I thought it right to assess some antidepressants, which philosophers are more inclined to call mood enhancers.
This was during my foray into human enhancement, substances intended to enhance physicality, cognition or mood. Nootropic compounds concern the latter two categories.

The most commonly prescribed mood enhancers are serotonin reuptake inhibitors (SRIs), but it takes over a week for these compounds reach their peak effect.
Thus I approached them with the notion that a limited dosage might point to their character, though  not reveal. These considerations in mind, I set about acquiring a few miscellaneous anti-D's.

Fluoxetine was the first successful selective serotonin re-uptake inhibitor (SSRI), better known by its original brand-name Prozac. Fluoxetine has an acute biological half-life of between 1-3 days. Presence of a trifluoromethyl group on the compound deserves note, I wonder what the presence of electronegative fluorine atoms add to the psychoactive flavor of a compound (subjective effects).
I administered a single dose by mouth, there was some indication of subjective character. Light serotonergic sensations and seemingly benign mood-dampening, there is a ****** towards the positive. Waking headspace relatively uninteresting. Observed hints of oneirogenesis, did not manifest in enough character to be detailed - a sort of vivid, 'pulsive wandering, more pronounced in contrast to its waking character.
Good experiment, interesting results.
Ligand     Ki (nM)   Ki (nM)
Target      Flx            Nflx
SERT        1               19
NET         660           2700
DAT         4180         420
5-HT2A   200           300
5-HT2B    5000         5100
5-HT2C    72.6          91.2
α1             3000         3900
M1            870           1200
M2            2700         4600
M3            1000         760
M4            2900         2600
M5            2700         2200
H1            3250         10000

Sertraline is another popular SSRI, also known by it's original brand-name Zoloft. Sertraline has a variable half-life, on average 26 hours.
It's metabolite, desmethylsertraline, has a half life between 62-104 hours but is a far less potent Serotonin Releasing Agent (SRA).
The presence of two chlorine atoms is interesting. The usual, phenomenal serotonergicity is present and pushing towards the positive.
Some nausea, particularly when hungry (this disappeared after some minestrone soup). Some faintness after physical exertion. This dose did not promote onirogenesis. There was a moment of cognitive distortion when the proportions of a focal object seemed to be growing in-and-out, shifting in size.
Site                 Ki (nM)
SERT              0.15–3.3
NET               420–925
DAT               22–315
5-HT1A       >35,000
5-HT2A          2,207
5-HT2C          2,298
α1A        ­        1900
α1B                 3,500
α1D                 2,500
α2                  477–4,100
D2                  10,700
H1                  24,000
mACh           427–2,100
σ1                   32–57
σ2                   5,297

Escitalopram is an SSRI commonly prescribed for major depression and generalised anxiety. It is the (S)-stereoisomer of citalopram. The biological half-life is of escitalopram is between 27-32 hours.
I administered a dose and thought the phenomenal serotonergicity less apparent than fluoxetine but then gastro-intestinal disturbance was noted, I surmised it has a high affinity for 5-HT2C.
Any oneiric qualities were not readily apparent after a single dose, relatively little visual imagery which is understandable given its lack of affinity for 5-HT2A. I found this to be philosophically interesting. Mood elevation observed in bursts of conversation and as odd sensations, possible mental discomfort.
Ligand,
Recptr     Ki (nM)
SERT       2.5
NET        6,514
5-HT2C   2,531
α1            3,870
M1           1,242
H1           1,973

Venlafaxine is a selective serotonin-norepinephrine reuptake inhibitor (SNRI). Venlafaxine and its metabolites are active for about 11 hours.
Initial subjective effects similar to a very light empathogenic stimulant. Perception of altered attention-span/increased reflexive response; energizing yet paradoxically much yawning.
Ligand,  Vnfx      Dvnfx
Recptr    Ki(nM)  Ki(nM)
SERT  ­    82           40.2
NET       2480        558.4

