You ripped out my eyes so I couldn't see the bad things about you.
You tore off my ears so I couldn't hear the lies you told me.
And finally, you ripped out my heart so I could never love again.
And you've kept it so you could always have me close.....

Why can’t I see?
What they want me to be
Why can’t I say?
What they need me to say
Because the more I go
The more I keep falling apart
I keep dying
Endless circles for what I’ve done
So if I keep going
If I keep falling
Will there be any hope for me?  
All I wanted to do
Was make a sound that could be heard
Not for every ear
Not for all to hear
But just to those
Who want to get through life
Who are done suffering just like me
Make me see
Just how eternal love can me
Please just ******* show me.
I go through loops and loops,
Constant hell, because I never learn
I never learn.
So will you die for me
Just so I can see
Die for me
So I can see
Cut me to show me that I bleed
This is my only need
Cut me, cut me
Cut me out!
I need this
I need this
I need this presence!
I need you in me!
Call to action
Bring the moksha.
Bring me peace.
I can’t take this
Day to day
I keep forgetting to breathe
Falling in the ocean
Failing at everything
So end this loop
And all that I know, baby
And bring me to a brand new world.
Rise me up like Lazarus
Breathe life into my bones
Recreate me,
Make me whole.
This circle of hell
Is so real that I can’t tell
What is real
What is fake
These walls keep closing in
Hold me closer, baby
Don’t let me fall
Shame is unforgiving
I know my past
What I am asking now
Is that you please, hold me up
Please, for god’s sake
Hold me up.
God forgive me
I just need this boat to float
God forgive me
I just need this boat to float
God forgive me
I just need this boat to float
Baby, help me
Make me see
Just how eternal love can be.
Make me see
Just how eternal love can be.

Today
everything
is standing
still
the sun
the sky
you on the other side
and I
still waiting
for you
still staying
for you
proving
you
don't have
to feel
the same.

I'm the monster clawing at the walls.
You gave me the taste for your blood and then locked me in here.
Your scent stains every surface in the room;
Tantalising but with no flesh to sink my fangs into.
Rabid dog-type wildness becomes me,
Transforms me into a thing driven by madness and instinct.
You are the prey with footprints but no body.
I am the predator never knowing satiety.
Pacing replaces hunting, I'm starving,
And your constant, elusive presence has me frenzied.
Viscera begin to litter the room.
Yours or mine? I don't know. I'm starving.

Sometimes it just needs to be said
*Im so tired

On the last page
They read the last line
The last word
Together
Goodbye
So it ends
But the next chapter
Is just a page away
But sometimes
It's just better
To not know
What yet awaits.

Flowers on headstones.
Vivid colours amongst grey
To brighten the grief.