Today I am *****,
I want to be pretty.
Tomorrow, I know I'm just dirt

Today I am *****,
I want to be pretty.
Tomorrow, I know I'm just dirt

We are the nobodies,
Wanna be somebodies.
When we're dead, they'll know just who we are!

We are the nobodies,
Wanna be somebodies.
When we're dead, they'll know just who we are!

Yesterday I was *****,
wanted to be pretty.
I know now that I'm forever dirt.

Yesterday I was *****,
wanted to be pretty.
I know now that I'm forever dirt

We are the nobodies,
wanna be somebodies.
When we're dead,
they'll know just who we are.

We are the nobodies,
Wanna be somebodies.
When we're dead,
they'll know just who we are

Some children died the other day.
We fed machines and then we prayed.
Puked up and down in morbid faith.
You should have seen the ratings that day.

Some children died the other day
We fed machines and then we prayed
Puked up and down in morbid faith
You should have seen the ratings that day.

We are the nobodies,
Wanna be somebodies.
When we're dead, they'll know just who we are!

We are the nobodies,
Wanna be somebodies.
When we're dead, they'll know just who we are!

We are the nobodies,
Wanna be somebodies.
When we're dead, they'll know just who we are!

**** your harsh judgements
**** your blind predispositions.
**** all these emotions and
**** all this dissonance.

First you must define yourself
then you must refine yourself
but lest ye ever confine yourself
you must learn to realign yourself.

If you never look around you
you'll never see where you are.
If you never know where you are
you'll never be able to find your way.

**** this assumption that I'm in control
**** this stream of consciousness; it's a black hole.
**** all these words I cannot think to say
I'm so sick of trying. So sick of caring. So sick of being. So sick of giving.

**** all this ****; I wish it all away.
Though if it were away, I'd never be here to say:
"I love this life,
but at the same time,
**** this life."

Hello Self,

How are you?
How the hell have you been?!
Long time no see..
You see,
everything has changed since you were last around-
I don't even know where to begin.

How was it, off on your journeys?
Did you learn the secrets of another realm?
Have you brought anything back for me from that distant place
where you can go, but I oughtn't follow?

I feel like I don't know you anymore-
like I must get re-acquainted with a distant schoolmate:
Your face is no longer familiar...
You're so much taller than when you left
yet so much smaller than I seem to recall.

You once told me of your great plans. Your secrets. Your hopes. Your ambitions.
Your fears.. our fears. Our dreams and our fears.
It seems I've forgotten all but a few of these precious, irreplaceable things
but the ones I do remember I cling to with my life.

I may not embody what you had once hoped I would,
but I believe that the skills I've gained and the pain I've suffered
have given me the tools I've needed to endure this beautiful and abrasive life I've been granted
and to become the person that you see before you now:

I may still be young, at only 21, but that isn't to say I haven't experienced a lifetime.
I am indeed quite imperfect, but I don't think that is to say that I'm unworthy.
I have made mistakes, but those mistakes are partially responsible for my perspective.

I haven't forgotten you, my oldest Friend.
I welcome you back with open arms and a warm heart.

I haven't forgotten you, my oldest Friend.
I truly hope that you have also not forgotten me.

Psychedelics abstract One's viewpoint
and thus give One an opportunity
to learn about things in a new light
including and especially Oneself;

It makes good sense that certain schools of thought
would seek to stamp them out.
It also makes sense that certain people
wouldn't be able to work them out;

They open many doors and windows
not all of which are desirable; many are scary,
but many are valuable if only One figures out
how One can learn from them.

Be not
so very quick to judge Others,
for they suffer and struggle as you do.
Perhaps even more.

They may cope differently
than you are conditioned to,
by both yourself and others,
but empathize with them anyway.

Improvement. Progress
is what is important,
not how One goes about it
or which direction is "forward."

The array of ways
that make up your brand of 'Cope'
are not absolute truth-
they're a relative possibility;
******* act like it.

Yes,
they may inflict their own suffering
or undermine their own struggle,
but so do you. So do I.
That's part of what's called "being Human."
Get over it.
Don't make it worse than it already has to be.
That's called EVIL.
Evil is not how they COPE.
Evil
is undermining Others' coping with
their suffering and struggle.

COPE is SALVATION of the Mind;
that isn't to say it's always healthy:
I can think of at least a few Saviors
who died as a result of trying to cope,
but if Death scares you so much as to accept living miserably,
you deserve every ounce of discomfort that you could have precluded by finding a viable and sustainable coping mechanism that works for you, because it was developed by you, and only designed for you.

