"retrospections" poems
*stepping back into the west
chills reverberate up and down my spine
chiseling open obsolescent padlocks
dangling with dust
on ancient treasure chests
pallid colors in the attic release
a blossoming familiarity
faint hints of retrospections float on faded paper
granting me access to roads
where no map is needed
as i peruse the streets
my heart flows coalescing with the vicinity
caressing each detail i transform to fluid
and fuse with the past
through fresh strokes of watercolored memories
recollections flash before my eyes
revealing antiquated stories
though thought forgotten
an etched history endeavors to define me
renewing itself as i turn each corner
i shudder at some remembrances while encompassing others
through synchronicity realization hits
that I am all of it
yet none of it
at the same time
familiar faces paint meaning onto me
no longer do they know me
yet they airbrush vestiges of yesteryear
and coat me with connotations
i allow them to think i am whatever they imagine
i morph into their canvas temporarily
then break free in multi-dimensionality
they don't hear me with a new listening
no longer invested in their projections
once sharp triggers now appear in soft focus
an auspicious mist lies around the edges
of my former life
it is as if i never left
yet traces of the east lie sandpapered in me
a maturation commingles with my former self
flushing out on my skin
tethering newfound emotions
a gentle gratitude for home territory
nestles softly
inward
i listen to the clicks
of my scuffed cowboy boots
on acquainted yet somehow distant sidewalks
the echoes layering multiple impressions
glimmering with the utter beauty of this terrain
as I wander through the majestic rocky mountains
drinking in the quaking aspen's crimson edges
interfacing the evergreens
hushed whispers of autumn loftily rest
juxtaposed neatly against futures waiting to unfurl in the wind
an amalgamation of intimate sights and scents
dance in open wounds
dazzling
homesickness cured
a wholeness returned
as winter's crystal dawn blooms
i realize the depth of my growth
for in leaving here and returning
i cherish the west
my home
©2016 janetaylor
May 1, 2016
May 1, 2016 at 3:50 AM UTC
In retrospect,
I take a quick glance
A glance at our past
Lovebirds we once were
My wing you were
As your wing I were
To each other's *****
We drew ourselves
So as to fly
Merrily to the skies
Seeking beauteous horizons
Horizons filled with glamour
In retrospect,
As time sailed by and by
I lost my wing
A wing that meant the world
A world to me so blissful
Left in a daze I was
Aghast to my heart's core
Drifting by a violent sea
A sea of retrospections
Driven by tides
Tides of regrets
Past violent storms
Storms of doldrums
On yonder I drift
Drifting to an island
An island marred with despair
Where in a circle of confusion I wander
Wandering in an abyss
An abyss pervaded with loneliness
Wondering if at all
I could ever seek redemption.
While downcast
With relentless tears of anguish
Trickling down my cheeks
In despair I wail.
Drenched in doldrums
I reminisce of the splendor
And the novelty pulchritude
The pulchritude you bear
In retrospect,
Gone are the halcyon days
Days wistfully washed away
Away by the tides of time
In retrospect,
My heart craves thy love
A love that still lingers
In my riven heart
A heart that shall never
Ever ameliorate.
Jun 30, 2015
Jun 30, 2015 at 6:21 PM UTC
I want to swim up by your side
Between the sheets, through the tide
Warm my toes and take me under
Through depths and air bubbles we plunder
Your skin has a flavor, but do me a favor
Avoid all the retrospections
Focus on simple satisfactions
Your nose crinkles when you stifle a yawn
The longest hour is right before the dawn
Jun 22, 2014
Jun 22, 2014 at 1:55 AM UTC
take me by the hand
tour me 'round, sights unseen
take me to the twisted annals of your hometown
show me the back doors
and best tables of all your favorite places
take me by the hand and show me
show me
show me what it means
to walk the streets of your city
to look outside your window
and pray
destroy my misconceptions
and ***** your retrospections
build a city of you in me
May 13, 2013
May 13, 2013 at 7:30 PM UTC
“Ahem! My name is Doldrums
The mighty perdurable king of kings
*King to the realm of despair
Loneliness is my lovely queen*
*So far we’re blessed with three kids
Our first born was christened heartache*
*The second born retrospections
And the last born nostalgia*
*We dwell in a beauteous wonderland
A world with beauteous flowers
Flowers that all bloom no more*
*A world with amazing rivers
Rivers that all ceased to flow*
*A world with emerald forests
Forests where birds never chirp*
*A world blessed with plenty of streams
Streams that all dried up*
*A world with eye popping mountains
Mountains that all crumbled to dust*
*A world blessed with soft rains
Rain that rains no more*
*A world with beautiful starry lit deserts
Deserts where you’ll find not a single oasis*
*A world with beauteous emerald islands
Islands all marred with despair hence desolate*
*A world blessed with myriads of stars
Effulgent stars that all ceased scintillating*
*A world blessed with beautiful seas
Seas where you’ll find not a single fish*
*A world enveloped with glamorous clouds
Dark clouds of hate scudding
Athwart our wild blue yonder
Hence it never dawns*
Jun 17, 2016
Jun 17, 2016 at 3:20 PM UTC
everything is warm and alive at this time of night.
2 am, while the entirety of the town is resting
my mind is creating stories and projecting memories.
the retrospections are deep and comforting,
offering more to me than sleep ever could.
I see them in shades and hues of red
keeping me warm in a way my bed cannot.
maybe this is better than sleep
maybe I was just meant to think
instead of dream.
Apr 12, 2014
Apr 12, 2014 at 10:45 PM UTC