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Cobear 6d
If I keep taking these pills
They might **** me
But if I stop taking these pills
I won’t be here
Cobear 6d
Got so high
I forgot
To forget
Cobear Jul 2019
I walk around this room
With the devil on both shoulders
Cobear Jun 2019
I stopped taking meds today
Letting my mind run free
Moving too fast
And I can’t catch up

These voices control me
Running circles around my vessel
Taunting me
Screaming at me  
Killing me

Is this was pure insanity feels like
An uncontrollable explosion of infinite stimuli
Endless torment with no solution
  
I need to wake up from this nightmare
before one day I don’t wake up
When I stop taking my meds for depression it all comes rushing in at once. The thought of being so dependent on this medication kills me. It feels likes these meds **** the real me. I haven’t felt myself since I was 11 (when I started taking meds). Now I’m 21 and these thoughts and fears still haunt me.
Cobear Jun 2019
I tried to **** myself once
With a bottle of pills
And a mind full of voices
Swallowing two dozen
Everything was blurry  
My vision was gone
But my mind was clear
I saw everything I loved
I saw everything I hated
I was face to face with every insecurity
And at the same time
Engulfed in self love
Life isn’t appreciated until it’s gone
Cobear May 2019
If heaven is real
Then this must be hell
Burning alive in my own head
Awaiting the day
I can live without the agony
I’m not religious, but hell can’t be much worse than this.
Cobear May 2019
Skydiving with no parachute
Thats how I’d describe my depression
Constant anxiety and fear
Freefalling to your own demise
The feeling of pure helplessness
Knowing you are no longer in control

That’s how I feel on a daily basis
Not at the wheel of my own life
Depression escorting me to rock bottom
And trapping me in this loop of fear
I’ve always had trouble describing my mental health to others.
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