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He may be twisted but deep inside,
I believe lies a man full of pure love and affection.
Grounded, surrounded, bossed around,
But sets me free into his safe arms.
As if fear drags us apart.

I was so blind, but now I see.

Now he's gone, but within I stay,
Regrets after regrets,
Are drowning me.
...
I remember the smiles he caused to be,
All the happiness flying through the soul inside of me.

But now you'll see it's not only me.

I'm glad to have seen, before letting go.
Regrets after regrets,
Cause' its crystal clear.
...
Saving what I have,turns out not fear.
I say thank you because it's all your fault.

Don't let what's bad blind your eyes,
It'll take your love , without your feel.

By: Zoulaikha
I found Aladdin’s lamp on the floor
I picked it up and some smoke came out
A genie started to appear between the smoke
And said:

‘I grant you three wishes, use them wisely;
Where do you start, with this powerful gift?
I grant you three wishes, choose carefully.
What can you fix, what can you change?’

I still couldn’t believe what I saw
I was creeped out and surprised,
Excited and satisfied
Everything seems to be so magical

I wish,
I wish

Can world peace be achieved simply?
A single thought fixing that’s all
Changing hearts, minds and history.
All in a single wish?

End hunger
Share wealth and resources;
Make crops grow, control nature, end greed?
All in a single wish?

Can we cure all ills?
End sickness and pain
Change lives; give hope?
All in a single wish?

Because without hope,
Without an urge for change,
A drive to better,
How can we make our wishes come true?  

By:Zoulaikha
I've never gotten flowers, not much to say
In love once, still can't beg to stay
I've never gotten flowers, but oh.. to dream of lilies
How the return of happiness will ever feel?
"Hold onto your baby breaths,"
They never given me any
All I ever wanted was a tulip
The same way my father use to gift my mother
Smiling while I hide behind him excitingly

Dreaming of  my once upon a dream as snowdrops grow
Sunflowers, how beautiful they could be
Joyfully restoring oxygen into my lungs
You never knew cause roses are the trend
Honestly, you never asked
Left, right you're gone
Not a rose in graved, they're all out of sight
Its alright I'll get gladiolus
Swimming in the lilies valley one day

Memory, Not a Flower girl

By:Zoulaikha
writing this was something I felt like it needs to be heard. I also played around with the meaning of each type of flower..
Lilly: purity, heavenly, happy, wealth, pride.."but oh.. to dream of lilies
How the return of happiness will ever feel?"
Baby breaths: everlasting love... ""hold on to your baby breaths" They never given me any"
Tulips represent respect, sunshine in your smile, passion..."The same way my father use to gift my mother"
Snowdrops: new beginnings, hope, rebirth and the ability to overcome challenges..."Dreaming of  my once upon a dream as snowdrops grow."
Sunflowers: long lasting happiness.."Sunflowers, how beautiful they could be"
With roses I went with how common they are but even tho they mean I love you:  "You never knew cause roses are the trend ,Honestly, you never asked, Left, right you're gone, Not a rose in graved, they're all out of sight"
Gladiolus: little sword as in strength ..."Its alright I'll get gladiolus"
Lilies valley: joy, love, sincerity, happiness and luck but also the lily of the valley contains compounds that affect the heart since it poisons...so if I win and gain my strength I may be at the end finding happiness at my last breath.."Swimming in the lilies valley one day"
Why?, why is Pluto so cold?
Have you ever wondered..

Pluto understood but been misunderstood,
Pluto went through hell came back all chilled,
Pluto has a warm heart, just never reacted,

Pluto needs recovery time.

Will it last forever,
Only the Moon understands?
While the Sun and the other planets won't accept.

No, Pluto isn't cold,
Maybe, the Sun is.
Since it lights our day but when it burns,
It doesn't care.

It's ok, the universe is expanding,
It'll take Pluto a way,
You'll never see it again,
Now, Smile.  

