I think there are parts of our
lives that we can't possibly know
the meaning of until we are
months or even years removed.
                                                                    I'm
talking inconsequential moments
that snowball, gathering up value
over time. Then you look back,
and suddenly you are just
                                                                    so
surprised at how many actions
interacted perfectly, the necessary
amalgamation of happenings to
bring about one exact minute. I'm
                                                                    glad
to have had this experience the
second you walked up. At that time
I could never have possibly known I
would be here today. Never guess
                                                                    you
would have such an impact on my
life, knocking an avalanche into my
world, leaving me gasping for breath,
showing me what it means to
                                                                    exist.

I got a text today with news that was
     a long time coming.
But that fact didn't make receiving it
     a single bit easier.
Working in pharmacy is
     high stress
     low thanks,
Gotta develop quite the
     thick skin.
But some patients are different.
They become favorites,
     your smiles to them are genuine,
     you share hugs with them,
     your heart twists at their struggles,
     and you rejoice in their triumphs.
You come to love them.
The problem with that connection is,
     when they die,
     they take a piece of you with them.
You'll no longer
     see their name on your computer screen,
     pour their medication into a vial,
     have them brighten your day.
Working in pharmacy is
     high stress
     low thanks
But the worst part is when a patient is gone
     and you don't get to tell them goodbye
     or how much they meant to you.

You are, quite simply,
my most frequent thought. My lips
miss the taste of you
and my jawline aches for the
presence of your silken kiss.

I'm not that girl,
the one your parents warned you about,
the one that lets secret promises slip between my lips as I make you sigh in ecstasy
only to have you realize every word said while I was between your thighs was a lie, intended only to provoke reaction at the moment.

I'm not that girl,
the one your friends warned you about,
the one that lets a secret wink fly at them as I hold your hand tight,
determined to keep you close
until the moment you aren't enough,
not that you ever know you aren't my one and only.

I'm that girl,
the one you don't think exists,
the one that wants to wake up extra early
for the sole purpose of rolling over
to settle a gentle kiss upon your lips,
then stretch and rise to prepare
a breakfast for you.

I'm that girl,
the one that wants to you surprise desserts just because,
so I'm not the only sweet thing you have
to come home to.

I'm not the girl that will break your heart, lie to you, or cheat on you.
I'm the girl that will stand by you, no matter what, because I want to be the one you lean on in times of need.
I don't want to cause you pain, I want to help fix your struggles.

I'm not that girl, the one all the guys lust after.
I want to be the girl you fall in love with.

I want to run my fingers through your hair, swirl my tongue around the lobe of your ear in just the right way so that I know it will drive you the best kind of crazy.

I wish to wake up early, throw on one of your oversized shirts, and cook you breakfast. Each time I reach for something high up you'll see my secrets that you alone know, and I get to start your day off right, well fed in every meaning of the word.

Let me be the person you come home to, the person you reveal every secret wish and desire to, so that I may be the one to help you make them become real life.

I'd like to be there to gently kiss away all of your teardrops, and talk you through all moments of weakness and self-doubt, reminding how simply extraordinary you are.

I will devote my entire being to bringing you happiness in every aspect of your life.