Tianeptine is a tricyclic antidepressant (TCA) with an unusual mechanism of action. It is an atypical agonist of the μ-opioid receptor and has been described as a (selective) serotonin reuptake enhancer (SRE). It has a short duration as sodium salts [prescribed form] of between 2-4 hours but as sulfate this can be notably extended, some of its metabolites are active for longer than tianeptine itself.
Definitely anxiolytic, quite artificial; possible aphrodisiac. I find its opioid activity dissuading, requires caution.
Site          Ki (nM)
MOR       383–768 (Ki)
                 194 (EC50)
DOR      >10,000 (Ki)
                 37,400 (EC50)
KOR      >10,000 (Ki)
                 100,000 (EC50)
All other transporter/receptor/sub-receptor values are >10,000 (Ki).

Bupropion is a norepinephrine-dopamine reuptake inhibitor (NDRI) with affinity for some nicotinic receptors. Bupropion and its metabolites are active for between 12-36 hours. Interestingly it is a substituted cathinone.
Initial subjective effects similar to a fairly light stimulant. Perception of increased attention-span and improved cognition. It is an onirogen that is neutral in quality, enhancing vivid dreaming (a boon of its nicotinic affinity which is counteracted if the stimulant component impinges on sleep). Completely absent of serotonergicity, curious.
The N-tert-butyl group's effect is most interesting, how it affects metabolism and to what extent ROAs alter pharmacokinetics.
I took 150mg ******, as extended and as instant release (the latter was more pronounced). I thought an altered pharmakinetic profile might result from bypass of hepatic metabolism, so I tried 25mg insufflated and felt as if there was effect that it differed slightly from oral ROAs, but also worried that its metabolic fate is thence unknown (compare to the neurotoxic 3-CMC). What of other bupropiologues,
for example, 3-Methyl-N-tert-butyl-methcathinone? Indeed.
                        Bupropion    R,R-Hydroxybuprpn   Threo-hydrobuprpn
AUC               1                     23.8                                  11.2
Half-life         11 h                 19 h                                 31 h
IC50 (μM)
DAT               0.66                  inactive                          47 (rat)
NET               1.85                   9.9                                  16 (rat)
SERT              inactive          inactive               ­            67 (rat)
α3β4 nic         1.8                   6.5                                   14 (rat)
α4β2 nic         12                     31                                   no data
α1β1γδ nic     7.9                    7.6                                  no data

Moclobemide is a reversible inhibitor of monoamine oxidase A (RIMA), its monoamine oxidase inhibition lasts about 8–10 hours and wears off completely by 24 hours. Inhibiting the decomposition of monoamines (e.g. serotonin, norepinephrine and dopamine) increases their accumulation at an extracellular level. It tends to suppress REM sleep and so it lacks oneirogenic properties.
Feeling of well-being, less constrained by the usual anxieties; openness. Relatively unnoticeable side-effects when diet is carefully managed. Made the mistake of eating a cheese and turkey sandwich (i.e. foodstuff rich in tryptophan/tyramine), indications of serotonergicity later became apparent: feelings of overheating and flushing, slight sweating, racing thoughts and anxious discomfort. A stark reminder of Shulgin's old adage: "there is no casual experiment".
Combination with a select few tryptamines (not 5-MeO-xxT) should be safe, and synergistic (perfect for pharmahuasca); reputed to potentiate GHB. However, generally it is extremely dangerous to combine with serotonergic drugs.

When Ghost girl comes to call
She walks through the wall
Which can be a shock
If only she used the lock

It must be hard being dead
When she loses her head
She can't take any more
Of staring up from the floor

copyright 2011

I can see eclipse in my life
Hope it was a while in my life
My shadow is leaving me
My smile is filled with tears
I can feel the loneliness
Even I am around hundreds of people
I call my yesterday happy day
Now I can call it is a dark day
I became helpless
And hopeless
What can I do today
Just remembering all my good

(1)
Just like that,
My heart fell into your hands.