By: Zoulaikha
Love is a song that stained up in the air
Whether dead or not it'll always be there
Love is supper on a pair of lips
Onto tender heart it's drops
Love is both sun and moon
Across the sky  meeting each other
Love is a lake that rages with passion
Finding ways to you no matter what's the fashion
Love is a walk in the park
While two hand, are held together
Love is when you run out of words
and you'd keep repeating just coz they run dry
Love may be a word to describe feelings
but will always be the abounded fruit tree
that would always be new with every shoot

By: Zoulaikha
I see a poem in your eyes
Now i know what you feel
I can tell how hurt you are

I see the ocean in your eyes
I know you are smiling to hide it all
But all you wanna do is cry

I see how that fake smile fools
I know that deep down she broke you
As if you're a half of a whole

I see both bad and good
Awfully talking about others to impress
Darling it's called Karma  

I see love
I see hatred
I see all

I got your back
I'll be your adviser
I will be the shoulder where your tear would lay

By:Zoulaikha
How long will it take me to find you
I miss you already, I don’t even know you
Wishing my lucky stars to bring you into my arms
Rest your head my dear I’m ready for it all

After all I found out.
You’re the star guiding me
You’ve saved me already without knowing
I stand up straight to make you proud, can’t wait to tell you all my stories

Take your time
But know I’m waiting over here
Late at night, writing poetry soon all describe you
You’ll forever be mine

Everyone knows about you
Yet you're no closer than before
But as much as I love lilies
I could only fall for you more

I'm desperate to meet my colours
The ones you're unaware exist
My yellow, my saviour,
You blew all my blues away.

I've built our house and its forever green,
I've been in peace my red
When I met the black mysteries I wanted you more ,
After all you are my Lilly coloured white.

We'll hurt, but I promise to heal you
We'll fight, but I'll for always hold you
We'll laugh, it's the purple skies shining
We'll protect, keeping  it secret

Apart of me
Never apart
Don't take a piece of my heart
But take it all

Every inch of me will forever engrave your name
It's foolish to be in love
While still figuring out your name
I can't wait my white

By:Zoulaikha
War
Shooting, bombing, killing, fighting
Why are we fighting in this stupid war
It seems like we do it just for fun
Playing so hard with our gun

Like tanks are toys
With kids inside
Starting a battle against each other
Even if the weather is horrible

War destroyed families
Whether you’re in the same party or not
There is no right or wrong
Every thing is a dreadful knot

Soldiers are killing innocent people
Everyone is bleeding and on the floor
They are scared and in fear
No wonder where they disappear

Young soldiers combat
In such freezing and deadly weather
While people are mad and going insane
The rest of us are yelling “It's unfair”

By: Zoulaikha
Every "goodnight" text I read as "I love you"
I'm caught between breathes
Caused by scenarios in my head
I'm not delusional, I'm a hopeless romanic after all

Walked around until I stumbled upon you
A moment ago I wonder if I'll ever meet you
You walked past me and smiled
Now I want to wake up with you by my side

Darling, Lets live like love novels
Not making Ryle's mistake,
Please don't ever touch me that way
"We'll do it the fairytale way"

Morning kisses
You brush away my hair
I'll make you breakfast
I know you dreamt it this way

Let's change the idea of lust
As I watch you hair slick back complimenting your brown eyes
10,000 stories with all the ink there is
"It took me so long to write you" where have you been?

After all this time I'm trying to dig behind your soil
I'm obvious, you'll know, but I won't admit
It took me so long to write you
But as soon as I shut my eyes I vision your rosy lips

You fell for my smile
As your laughter became my treasure
Tune our bodies to the sound of waves
I want to memorise you like I do my favourite song

Take it slow
Match my energy,
Losing control
I want to hear it dear

Be my safe
Be the only person I long for in the brightest of days
Be my forever red
Be the one I need at every blue

Pick the Brush we'll paint our skies purple
From the moment we kiss, I'd die in our locked lips
Tasting the sweet as sugar nectar
Give me a few to never run out of your aftertaste

**

What love sounds like
Why is it without the purity and heat
What if all I wanted is you
Why is being hopelessly in love lost for all the fights.

All the dark stormy nights
We'll sail the ocean
But wake up with dried up tears
As the sun rays beam highlighting your dark eyes, that's all for now.

By:Zoulaikha
You told me you were sorry,
But i understand what your aims were.
Don't be sorry,
Yhe blame was never on you.

