Don’t be afraid my darling.

There is no false hope in the tenderness of my touch.
I carry the weight of truth in my words,
and I have no intentions to bring harm to your heart.
Your being is safe with me.
You’re free to conquer your fears and take the leap.

We were standing still, you armored in my arms.
The stage in front of us was brightly lit
but the faces around us I could not see;
we danced while the world revolving around us changed.
I whispered song lyrics in your ear and
your body language prompted me to hold you closer.
So, I did.
For a moment I was sure you were in bed with me
because the air around me smelled of you.
Lost in your fragrance,
I didn’t notice the scene around us change.
Even in a new setting the only person
my eyes could adjust to was you.
Beautiful Woman.
You turned to face me and lay your head gently on my chest.
All while I wore a coy smile.
I felt your hand on the back of my neck
as you raised to the tip of your toes to kiss me.
Just before our lips met, I woke up.
You make me nervous, even when I dream.

A collection of brilliance in moving parts.
Galaxies of stars painted green and blue rest in
perfect circles upon the gentleness of her face.
A woman who carries power in her voice,
one who demands your attention upon entering a room.
Her giggle so darling it commands the affections of men pursuing her heart.
You hear intelligence in the way she speaks,
see pride in the way that she walks.
She wears her confidence like a talisman around her neck,
her personality draped along broad shoulders.
The woman has kindness in her heart,
the capacity to bear love in her bones.
A strong spirit, unique, passionate and bold.
High cheek bones with a full smile.
She’s got mystery webbed in the danger of her desires.
The true definition of beauty lay in everything that she is.
One must thank the Heavens for creating a woman such as this.

I may not remember everything that you ever told me,
but I do remember the important things.
Don’t lie, cheat, or steal, don’t ever be afraid to stand up for yourself,
and don’t ever let anyone tell you that you can’t.

I remember when I was kid I would get upset because I was the last one to be picked up from basketball practice,
I was so embarrassed because it would happen every time.
I didn’t realize it was because you were working to provide a life for us.
Thank you.
Do you remember when we moved to Kentucky?
You were so excited about your new job,
I still have that newspaper clipping from the interview that you did.
It’s in my box of things that I never want to forget,
I’ve had it since I was in the sixth grade.

Remember when I started to high-school?
I gave you hell right off the bat.
Smoking cigarettes, getting suspended, letting my grades drop.
But you never lost faith in me.
You were the only one.

I remember seeing you drink Zima as a kid.
I remember that time I fell off of my bike into a cactus,
you spent hours picking the spines out of my skin.
It hurt so badly but you told me that everything would be okay, and I believed you because you made it so.
I remember when you first got cancer, it was spring and I was three weeks shy of 16. You told me on April Fool’s Day.
My heart knotted when I learned that it wasn’t a joke.
Shortly after you left your job and things got rough
but I’ll be ****** if you didn’t make a way.

Phenomenal woman.

I remember when I came home from the Marine Corps. recruitment office, you cried because that’s not want you wanted for me.
Lucky for you I have a tattoo on my neck and wasn’t able to enlist.
I remember when you kissed me on my forehead and hugged me after that girl broke my heart.

I remember when your cancer came back,
this time in a different spot.
I don’t remember hearing you complain about it one single time.
Around that time your eldest grandson was born and you told us that was your reason to fight.
That boy loves his Gigi.
I remember the Christmas after that, you were so sad that you didn’t get us big gifts, but having you there with us was the only gift we needed.

I remember when you beat cancer for the second time, I made you a cake and hand decorated it,
it looked like **** but you loved it anyway.

I remember your smile.
I remember you being my support system when everyone else questioned my life choices.
I remember how much you loved me.

I remember when your cancer came back, the doctors here at home said they had already done everything they could for you.
They told you to accept your fate.
But you kept fighting.
I remember taking trips to Philly with you,
you were getting treatment there and I was to go with you because I was your primary caretaker, I even withdrew from school
I knew that taking care of you was the only thing that mattered.
Remember when I was a kid, and I was hospitalized with the chicken pox?
You were my safe place and you never left my side,
that’s what I intended to be for you.
I remember your final days, family and friends came from distant lands to say I love you one last time.
I remember the last thing you said to me.
I’m going to keep my promise. My heart of gold will never tarnish.

I remember the high-pitched laugh that would come out when something really tickled you.
I remember your spirit.
I remember that time you had one too many apple martinis, you never drank again after that.
I remember how mad you got because I kept getting tattoos.
I remember how happy it made you to call me your son.
I remember you demanding me to come over every time I got a haircut, simply because you wanted to see.
I remember always having you in my corner.

I remember you.

Imagine meeting someone who wants to learn your past.
Not to pass judgement or use it against you,
but to understand the ways you need to be loved.
Maybe we’ve crossed paths, maybe I have yet to meet you.
Regardless of the circumstance, my promise to you remains the same.

I promise.

There will never be a moment when I don’t love you with my whole heart.
I won’t ever stop choosing you.
Your happiness is priority number one;
I’m sure your smile has the ability to make me weak in the knees.

I promise.

To continue to challenge you to challenge yourself.
Together we will work to become the best version of we, that we can be.
You won’t ever feel alone.
I vow to be your strength when you can’t find it in yourself to carry on.

I promise.

You will always be protected.
God as my witness I will not let any harm come on to you.
Comfort and safety is what you’ll find wrapped in my affection.

I promise.

To love you the best way I know how.
And tell you how beautiful you are, every single day.
I won’t ever stop adoring or learning about you.
And when we’re 80 I’ll still look at you with the light of love in my eyes.
Our conversations will never come to an end.

I promise to love you, even when you hate me.

I promise to stand by you, until my dying breath.