** demisexuality
It's not as weird as they say to feel nothing.