There's nothing left
so what is there to lose?
Guess I'm the left
opposing your right.
Every fight alters the light
that used to shine bright.
There's nothing like
a forbidden love,
a sordid spoiled fruit
you keep throwing up
until I've given up.
Your lies cut through my neck
and the effects
have caused another train wreck.
You make love
seem like a war that never ends
that no one wins
inside my head
you never get it,
it's pathetic.
You make love
feel like a drug
you only found
dug in the mud
and you just gave it up.
There's nothing like
a mind you redefine
to fit in between your lines,
a mind that uses time
consumed with parasites.

We were drinking coffee when
depression showed up at the door of the home we built, pounding.
Eviction notice in hand,
your soul parceled out into donation bins.
Foreclosure sign,
caution tape around the chest that I slept on for a year.

I sit out in the sun
to bleach the tan line from my ring finger.
I hold cold cups and shake strangers’ hands
to erase the mould of your grasp from mine.
I want to sear off my palms.

I miss even those nights when you looked at my fire and laughed.
So I make you coffee (but I know I make it wrong);
your ghost in this house still criticizes.

I made you coffee every day because it was all I could do;
my only way of getting into you, a vector.
As the hot brew flowed past your heart, I watched,
like a child at Christmas, hoping you’d feel my love.
Hoping the glaze would clear up from your eyes.

I only wish this were a bond that stayed,
that stayed when your mind put plugs in your ears:
when I screamed and screamed that I loved you,
that I’d rock every little thing you regret to sleep.

I went to the doctor about this dizziness.
He checked my ears, he asked why my eyes were red.
This vertigo--a hurricane made by the page turning in my life.
I am a bag in your wind.

The day you left I wrote you a recipe for how you like your coffee,
because you don’t know, but I have it memorized.
My handwriting changes halfway down the page, as I change,
as you drive farther and farther away.

Our love is a child I’ve carried,
now I’m bent over, sick.
Loss took your place in our home,
but it’s unsteady on its feet;
I have to walk it from room to room.

My name has been yours, possessive.
And although these days I correct myself and say ‘I’ during speech,
My thoughts are still ‘we.’
I still think about your lungs when I cough.

So I still make us coffee every day (but I know I make it wrong).

Your eyes,
Deception lies?

Too good to be true?

Scared,
So scared you actually exist.

Me,
Young naive?

Scared to believe,
Still skittish and broken.

Wonderful,
Oh how i feel in the morning knowing you thought of me,
Jealousy,
In the pitt of my stomach,
That i hope its only me so bad i could puke type feeling,
Desire,
To hold you close and show you what i can do,
To want you and everything that comes along with you,
Baggage and all
Pleasure,
Warm breath,
No sight,
One place to the next id kiss,
A cool breezy yet warm surprise,
Give you all i know in hopes to blow your mind,
Remember,
I want to be the woman you remember,
On your mind when you have a thought,
Resounding in your head type remember,
Going crazy in your bed type remember,
The caraze to hear my voice again,
The sensation to feel me next to you,
Unbearable,
An addiction,
To need me,
Involve me,

Control me?
In my thoughts i can hear you,
In my dreams they have become so vivid i can feel you,
Fantasy,
To picture your mouth move as you speak,
To wonder just how warm your breath feels,
To wonder how your body feels with mine,

You ask whats on my mind and this all becomes a flash,
And every time all i say is,
You.

Every now and then,
It drips
Like water
From my ceiling,
Until all I see is
The rain.

It follows me
Through the breeze
And sounds like the word
“Please”
Drowning me in shame.

I can still hear it trembling,
Like a lie
Behind clenched teeth.

A lie that no one can hear but me.

It waits until my skin
Finally feels clean,
And reverts me
Back to a time
That still tastes like seventeen.

I don’t want to remember
You in a place
You didn’t belong.

I don’t want to remember
Because no one would believe me.

But I still feel it here.

It drips like water from my ceiling.

It follows me through the breeze.

I can hear it trembling, like a lie behind clenched teeth.

A lie that only I can hear.

And it makes my skin feel *****.

You who goes by "Lonely"
Yes you, who reads these rhymes
Please pause here for a moment
I won't take much of your time

You see my friend, I'm lonely too
In the dark with paper and pen
So I'm writing you this poem
and signing it "Your Friend"

Though I'll prob'ly never see you
nor ever know your name
I do not need to see your face
nor know your cash and fame

I do not care what color you are
how short or tall or fat
I'm weary of all these parties and creeds
So, for a moment, forget all of that

Yes you, dear friend, forget with me
Inhale this moment serene
where we are not opinions or castes
Just two humans with two glowing screens

Be human with me, simple and pure
For a moment breathe deep and feel free
then should you have the time, and a halfway good rhyme
Perhaps write a poem for me.

Signed,
Your Friend

Dear Daddy,
Do you know what these men say to me?

With their
eyes and their mouths
when I walk on the street.

With a grin and a nod
and a look up and down.
A wink and a kiss
and a cat call heard from downtown.

With my skirt short
and my top
low,
It’s a cold world daddy
and no
doesn’t mean no.

Daddy do you know
how these men look at me?

Like I’m a piece of meat
strutting down the street?
With my head buds in
and my favorite song on.

I’m asking for it Daddy,
I’m in the wrong.

Do you know how it feels
not to wear what I like?

To walk a little faster
when I’m alone at night?

Daddy the world is my predator
and I am it's doe,
Daddy what happens
when I can’t say no?