(17)
Mid September,
Wild flowers bloomed
Deep within my soul.
The sun drowned in light,
The moon shone across the stars.

(76)
I finally realized
Why I walk on the street
Instead of the side walk
And why I stay up all night
Watching the stars
Instead of dreaming of the moon.
I loved how
You always finished my sentences,
And I love you t-

(119)
I counted all the stars
And I gave up
After 32.
I decided to dream of you
Instead of the moon.

(210)
His eyes lit up brighter than the galaxy
And I prayed that I was the only
Supernova in his eyes

(308)
Slowly
Day becomes night
And the clouds are covering the stars.
The moon doesn't exist in my dreams
Anymore.

(501)
Where have you been, good friend?
Why have you left me here
With no warning?
Why are the flowers
Unwatered?

(634)
He said he couldn't
Live without me
Yet somehow,
He's still breathing
And I'm drowning

(789)
You are in my heart
But I am not in yours

(901)
The wild flowers turned to weeds
As summer turned to fall.
2:31am
Crept closer to me

(1,105)
Time stands still
As you stand in front of me
Telling me lies.
Don't finish my sentences
Because I still love y-

(1,256)
Don't tell me that you love me
Because I knew you never did.
Stop lying
And let me free.
The flowers that grew in my soul
Have turned to dead weeds,
Suffocating my heart.

(1,427)
I counted all the stars
And only found two.

(1,581)
Maybe it's true-
Some people were meant to fall in love,
But not meant to be together.

(1,582)
The weeds are tangled,
The moon escaped from my heart.
I counted all the stars that I could find,
And only found one.
Maybe I should just move on from you.

427

I’ll clutch—and clutch—
Next—One—Might be the golden touch—
Could take it—
Diamonds—Wait—
I’m diving—just a little late—
But stars—go slow—for night—

I’ll string you—in fine Necklace—
Tiaras—make—of some—
Wear you on Hem—
Loop up a Countess—with you—
Make—a Diadem—and mend my old One—
Count—Hoard—then lose—
And doubt that you are mine—
To have the joy of feeling it—again—

I’ll show you at the Court—
Bear you—for Ornament
Where Women breathe—
That every sigh—may lift you
Just as high—as I—

And—when I die—
In meek array—display you—
Still to show—how rich I go—
Lest Skies impeach a wealth so wonderful—
And banish me—

Today I died on the freeway
by the overpass on the 427

a hot and relentless August rain
made it too dark to be five thirty

I walked home slowly from work
as you do when you're tired

oh yes, I was sad too
but we all are

it's easy to be sad
when it rains in August

when I reached the overpass
in the middle I leaned over

my hair passed my eyes
and droplets fell

down, down

I thought about it
twenty feet into traffic

the guardrail is never as useful
as a sweet and good-hearted hug

so then I thought better of it
and put my headphones in

I died on the freeway
then got up and kept walking.

Who is someone you have let down in your life?

469. If you could go to any age in your life for a week, what age would you choose? Why?

468. Have you ever regretted meeting someone in your life? Why?

467. Who is a person in your life that you are no longer in contact with, but if you were to think about them enough you would tear up?
->Ben, Itzhel

466. What is a memory you wish you could relive again with one another?

465. Where is a place (restaurant/arcade) you want to try or visit?
->rage room

464. What is the longest time you have chewed gum for?

463. What is the weirdest gum flavor you have ever tried?

462. If you could say anything to someone you no longer talk to anymore, what would it be and why?

461. What is one of the most painful words you have heard your parent day to you?
->maybe you really are sick in the head and need a therapist, you're killing your mother, you've completely changed and I miss the girl you were before...you weren't a burden

460. When you go on vacation, what do you look forward to most? Do you prefer cold or hot weather? Do you like to plan or wing it day by day?

