Just thought I'd write these few lines
Praying God will take this message to you
I miss you so, dearest Joy!
Words cannot express the pain
Locked within my breast
Those times we sat sipping black coffee and
Talking about God and the Bible
Listening to a preacher on TV or sometimes a cartoon
The scent of your cigarette blending with spicy apple candle
Later you graduated to a smokeless cigarette,
Then finally you became too weak to smoke at all
Or even drink or eat or move
Dearest Joy, I miss you so!
I try to laugh and smile and joke
To comfort Tim and Marian yet the ache remains in my heart
Tim says he sometimes thinks he hears your footsteps in the woods
Sometimes I think I hear your soft knock at our door
Or that the phone ringing will be you
Always you were so sweet and appreciative
Thanking me over and over for the simplest little things
Thank you, sweetest Joy, for the lovely drinking glasses you gave us
And that special card you made which said
"Until we drink together of that water in heaven"
Forgive me for the Hospice group, dear Joy
I honestly believed that they would try to help
Rather than just cheerfully watching you die day after day
Thank you, dearest Sister, for all the sweet little gifts
Most of all your friendship and love
So I am praying that God will send this message to you
Perhaps show us some glimpse of Heaven to comfort our broken hearts
We love you, Sweetest Sister, and always will

**~Hilda~

Spouting nonsense about hardship nonchalantly
Reaching for the sun that never came
Dimmed light poles were the only ones glinting like stars
Laughing at how silly that was but doing it on repeat
Feeling content with living that life

Knowing all this will be gone one day
Seizing every second while it lasts
Demurring all thoughts of deleterious inputs
It will only damage what matters inside

Let laughter be brought in
Tears of joy on lame anecdotes
Let the inner child in you come out from that chest
Let all wars be resolved by-
Shrouding papers, Cutting air & Throwing stones
Catching every raindrop in that heavy downpour
Hilarity at every moment when you’re with your friends

Despite its wonders enclosed by fatuous walls
'Boxes' are the entities of our translucent merriment
Creating that canopy out of our prodigious stronghold
We feel unscathed by the demon’s vice
We’re just the same
As we are inside

We converse as we may
Not thinking yet preached ingenuity
Of benevolence & truth
We somehow knew stained past
Couldn't be bleached out easily
Because some stains couldn't be  removed

And we are all  Mavericks

We don’t know perfection
We don’t strive for attention
They called us insane
We call it intuition
We belong to one body
With infinite traits of emotion

It’s alright to be different
Pay no attention to what they say
Because we are unique
*We enact the happiness that we create.

Burnt within his heart's agony
Forsaken by the moon
Bestowed by her eternal curse
He couldn't breathe
He's drowning in fear
The innocent he'd slayed
These dreams only made it worse

His prose structured constellations
Aligning to his onus
Reliance to the innocence that still resides
Wondering why the stars denied him
The hopes he had, diminished in an instant

"Why me!!?"
He growled with remorse
He didn't want this
He became what he hated
He became the vital source of hatred

His only solace was the sun
He once relented the only source-
That gave him light
Light of hope that never runs out

Staring at that silver spear
He picked it up, smiling
*And ended his life

a
wee
leaf fell
into a stream
as leaves are wont
to do.   the water carried it   away
it's boating to persue. the fragile
leaf then came to grief in a
swirling thrall, it's just not
fair, it said to air i did
not ask for
f
a
l
l


soulsurvivor
catherine jarvis
(c) october 6, 2014