I wanna thank you
For being there when i had no one when i first came
For trying to make us use the potential within us
for being such a blessing

Here we meet again, and you apologizing
No, i am
Sorry, if i have been such  a disappointment
Sorry, for lowering your expectations

Thank you

They say music is what makes us dance
I say you are what makes the music move

By:Zoulaikha
hope i gave some flavor into your life
Nobody has a perfect life,
Everyone has been torn.
Some just deal with it in a perfect way
Your flaws are what make you perfect

Stop understimating yourself
Stop regretting your past
No one is pure
No one is ideal

Curves of yours make you unique
Avoid the toxic
 
You are worthy
Worthy,to all

Love is yet to come
Don't rush it
Or
You'll get heartbreakes before,

The Angel of love will pass by
It'll come at the unexpected time  

By:Zoulaikha
Ponds, lakes, rivers, seas
I be crying late night
But no one feels

They are the 'cause of my pain
Though still don't ask
And non of them feel

I'm tearing apart
My flame is growing inside of me
But they don't feel

No one taught us to love ourselves
That's why I'm weak
People take control of me..

WILL THEY EVER UNDERSTAND?!

That i have feelings just as they do
That i need to be taken care of
No, no one understands

WILL THEY EVER UNDERSTAND?!

I don't think they ever will
'Cause they are arrogant
Haughty, overbearing, hubristic
So why would they care

They have themselves to take care of.....

By: Zoulaikha
Raindrops, but rainbows rise
Nothing seems to be alright
Sounds of crying
As you close your eyes

                   Why is everyone lying?
                    Isn't it surprising how everyone is shy

My mind is racing
Can't stop it raining
My teacher explaining
My brain in another dimension

I'm not thinking straight
I use to love this surrounding
Now it's everything I hate
Got anything to add to my vision?
It'll be hazy anyway  


By:Zoulaikha
Anger. Pain.
It's getting harder to hide,
All the feelings I've built up inside.
It's hard to explain,
Without being considered insane
So I've kept to myself,
Until I realized I need help.

I should have seen it,
Putting a smile on my face and act its all fine.
But i see my future in my own brown eyes,
Is this the first step of it all?
We might love now,
But you will leave.
You’ll find someone,
Then come to me to speak.

You can’t see with your naked eye.
But all these scars helps me see
,
That I survived so much trauma and now I am free.
Makes me realize I was in a place of no rest;

I feel guilty inside for leaving this token.

Now I will see and memorize, I was so broken.


By:Zoulaikha
Have you all heard?
Jingle bells are ringing.
Haven't you all seen?
All the fairy light twinkling.

It's the time of the year
Christmas is near

3 days left for Christmas!
All are getting ready;
Elves approving presents,
Santa checking his list twice,
Reindeers ready for flight.
N' Rudolph always ready to light foggy nights!  

Have you all heard?
Christmas carols outside.
Haven't you all seen?
Christmas trees decorating.

It's the time of the year
CHRISTMAS. IS. NEAR!!

By: Zoulaikha
I write poetry, without even trying.
I write poetry, to relife my pain.
I write poetry, to keep me away.
I write poetry, mad as a hatter.

I cant help it,
I strive to write about the beauty of life,
But end up setting free whats so dark.
I'm thinking "how could a kid be in so much pain?"
"Normally teenage life is all about going insane."

I can't get what makes me happy.
I tend to close up by acting cold,
          I'm not.
             Smiling to cover the clouds when a camera is near.

I can't cry for help,
I'm isolated.
No one will reach out.
No one will reach in.
I propose to shut them all out,
...

They won't understand.

Sun rising,
Everything will be alright.

By: Zoulaikha
Bittersweet, honest conversations
Chocolate and coffee on the side, is this our destination?
My dear as you speak, chills run down my spine
Thoughts of you, turn into butterflies as the moonlight shines

Bread and butter,
Silly little fights
Stay seated at the afterglow my Romeo
Oh! silly little fights end with kisses holding you tight

My chosen one, you're my gorgeous pink skies  
The butter to our bread, as it gets dark  
My hyped dopamine, kissing my birthmark
Up all night, you’re my greatest adventure
*
Fortune telling, as I dive into your golden clouds
My brown eyes lay out our future
Even if the dream ends, don't wake me up.
Magic armour, aren't you the warrior?