The responsibility is yours.
If you loathe responsibility,
fathom the irk of those who try to cope
with your infantile avoidance of it.

Title is a first chance at Bias
to make us feel more secure
in order to preclude discomfort

[work in progress; seeking ideas]

When someone says
"You've changed"
with a negative tone,
it simply means
you've ceased to live
the way they wish.

(Join in, my-
Join in, my Child, and listen...
...diggin' through
my old, numb Shadow)

Shadow's sheddin' Skin,
I've been pickin' scabs again.

I'm down, diggin' through
my old muscles, lookin' for a clue.

I've been crawling on my belly,
clearing out what could have been
I've been wallowing in my own
confused and insecure delusions
for a piece to cross me over
or a word to guide me in,
I wanna feel the changes comin' down,
I wanna know what I've been hiding
in my Shadow,
my Shadow;
change is coming
through my Shadow,
my Shadow;
sheddin' Skin,
I've been pickin'
my scabs, again.

(Join in, my-
join in, my Child,
my Shadow moves
closer to meaning)

I've been crawiling on my belly,
clearing out what could have been.
I've been wallowing in my own
chaotic, insecure delusions.
I wanna feel the change consume me;
feel the outside turning in.
I wanna feel the metamorphosis
and cleansing I've endured in
my Shadow,
my Shadow.
Change is comin';
now is my time.
Listen to my muscle memory;
contemplate what I've been clinin' to;
Forty Six and Two ahead of me.

I
chose to live and to
grow;
take and give and to
move;
learn and love and to
cry;
**** and die and to
be;
paranoid and to
lie;
hate and fear and to
do
what it takes to move through;
I
choose to live and to
lie;
**** and give and to
die;
learn and love and to
do
what it takes to step through.

See my Shadow changin',
stretchin' up and over me.
Soften this old armor,
hopin' I can clear the way by
steppin' through my Shadow,
comin' out the other side.
Step into the Shadow!
Forty Six and Two,
just ahead of me.

Seconds slither as if Years,
Minutes meander like Months,
and Hours can hover for Weeks.
Days become what's done with them,
while Weeks can feel like Hours,
Months move by like Minutes,
and Years tick as if Seconds.

Yet, somehow,
it all surely adds up;
so, seek they all count.

Mortality is Time
on loan from the Universe/Tao/God/etc.
As per the contract that is blood,
the debt is to be paid in full and collected for the All
by none other than Death: among the more loyal of entities.
(Yes, harsher loan sharks than Death do exist!)

Point is:
Live it up while you can,
whatever that may mean to you.

It's not about softening the blow,
it's about leaving an impact.
Preferably a good one.

Ultimately, that choice-
that responsibility-
is wholly yours to bear.

Would you trust you?
Would you trust me?

Thus must One
tread lightly, yet decisively.

Pay attention
to each and every second,
whether on the outside or in.

By patience and self-discipline
One may come to see
Out and In are really One.

A perfect circle.

Choose to live,
don't just *be alive.

Memories
are scarification
of the Mind;

Some scars are natural,
others are artifacts
of who One can be
at One's very best
as well as
absolute worst.

I find
beauty, wonder
bewilderment
and even
enlightenment
can be found,
even in that darkness,
even in that light;
even though, at times,
it's one hell of a fight.

Don't be afraid to die a little,
for the parts of you who die
fertilize the parts of you
who yet grow.
-
Habt nicht Angst vor 'nen bisschen Sterben,
für die Teile von dir wer sterben
nähren die Teile von dir
wer noch wachsen.

Waste not precious Time
teaching or learning from the Uninspired,
unless, of course,
you've taught yourself
how to learn by counter-example
(an increasingly useful skill in a world of e'er increasing n-values, One may add!)

care enough
about questions
to answer

and enough
about answers
to question

There is more to it
than can be described
yet, really, there is nothing to tell.

It is the most hidden truth;
you can go your whole life living it
and never know it by name.

Und dachte ich bei mir:
"Was ist dieser Duft?
Woher kommt er?
Wieviel kostete der?

Ah, mein Freund,
du riechst sehr
nach Anmaßung!

Wie heißt dieses Parfum?

Oh, jetzt sehe ich;
es heisst dein Ego."

Go out and do it
rather than just talking a mediocre game;
take risks, get knocked down, pick yourself back up, proceed.

