Finally . . .
I sit in the midst of silence . . .
and silence resides in the midst
of me

I strain to hear
the nothingness . . .
and it comes over
so clear

All promises lay asleep
in their coffins . . .
covered in stone and time

This empty blackness
comes complete . . . stealing whatever sanity there is left in me

Here in my equilibrium there
are no days or weeks . . . just the certainly that no one speaks

Come hungry darkness . . .never to be satisfied . . . for you swallow eternity
still there is nothing inside

The indifference of silence
bends over to kiss me . . .
cold blackened lips whispering
"There is no certainty."

Enjoying being alone
With first snow falling
On my lawn,
Covering Spring
Til distant dawn
With mini mellows.
Beulah, my new magnolia,
Will ring the bell in May,
But resting now,
Beneath the warmth of winter.

Can I ever forgive him for leaving?
I remember it was a cold, cold morning,
as the saying goes:
Nothing burn like the cold inside your heart  :Quote

The cheery *** whistle  louder than the factory whistle:
I got so tired of fighting with the devil:
And on the other hand asking the lord for strength and guidance
to made it throughout the days ,
But as the old saying goes
He only helps them, who help themselves

Sometimes our love: Isn’t strong enough to caged them in
I remembered opening my journal and jot down notes on events,
That led up to the day of his leaving: I began to sort out my
  my plus and minuses like a grocery list on a low budget:
my thought turned to the innocence young lady sleeping in the other room

The way in which we met, a love that was pure, a love that was consent
and everything was about to be change that morning
I remembered sounds of the boots, I remembered the melt down
I remember the song, I remember the lyrics
These boots were made for walking.
One of these days those boots going to walk all over you.

It felt like if the devil boots were walking away from us
Down the street, away from my home ,
boots that had walked all over me for five years.

It was finally coming to an end:
The boots walked toward the elevator door
For the last time, the last slam, the last tear drop
and the last grip of the devil touch.

The heart can get really cold if all you’ve known in winter :Quote

I want to leave all
I think I control,
The stranglehold's
Not good for my soul;
It's an arthritic grip,
A tight fit.
But if you put pressure
On my wrists
You'll help me to unfold.

the womb of the Universe still hasn't shrivelled
just as the hand with the gun in it itches for a target
ploughed and seeded with the past and future
Mankind gropes forward with its technology
to fertilise the unfertile, make a robot army
and give birth to the immortal generation.

That 1 lengthy and detailed conversation we had as I fixed her a hot bubble bath, it was very necessary to figure out the pattern in which each of our souls orbited around one another's life. Life. It seems that in the seams of this biographical regime, we get lost in between 2 wings, steering without a true tale, leading with our beaks instead of our two feet. Finding elation through impatience. Determination to fly without defining our own matrix. At that particular time I just wanted to slowly sit your soft body down into that pool of lavender scented steamed water, but everything you had to say nearly drowned me. The invisible crown I continuously placed on your head suddenly vanished as my imagination panicked. I always thought that my mind was backed up by my heart which was backed up by your art. Oh how gentle you scribble. I have to erase line by line, direction by direction, affection by affection, disconnect on top off disconnection. Difficulties I'm having while looking at you lather but no longer seeing you in the picture. Watching you lave as you give me your take on how our relationship was shaped was a bit unfitting. In my mind "it's inevitable that she's open for bidding". I'm lounged against the sink in a bind. Bonded by your fondness, then detached by your honest responses. How blunt you are and how drunk I'm soon to be. Wasted vibrations, my mouth began to tremble. Somehow I find an idea to cause the both of us to tickle. Temporary bliss. Moreover all of my hard efforts that night turned out to be the worst shift. I went from pleased to please. Expectedly you never tried to appease by appealing to my needs. Draining water like my decaying heart. Drying off reminds me of my suffocated feelings. Lotion as I drink this 40% potion. Hoping of hydrated coping. Can you leave? So I can shower, attempting to rinse away the most beautifully devastating hour.

So I hear,
just today,
in fact,

I'm not certain exactly when it was said,
a reliable source,
NPR,

So, I hear that great wall,
the BIG & beautiful one
on our Southern border,
the one HE wanted to build?

The one he raged about,
& of course,
while it was always preposterous,

Anyway he says,

It can maybe be a fence,
instead.

Oh my ****.

Huh, interesting,

Well, that's not wishy washy,
No,
At all...
solid guy, he is,
& along with all the other rapidly,
changing things,
that he was so very,
passionate about,

And given,
the absolute myriad of obstacles,
from forcing Mexico to pay,
(haha- good one)
yeah,
making Mexico pay,
sure,

By the way,
do you want to work for his immigration?

Cuz' he's gonna need a bunch of new
recruits,
if so,

Not to mention,
workers to survey & complete,
that ridiculous project,
the complex geological complications,
in an interesting terrain,
humph,
indeed,
& the endless wordly implications,
that and so MANY other problems
we face,
far worse,
& BIGGER ones too,

Seriously,
check it out,
it would literally take,
FOREVER to build,
true narcissism,
exists,
apparently,

Though,
he might have single-handedly stopped illegal immigration by being elected.

Mission accomplished?

Do you wanna come live in the U.S. now?

Hahaha,
So stupid,
not REALLY funny,
still good to laugh,

This?

This is who we elected?
were we ALL high,
on propaganda?

God help us in times of war.

Cherie Nolan © 2016

High on one thought of love
all walls fall at its sound
softly now my love
love that conquers my all.