Gnawing at my tranquility
Chafing my marble surface
An agonizing feast
Of deformed and defunct emotion
Medley of past regrets and shortcomings
Laying stubborn eggs
That exponentially multiply

They do not come softly
But ruthlessly blister remnants of peace
Each an erupting bulbous membrane
That screeches at the edge of my resilience.

Why can't every moment be our best moment?
A culmination tumbling down of events and actions.
That makes it something so unique,
It'll never be again replicated.
No matter how much you try,
The pieces can never be put back again,
In the puzzle that time had crafted.

If not for hellopoetry
I would have given up
The writing was starting to take its toll
Left me emotionally exhausted
I was forced to take a break
For all my energy it had drained
Sleepless nights, endless lines
Trying to switch off my brain
Left me depressed
When sentences formed
A story I'd tell
About my life in hell
Sometimes dramatised to a new level
Sometimes I have seen myself become the devil
All my emotions that stain the page
The blood, sweat and tears
Written into each line
Left me losing moments in time
And for this writing became a crime
Didn't feel like I was utilising my mind
Until recently I realised this was the only legacy
I would leave behind
I've seen this art in a whole new light
Through words on a page, I've shown my fight
I've shown all my emotions, I have been totally open
Gave my all in every line
Sprinkled in a flavour of rhyme
If not for hellopoetry all I'd have is blank pages
A mind full of lines, forgotten in time
Took some time to unwind
And that is when I realised
These writings and I are bound for life
I've learned to embrace this now
Finally proud of all my works,
how has it taken me this long
To fall in love with this art
If not for hellopoetry
An appreciation I would never have tasted
And this whole community I've embraced it
Don't care if you love or hate it
It's made me make some changes
If not for hellopoetry
There are talents I may never have uncovered
Some of us are still so young,
Still, more room left to improve
The elder ones raising us up
Understanding a whole new love for this art
I once said These lyrics were written in blood
Straight from the arteries from my heart
That metaphorically speaking
I spread all I am, all across the page
Bled the led with what I felt  
So much heart into every verse
All this time it was never a curse
It was something special I've been gifted
To get all these thoughts out of my system
If not for hellopoetry
I wouldn't be here...caught within this poetic atmosphere

©2018 Written By Benji James

feels like putting my hand
on something sharp kinda day
invincible temporary, of course
fight the system on a february dawn

where the lamp's lambent spheres
bob in and out of existence
as the sunshine overcomes their presence

first kiss with you, like hands
dancing in the fires
trying to stay warm in the winter light
an ogre of a dream, a curse to be this shadow

compared to the glow of an angel like you

Crossing the bridges in life
Have led me to recognize
The bumps and *** holes
I thought were unbearable
Brought me strength to
Bear witness and fight
The next fight in my
Life is but a venture
Filled with my belief
To be the wonder of unknown
As I have grown in
His word I come to realization
Our Father has a plan for me
He has had it all along
My wonder is
Where will His plan lead me
When will He  take me home