459. What age do you think you would want to live until? What's the perfect age range for you?

458. What do you need to have happened to feel like you have lived a fulfilled life? family, work, travel, love, etc.?

457. What’s a fun memory from Valentine’s Day when you were in elementary school?

456. What’s the coolest or most memorable Mother’s or Father’s Day arts and crafts that you did in elementary school?

455. Have you even grown your own vegetables or fruits? If so, what was it?

454. When was the last time you went to the movies? What movie?

453. Recall the first time you tried pop rocks.

452. As a kid, what was your favorite jolly rancher flavor?

451. Who is someone that you think about from time to time wondering how they are doing since you just drifted away from one another?

450. What is a relationship (romantic, friend) that ended that you're glad ended but still hurts to think about at times?

449. What is a door that closed in your life that you were devastated by at the time but now realize was actually a blessing?

448. Would you say that you lie often?

447. What was the last lie you told? To who? Why?

446. What is your choice of sauce if you order chicken nuggets?

445. How do you like to be supported when you are sad?

444. Face one another, close your eyes, and open your eyes once you’re ready. Once both of you are staring at one another, stare for as long as you can. Then at the end describe what the experience was like.

443. What song reminds you of the other? If there isn’t one, give a song recommendation.

442. Give a compliment to the other that focuses on something you think they do not hear often?  

441. What is a time in your life you would not want to go back to?

440. What is a time in your life that you would go back to?

439. Who is a friend that you miss the way things used to be with them? What changed the dynamic?

438. If you want to get married, what is your ideal age? Why?

437. If given the option, would you be a sugar baby?

436. Who do you think is most likely to live in another country? Would you? Why or why not?

435. What color do you think of when you imagine the other person? Is there a smell, a shape?

434. Who is someone you wish you knew under different circumstances? Why?

433. Overrated, underrated, just right: chocolate chip cookies, bacon, French kisses, forehead kisses, chalk?

432. What is the most intimate thing another person has done to you?

431. What is the most intimate thing another person has said to you?

430. What is the most intimate thing you’ve done to another human?

429. What is the most intimate thing you’ve said to another human?

428. If you’ve been kissed, explain your best kiss and what made it so?

427. Describe a memory that felt like a movie scene?
->my first and second kiss

426. Is there someone in your life you wish you could take their trauma/pain away from? If so who and why (if you feel comfortable naming)?

425. Who is someone who you consider to be precious that isn’t young? Why?

424. Who is your closest friend form the opposite ***? What is it about that that made them get this title?

423. What is the worst pain you have ever felt that wasn’t physical?

422. If you could speak any language in the world, what would it be and why?

421. Who is someone who you think has experienced the greatest amount of pain but hides it "well"? What is a misconception you have of them?

420. What is one of the biggest misconceptions you have of yourself in relation to how you think others view you?

419. Do you think you’re good person? What makes a person “good”? Why it why not?

418. Would you like to be proudest of your accomplishments or your character

417. If you could confront someone who did you ***** in your past and ask *** who would it be and why?

416. What’s the pain in me you’d most like to heal?

415. Have you ever been too scared to admit your growing feelings towards someone? What stopped you?

414. How would you describe falling in love with someone to an 80yo vs a 7yo?

413. What do you tend to think of as you wake up and lay in your bed in the morning?

412. What’s a kink of yours?

411. How has this week went week because of (you) something you said or did?

410. What do you want me to tell you that you feel you can’t say to yourself?

409. What is a movie or book ending that stayed with you?

408. How would you describe the feeling of sunlight and moonlight on your skin?

407. Do you like the sun or moon more?

406. How do you know you’re alive and not just by your ****** functions?

405. What color do you think of when you imagine a unicorn, bird, heart, fear, lollipop?
-> white and light purple, blue, red, black, red

404. What was your last memory from your childhood that you were reminded of recently?

403. Would you be a top or bottom?

402. What kind of shampoo do you use?

401.  How often do you shower?

400. Does assurance work?
-> depends. Sometimes it’s needed to help boost, other times its like a drug you need another hit
-> a behavior or action never happens once

399. What are your unique values that you bring to relationships?
-> thoughtful, kind, wonderful lover, goes out of your way to those you live, loyal, good conversationalist (feed the relationship with your mind)
->Knowing your value won’t change when challenged by the other’s external achievement and you won’t need to be reassured

398. Have you met a person that has challenged your mind intellectually? How many?

397. When was the last time you went to bed hoping that you’d not wake up?

396. Do you ever wonder how you came to be attracted to a physical look? What makes someone attractive to you physically? Is it conditioning? What if our desires were purely constructed for us?

