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It's scary that one day,
*We might regret all of this.
We won't. This won't end.
8/30
Ask
I did my best to love you
But you've hurt me anyway
So I tried
To keep my heart at bay
I could have gone away
If you didn't ask me to stay.

But baby, at the end of the day
Things might change their way
Yet what will matter to me
Is what you say
I could have stayed
If you didn't ask me to go away.
Almost breaking.
9/30
Don't leave me alone in the house
For just like me the house refuses to function without you
The TV seems uninteresting when you are not there to watch it
Food loses it's taste
The taps refuse to co-operate
The curtains tease and torment me
The cat doesn't want to eat
For just like me he seems lost without you
The fans and the air-conditioner seem useless
For only you can calm the fire that burns my soul
The lights don't seem to work
For nothing is as illuminating as your presence
The house without you seems like a graveyard
So please come back
'Coz the bed just like my heart is getting cold....
He knew it was love when he awoke in the middle of a dream that felt like the answer to a prayer and he didn't care if it was god whispering the truth in his ear or the devil selling him a lie and he knew either way he would love her until this lifes last breath and find her again filling his lungs with the first of his next
Saying goodbye to you is like getting hit by a train;
Not because it hurts, but because it could mean the end.
The mortality rate of being hit by a train is 90%,
So I've decided that the likelihood of never seeing you again is like that.
There's a chance that I may say goodbye, and that will be it,
But there's also a chance that I may say goodbye and will leave only with battle wounds.
My last kiss with you could be so painful that it will leave me with scars forever,
Or it could stop my heart in its tracks.
I could hear your voice whisper my name in the dimlit dorm room one last time,
And feel all of the bones break in my body,
Or my spinal cord could sever and leave me just like that.
Either way,
I think I still want to take my chances,
Because scars fade
And bones heal,
So there's a 10% chance that saying goodbye to you,
Will not be my last chance to say it.
 Jan 2017 Unnoticed Notes
ab
why do you look at me
like that?

like i am something
you are about to consume?

i can see you,
you winked at me,
didn't you?

i'm scared of touch,
i curl away with fear
at the slightest brush
of the skin.

please don't make me explain
to you
how scared i am
to go near your house.

it's not you,
it's my fear of what come next,
it's my fear of letting you down.

i'm scared to let people down.

i don't want
you
to
be
disappointed
in
me.

i don't exist for your approval,
yet i am empty.

i'm so lonely,
i have been for ages,
but i'm tired of confusing my
loneliness
for dark nights,
empty promises,
hollow "yes"s
and cold fingers.

do
not
touch
me
do
not
kiss
me
do
not
hold
me

i
am
too
fragile
for
you

i
will
break
~empty intentions, i can see them in your eyes
I guess it's time
To put this ruby red heart
Back in it's ebony chest
Along with a few pearls of wisdom,
A piece of broken jade for luck,
And a bit of sunshine for the warmth he once gave
Lock it up tight
With unbending iron and fright
I'll bury it deep
Swallow the key
With the only treasure map tattooed on my sleeve
Where I used to wear my heart
That once did beat
Nothing more to say.
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