I’m searching for an answer

Looking for a solution within
Every touch
Every breath

Asking questions I know I'll never answer
Or you
Alone

I don't know why
I don't know what makes this
I'm lost

Cement pulling me down
Drowning me in the vastness of the void
No choice but to watch the world disappear
Fading
No Answer
Black

gone.

You’ve given me hope
Not in the sense I imagined
But  none the less

I feel a sense of calm
Burning in my mind
Taking contol
Taking me away from myself

You give me hope
Your given me dreams
I know what I desire
I know what my heart says is true

You’ve shown me your light
You’ve shown me my life
I brought my own emotions out of my head

I can tell what I want
I know what I need
It’s not what I imagined but it’s here

The answer lies in the next step of our lives
And yet at the start
Keeping me glued together
Yet pulled apart

Why do I feel this way
Oh help me through this hell
You have brought me heaven

I am whole alone yet still broken without the pieces of my brain

.
A period
The end
I don’t want it to come
Yet I know it looms over

I don’t know who I mean to be
But I want to move past who I am now

;
A pause
But knowing you’ll continue on
Simply a break from reality

I know we aren’t as close
As we used to be
I know we fell apart
Into the sea

I know I should have been better
And done more for you
I know I feel it’s all my fault
But you think the same for you

We push through this abyss
Running from the pain
Hiding from our monsters
Not seeing our true potential

We are our own main hinderance
We hold ourselves back with fear
We keep ourselves innocent
This dark world that we hold far too dear

But through all the pain
Through all the hardship
We pushed through
And made it history

My heart is icing over
Yours seems to be to
When I think about tomorrow
What is see I hope is true

My heart is icing over
My love is becoming frozen
Our lives could be forever bonded,
But I am not the one you have chosen

My life seems to have ended
But I'll rise from ashes
My ego I've defended
But still my life crashes

I am trying grasp to answers
On why I'm hurting so badly
But when I look, I see why

Why do I still love you
After all that you have done to me
But when I look, it's still there

There's still a glimpse of hope
In what is left of what we have
I still can't let you go

After all I still love you
Although I never got the chance
To say it to your face

My heart is icing over
My love is becoming frozen
Our lives could be forever bonded,
But I am not the one who you have chosen

When Icarus fell from grace
The waves did not catch him
When you cast a glare upon my face
My hope began to grow dim

You crushed me
You destroyed my inner self
You killed me
You’re bad for my health

I thought I could love you
I was wrong
For once in my life
I thought I was in control
So just leave me with my empty soul

I grew up to trust you
You made me who I am
I thought I could be made new
But you were the slaughter and I was the lamb

But I’m coming back
I’m defeating who you tried to make me
I’m stronger than I was before
Back when you used to berate me

And now that life is different
And I’ve moved past
After everything you did
why do these feelings still stay