395. When was the last time you felt proud of yourself? What was the context?

394. Who has made you cry the most painful tears in your life?

393. What is something someone struggled with around you and you didn’t know how to help?

392. What are you struggling with?

391. What is something that always makes you angry when you think about it?

390. When was the last time you cried? What was it about? We’re you alone? Did you want someone?

389. What is your favorite and why: earth, fire, water, wind?

388. What is your favorite vegetable?

387. What is your favorite fruit?

386. Do you have someone you would call in the middle of the night for emotional support?

385. When was a time you said I love you and regretted it the most? When was a time you said it and didn’t mean it the most?

384. How many times have you peed in a pool?

383.  How do clams reproduce?

382. What color of you think of when you think of the ocean? Blue, green, or both?

Handshake

Extended arms overcome to reconcile
what was once divided and separated.

Perhaps one or both has to reach out
further, even to a protracted cantilever.

Age, tradition and culture arch backs
but a bow does not mean genuflection.

Traversing a span to overcome and reach
beyond voids of indifference takes ingenuity.

That which connects links of a chain
straddling the sprocket, is a split pin.

The cross of Calvary did not vex Jesus but
we let anger obliterate our viaducts of life.

Yet rehabilitation is achievable, 427 years
of damaged history was restored at Mostar.

(1)
My heart fell into his hands
That bright September morning

(17)
Wild flowers bloom in my chest
As he stares from across the room

(76)
I always loved how you always finished my sentences
(And I love you t-)

(210)
His eyes lit up brighter than the galaxy
And I shut my eyes tight
To prove to myself
I am the only supernova in his eyes

(308)
Day seemed to shift too quickly
Into night
Where the stars are masked by the
Impeding clouds

(501)
He left the lights on and the flowers unwatered

(634)
He said he could live without me
Yet
He's still breathing while I drown

(789)
You are in my heart
But I am not in yours

(901)
Weeds weaved in the crevice of my bones
2:31 stays by my side

(1,105)
Time no longer stands still when he looks over me
Whispering his perpetual love

(1,256)
He brings me flowers to prove the pain behind his smile is inexistent

(1,427)
How could I have fallen in love with a boy who
Could never have the capacity to love me, too

(1,582)
He tells me how much better I could be without him
Yet these last one thousand five hundred and eighty two days
All I crave is you

My dear love...
When I'm breathing my last
I want to be locked in your embrace
I want to feel your nourishing touch
...your breath filled with warmth and passion
I want to take in the aroma of your existence one last time
Then as my eyes begin to close gradually
Gently lay me on the bed
With a pillow under my head and sing me a soft lullaby
The sweetness of your voice and your illuminating presence will make even death seem beautiful

I long for freedom,
but maybe a little attachment
an attraction of passion,
gentle and arousing,
a fire needing dousing,
that burns with urgency,

a relentless urge to see
someone I desire greatly,
someone who fascinates
with the art she creates,
and thoughtful debates
that help me generate
great ideas.

I long for another’s eyes
to flash with surprise,
because she was
attracted to my minds
and kind heart,
but beneath the sheets
she sees muscles that please,
a shape configured
by hard work
and delivered
for her personal pleasure.

I long to know and be known
to reveal and be shown
with a partner of equal quality
who sees the value in me.

Passion, and love
interspersed with creativity
and compassion
is my fantasy.