i don't want to go there
ever again
I don't ever want to feel
that way...
because this time
it would be by choice
and I can't choose you.
you were curious
you were bored
very lonely
so you picked me
even though you knew
you couldn't hold me
long enough to let me feel you.
and maybe
you liked me
thought I was beautiful
and I even believe
you thought you loved me
...but really you just didn't want me to leave
to leave you lonely
and you didn't care
that coming back
didn't mean staying for you
...and that shattered me

all this time
I thought I was building up
to you

I have felt much more with you than I have felt alone
I have never been so alive next to another person
I breathe so well when you are near
And fall so open.
You don't even have to touch me
But I feel you
All over
Everywhere .
I feel how much you miss me
You holding me is my coming together
I am covered in your love when you look at me
Never stop looking at me .
Your hands give my skin life
Your lips make my being leave ground
You are beautiful
You are mine
I want to never give up on you .

"You were a moment . You are not beautiful enough, you don't give back enough to interrupt my solitude. "

Life is short
You don't want me or my love
So why waste my heart?
Don't you think I'm beautiful?
I'd think you'd love me enough to let me go...
If not I'll just keep coming back because you keep smiling at me...
It really changes your face,
First handsome then beautiful
You should really let someone capture it sometime.
I think it's why I wanted to know you,
Maybe I should have looked away,
But you smiling
Is staggering,
I couldn't,
I could never.

My mother and her mother lived lonely.
2. I want to be held without being held captive.
3. I keep trying to find reasons to lay next to you.
4.  I can’t bear feeling lonely when I am not alone.
5. I can’t make me love you.
6. Even the man I long for knows I am leaving.
7. I am scared you will understand me and I will no longer belong to myself.
8. My brother, is his father… their feet carry them the same.
9. I am scared that you will find my love inadequate
10. You will become wanderlust and realize I have nothing resembling a map inside me.
11. A part of me is simply yearning to take you in my mouth… these hands.
12. I am a woman who is vocal in my wanting.
13. You will not **** me voiceless.
14. I sometimes confuse your silence with leaving.
15. I don’t want our love to be synonymous with chains.
16.  I need you to love me gently.
17. I have come too far.
18. Leave me wild here.
19. I want you honest. I want you kind.
20. I am both goddess and human.
21. I think if I run fast enough I won’t feel you leaving.
22. My skin is wet with regrets for all the times I stayed silent. The times I tamed my hunger.
23.  I can’t remember the first cut that trained me to ache for those who don’t seek me.
24. I tell myself I don’t want the things that I am scared to lose.
25. I have not been alive when next to another person in years.

I am not soft
I do not know how to be beautiful
I don't know how to be half in half out
I don't know how to calm these storms that want to see you.
I cannot dim this light
or handle you gently touching me
I am not fragile
I don't know how to be small
You keep trying to place me in your back pocket
While I am trying to stand next to you and hold your hand
I am tired of preparing for flight at the beginning of every landing
I am tourist trying to create a home to come back to...
and I know we can't make homes out of people
but I want to feel it when I'm with you .
I want you to feel it when I'm with you
I want you in this when I'm away from you
I am no gentle woman
Some days I am walking contradiction
but my soul is always evolving
always extending out of this being... beautiful
And I want you.
Yes I want you.

You increase me.
You bring me quiet.
Your presence is peace.
You are what I meditate to embody.
You are river not beating down land.
Your lips are water caressing shore.
And still you are so full of fire.
You are all red room ...
And rich, smooth chocolate.
You are fresh earth
And bonfire.
I always want to end with you
Start with you
Give into you...
Coat your wounds with my laughter.
You deserve the calm you give to me.
... Please lie down your burdens,
Share your energy with me.
I'll lay it all out for you...
Forever will never be here
But this moment
Right here ...
Today ... with me is .
-Indigo Morrison