No more suffering, lessons were learned,
Love walls, stakes high, hand in hand, jumping blind  
Hold on to the touch, I’m yours at last
The topic is forever swimming in violet grass

Wake me up every morning to the melody of your voice
Let my heart speak as my tongue wrapped tight
Smiles in between kisses, forever intertwined
Stars look like butterflies, heart's divine

Can't finish my reader
Emotions lost my words
Rosey lips locked, shivers as you look into my eyes
Forever, for eternity, forgotten lies

Love for always, a love that's true.

By Zoulaikha
I felt him through my skin,
I knew he started a fire.
The second we've touched,
Our bodies interacted,
Our lips engaged,
Leaving the other dripping the taste of honey.

I might lose control,
Stains of juice are on the floor.
Now my candle must burn,
Your only heat will start its spark,
No other match will light my candle.
The burn inside of me never felt so good.

Don't you ever leave,
Don't you make it stop.

By: Zoulaikha
Temporary home, I'll be all alone.
Roses in gardens all is filled with poison thorns.
Nose bleeds, no breath, my dreams turn to storms.

Wake me up to the sound of your voice.
You'll come over? the sky turns white.
Meet me there tonight, I'm not up to another fight

Kisses taste like sorrow as bridges stay hollow.
Loves bites bleed, I'm yours indeed
Nothing guaranteed, yet you know I'll follow.

How come bruises are mistaken for kisses?
Behind the curtains it all lies.

By: Zoulaikha
How can bruises be mistaken for kisses?
Nothin goes by what i want
Nothing
You ask if im happy with you
But you don't even want me to see you

Who gave you the power to control
We, right, i remebered
I can take it all back
Becareful, don't do me wrong

Or you'll comeback crying

By:Zoulaikha
You pulled me up when I was down,
You told me to smile,
Now you're far.
But the thoughts of you lifts spirits,

I smile always,
No more gun-firing,
No more crystal shattering,
Sue me if i don't stand by.

I'll try to give my all,

I don't want to see you cry,
All i wanna do is see you smile :)

By:Zoulaikha
True leaders passed.
True leaders hidden.
True leaders aren't wanted.
True leaders, oh true leaders.

Everyone wants to be the leader,
But after becoming one, are no use.
Everyone complains.
Everyone complains!

Be a selfless soul,
Think of others, for many
For wholes and halves of human race.
Regardless of age and importance

In the end, you wish, i wish, we wish,
For a leader, to humbly hold a troubled hand.
No, no need to play the blame game.
Now where is our leader?

By: Zoulaikha
Gotten out, I’ve saved me
How funny you’re still around me
Are you real, I think I’m dreaming
Ice cold, thats how they perceive me
Dose after dose its all haze
At dawn we speak
Nowhere to go, let me hear the voice of finally ok

It was summer, i saw you
Smiling, you wished me goodnight
Nothing more was expected
Nothing less was wanted

You posted about it the first time around
It all maybe in my head
But I felt that way too
“Normal conversations, yet so different”

“Forget your past” you say
Talk to me about your future
I’m probably not in it
But your sound gives me quite the wonder

Quite a wonder why
As we speak the rest of the world disappears
I wonder why
The thought of you paints everything black and white
Leaving behind 4 brown eyes shining under the gloomy night

You became a shade of yellow &green
I wonder why  Im up waiting for you to hangup
Fighting the urge to ask you for a few more
Friendly is all it could ever be

Call me, I enjoy it when we do
It’s annoying when I ask all the time..
..If I am
Yet you’re still up as your eyes fall asleep

Zzz

Trying to wish you another goodnight

By:Zoulaikha
Reputation, status n’ position,
Have differences.
But they all take the rap,
For something haven’t done.  

We all, trusted wrong,
Regret it.
But we all try to live by it,
Slightest, survive.

"I care, trust me." they say
No they don’t.
They enjoy seeing you die inside,
It all envy they have.

Trust…?
Has always been an inquiry for me.
I never knew how to deal with it,
And non of you.

Trust.