Hone your ideas in accordance to natural law.
Try your ideas by the fire of reality.

Anyone can spew *******
Anyone can be idealistic
Anyone can be a poser
but it takes a special breed
to take definite risks
to maybe succeed.

Sometimes
all that's needed
is a good "*******"

Sometimes
all that's needed
is to give a ****;
yet, most of the Time,
the trick is not to

Sometimes
all that's needed
is a good ****

Sometimes
all that's needed
is a good "go **** yourself!"

Everyone is creative.
Everyone has talent.
Few are disciplined.

Sitting with Eyes closed,
feet crossed, relaxed,
with mind and hands open;

Within the Void of the Screen
of the mental Non-stimuli,
something so curious
begins to unfold:

The Mind,
when left alone,
will construct for itself
a sort-of playground of thoughts.

These thoughts are not the Enemy;
they are indications and signals;
they are residual reverberations
of higher-dimensional activity;
that is to say, if I may,
of a higher-dimensional Entity,
the physical shell of which is Body;
unto itself a Chapel of Sacred Mirrors;
Organs, Chakras, Emotion, Reason;
a Vessel for something Greater:
Thy Godself is there.
(hiding within the Chapel of Sacred Mirrors)
The Godself is there:
(within the Chapel of Sacred Mirrors)
Allow thy Godself
to become actualized,
all else shall fall into place;
though not before it has all
fallen terribly out of place.

Thy Path implies sacrifice;
Sacrifice not thy Path.

What do they mean when they say
"If you love it, let it go"?
I don't know.

Perchance they mean to say that if you love something, you should want it to take a life of it's own,
and not necessarily that which you would like for it to have.

Perhaps they mean that if you love something, you should let it be exposed to the world,
not locked up in a safe place for you to cherish in comfort and solitude.

What if they meant that if you love something, you should deprive yourself of it?
No.. that isn't the answer... unless, I suppose, you're a nihilist.

Maybe they meant to say "If you love it, honor it by not restricting it".
That's the interpretation I like to take from it:

If you like the warmth the fire provides,
don't smother it in the heat of the moment.
Step back if it becomes too overwhelming,
then return to it again when you make yourself ready again.
This is the most healthy way for you and the fire.

Love is not a possessive quality.
Love is a passive, constant quality.
Love is respect made incarnate.
Love is powerful, yet yielding.

Love is letting go of the personal desires you hold for that which you hold so dear.

Love is letting it be as it naturally is so that it can grow and be fulfilled.

Love is a solution to a problem we're born into: suffering.

Love is limitless, so why impose limits on the things you love?
This is a sign of true affection:
Letting it just be as it naturally occurs.

If it is truly "meant to be", it will happen if only you'd just allow it to.

Each of us possesses our own personal dialects.

Though many of us may indeed share a common tongue, perhaps even two or three,
each of us uses these toolboxes in our own, personal way.
A way that is constantly in flux.

Fluctuating from the inside, ideally,
but it can be imposed upon by various forces.

When we think,
our mind must fabricate
then it must translate that fabrication into language.
When we speak,
we must in turn mold and shape thought into a common middleground
which is then subject to interpretation
upon which people generally reflect
and can be shifted in their own minds
such that they now perceive differently
and thus interpret differently
than they once had before.

If done constructively, this is generally called teaching (if external) or learning (internally).
Destructively, it can be called brainwashing.

Sometimes it is more innocent
but it is often manipulated
by various people
for various ends.

One must fortify one's own interpretations
based upon personal experience
and ideally critical thinking.

Also,
One must realize the limitations of language
as well as the limitations of interpretation
before one can begin to cultivate
what may someday become an 'enlightened' perspective
that is to say the mind of the Sage;
the Shaman. The Teacher. The Student. The Buddha.
(To be continued)

As I think of the things
you so readily left behind,
I think of the ways
in which we are the same.

On some fundamental level,
everyone is a philosopher.

Many turn a blind-mind to their intuition:
Most simply seem to demand that other people think on their behalf
without questioning whether or not it's truly on their behalf.

So I say to make up your own mind:
Be not ashamed nor afraid to be your own philosopher.
Only you can ever know your reality. No one can dictate it for you.

"Finding Oneself" is either an excuse or a delusion;
an outright lie to Oneself as well as others.
One does not find Oneself; One creates Oneself.

The Creation process is abstract and arduous.
Some create better with others; others, better alone.
It is it's own reward; suffer it with a smile.