The door kept knocking
I was afraid to open.
At the same time curiosity struck my mind
I peeped through the keyhole
And pretended to be bold,
But all I saw was silhouette.
A chill ran down my bones
As I saw an invitation slid through under the door.
I was bewildered as to who would send an invitation late this hour
addressed to my name.

I opened the envelope
And the invitation read
"I cordially invite you to the carnival of lust"
I took the invitation to my room
And left it on a table at the side of my bed.
I went back to sleep as I thought, the invitation wasn't for me.

I woke up the next morning
Thinking it was all just a dream.
But there I saw the invitation lying next to me.
I chose to ignore it as it wasn't something I would acknowledge.
But instead of discarding it, I let it be.

Once again a voice whispered,
Aren't you a little curious to know what it might unfold?
Just one visit won't hurt,
Just to be sure that it isn't what your looking for?

I was miss goody two shoes.
Never made reckless decision.
But then I thought why not?
"Maybe I should cut myself loose
I will go, just for a sneak peek".
I was sure it would bring no harm
I always kept myself alarm.

So I got all dressed,
And found my feet marching towards the carnival of lust.
I said to myself "I will leave before the rest".
Instead, till today Im filled with remorse.
For what I saw as the curtain unfold
Was not meant for my soul.
It was like a rollercoaster ride,
Not for merrymaking,
The carnival twisted my mind
I was not able to leave.
Now I pray for release,
For a carnal life I lead.

A letter to you is just words in a piece of paper.
To me it brought us closer.
I could hear you whisper,
Those words so divine
You transformed my mind.
Although I knew they were shallow,
Yet I permitted my heart to follow
Those words that numbed my sorrows.

I was gullible, you were intimidating,
Each syllable was captivating
With that letter you won my attention,
But for me it was a ticket to redemption,
To save me from those emotions
That had consume my thoughts.
So I believed in those words.

A spark was lit, seen on my face
I was filled with a warm embrace.
Only to find, it was for sunny days.
As the storm set in,
And the thunders raged
Each words slowly faded.
The letter was drench in my tears
As I watched you walk away.

I was young, so naive
I saw beauty in your eyes
Didn't know they will leave me dry.
You would say let's fool around.
In my innocence I thought you meant laughter and acting crazy
Calling each other silly names.
Maybe I was just too innocent.

I let you in too deep.
I kissed you with fiery passion,
Embraced your every action.
When you laid down your head on my bossom
My heart skipped a beat.
The butterflies in the pit of my tummy,
So strong I had to resist your lips,
Especially when you said you loved me, you needed me,
I believed.

The table turned,
I was just another,
A game meant to be played
To experience what it felt like,
Fooling around with me was a pleasure.
That's when I realised what you actually meant.
You said "you couldn't see me in your forever."
I wasn't your world
I was just an experiment,
to prepare yourself for what's to come.
I was left undone.

You called me old school
Just because I believe in purity

You called me old school
Just because I wasn't influence by social media to overcome my inferiority

You called me old school
Just because I don't swear or cuss

You called me old school
Just because in the midst of a chaos I remain Hush

You called me old school
Just because I believe in a deep sacrificial love.

You vanished in a blink of an eye
I was obliged to say goodbye.
I am an Heir to the throne
In this heart I called home.
Therefore no more compromise
Only sacrifice.
I do hope you chase your dream
As lovely as it seems.
I bid you farewell
as you journey through Tomorrowland.
I might be one of your fan,
No not a constant one,
Just one who waves from afar
and says
*"Do you remember me
I'm a piece of your forgotten memory"

I burst forth into a monster
Roaming to devour
The very soul that left me sore.
Desiring to destroy your hope
To chain you with disparaging words,
The very words that left me scarred.
To trap you in a pit pitch black
A darkness so tangible,
leaves you screaming for a way out.

But forgiveness came flashing to my mind
Difficult to pursue but worth the try
For I myself
Craves for a second chance of redemption
Therefore the only way was
FORGIVE AND YOU SHALL BE FORGIVEN

Let love burn all that make you falter

And lit a fiery passion

That will leave the mark of a victor.