By: Zoulaikha
“A solider wandering alone
Around people in masks
Like an innocent soul surrounded by evil spirits
No longer alone just merits in lockets”

In the back of my notebook
I'm writing letters of sorrow
Not sure what to call unavoided Tacenda
Help me escape this hysteric agenda

As the ink bleeds out of my pen
And the tears run into pages undone
The fear of forgetting and being forgotton
It's the race I’ll never out run

For the plot of your life isn't your choice
Questioning desires and is it really your voice
Directions you take make no sense
Is it truly there only for suspense

By: Zoulaikha
and that's how its done
Love isn't a word,
Love is power.
Love is pain.
Love is hate.
Love is my strength and my weakness.
Through it I shall rise,
And only through it I shall fall

By: Zoulaikha
Eyes deep dark brown,
Glowing bright under the stars.
His effervescent eyes were tempting pleasant.
As if steam bathed by sunlight,
My skin grew hot whenever he glanced.

His gaze was sharp,
As if lined with fragment of crystal around the edges.
The calculating coldness at the center drew me in,
Yet are disloyal to non feeling.

Beautiful eyes,
Fulfilled their goal, aiming for my heart.
Emotion, I got to see the one for the first time,
It was love at first sight.

By: Zoulaikha
locked up in my head
where can I find the keys ?
they're right there in my hands
why can't I set myself free
its funny how uncomfortable you can be
in your own skin but you aren't able to breathe
they tell you to come out
but laugh the way you do
short skirts
modest is what must be
covered up
"why are you wearing that, it's hundred degrees"

in fear i'm never good enough
diseased to people please
but when the trip comes I know you'll be with her
I'll be in the corner as your photographer
final results done differently. anxiously?
honestly what is the difference always drowning in the ocean of doubt.
anxiety attack, waking me
will I make it in this light?
built my walls, carved them the moment of epiphany
I wish I'm you while wearing heels
head held high, voice steady
look closely, voice steady with trembling hands
I'll be her another day
for now I'll be the anxious lily with that dream
the more it remains a fantasy the easier it seems
step by step I'll get there someday wearing my flats

By Zoulaikha
Insecurities
“The Sun or Moon, Earth?” They asked
Both have a huge place in her heart.
But also made it hard.
Keeping the Earth confused.

The Sun,
First love can’t be denied.
It sparked earths’ world when got the chance.

There is something bout’ The Moon,
It lit the Earths’ path when dark,
It made her laugh even when she’s mad .

The sun is all figured out,
No need to think, its direct.
Ask and you won’t be lost.

The moon is a mystery,
No one has figured  out.
Emotions hidden, but will Earth find out?

So now what Earth,
Have you made up your mind?

By: Zoulaikha
Girl code,
        Bro code,
                 Friendship lies.
Colour fades as you smile,
            Feeling nothing, feeling hallow,
I'm so numb.
                             Caught you.. " how much has it been;
A day, a week, a month, a year or two?"
        It's not about how many,
                     Its  suppose to be forever.
                                          ***­**
Roses aren't always red
                 Violets aren't forever blue
You really thought i'd cry over you,
                     I said i loved you
                                    You thought that was true
Thought you played me,
         Theres one winner in a game for two,                            
                                ­Guess what!
You got played too.
                                            
                                                                ­                             By:Zoulaikha
NO custom button on me,
Why is everyone trying to change me.
I am who I am, I'll stay as I am

Don't tell me you won’t
Then have a shot
Don't tell me I'm wrong, I'm always right

You don't wanna see it.. just leave
Not taking your nonsense
Keep it to yourself

Don't use me
Don't play me
I'm not another video game.

By: Zoulaikha
I'd never split you apart,
All the possible space in and out of you,
Near and far,Far and wide,
Here and there, high and low,
Throughout the land, over the world,
I shall for always claim you mine

Entitle my selfishness.
I still get butterflies when you come around.
Can’t stop the feeling,
My heart races the moment I see you.
The moment you smile, my troubles disappear.

Calls where we both don’t talk.
It may be vexing for you my love,
Just knowing you're present keeps me safe.
Sweetheart don’t you go so far,
NO don’t go so far.
I melt when we kiss,
I lose my words,
You become my everlasting poetry.

By: Zoulaikha

— The End —