I wander our old lives, I take the train I always took to see you, I pass the pancake place we never went because it was always too busy at brunch time,
and the teriyaki place we went instead that was surprisingly good considering it's emptiness.

I see the Kia dealership I waited in front of, not knowing you were waiting for me a block away on a charming main street.

I see the Mexican treats place where we got deliciously odd flavored paletas, and the pirate golf where we ate mediocre pizza and giggled at cheesy glow-in-the-dark pirates.

But you are not here. You do not greet me at the transit center.

While I revisit old memories, you are exploring our future. You are walking streets we may walk together. Perhaps you are passing restaurants that will become our favorites, a park where a momentous decision will be made, the locations of disappointments and joys
yet to come.

Despite the traffic and obvious signs of habitation surrounding me, this place is a ghost town to me.
It's not for me anymore.

My present is a limbo between nostalgia and anticipation. My future is with you. I'll join you soon.

Have you seen it snow,
the light it shows?
And the people go,
very slow,
to turn their heads
and see it snow.

the woman in white said to me
“have you not learned?”
she picked up my thoughts with her hands
and held them away from me
so that all that was left was a blank, white, light.

look up at her, holding my thoughts
never realized you are limbo itself
when you reside there

she said
“be here!”
and threw my thoughts back down on me
suddenly i was lying on my bed
one leg under covers
one leg out
cars zooming under my window
sun barely peeking through my blinds.

Hearts filled with glorious candor upon perceiving it..
Skins gladdens upon it's rays..
Nature is rejuvenated upon it's sparkle..
It envelops the vast gloomy soul into a singulate bloomy hyperbole.

Sleep in the eyes,
Hunger in the belly,
Straying memories augmented with dreams,
Striving to relegate the soul into a limbo.
The fire in the soul strives to keep it alive..

my eyes close
and i fall,
it's dark,
there's no floor
or ceiling,
no alpha
nor omega
like God,
but i wake up
and forget.

They were opened,
Revealing a world in constant motion,
Colored and coated with this commotion,
Gripped and grabbed by the chosen,
Opened, but blinded,
Taken and tried, ignited,
A time before, I didn't mind it,
But now I mind it

I was better together and intact,
But now I wonder if I have even my own back,
Always feeling so stuck in this reality,
Confined, is this how it's supposed to be?

Feels like a day that lasts forever,
Losing time, guess erase the never,
Where did my mind go, lost my sanity,
Could I do anything to finally be free?

Could it be any better, I always ponder,
Maybe this is a test disguised as a taunter,
I feel it's getting harder to clearly even see,
Feelings confined in things that used to be normal to me...

Straight lines

Some curves


Straight lines

get you there faster

Curved lines

show mistakes
show loopholes
show limbo

Every single one of
our lives

have always
will always

be curved.

We must learn to tread
with these mistakes

We must learn to find
these loopholes

We must be willing to be
in constant limbo
in constant darkness

in order to reach the greener side.

being awake at 4 am
I thought of everything
and yet nothing was in my mind.

I looked out the window
at a world half sleep
dreaming and still dreamless.

everything was timeless,
a world hung in-between
everything and nothing all.

I existed,
and yet I didn't.

yesterday had gone
but today wasn't here yet.
so where was I?
who was I?

I was meaningless
but I could still be defined.
I was everyone and everything,
and yet, no one and nothing.

for in those moments,
I was infinite.