Spoiling with age,
a global atrophy.
If I hit rock bottom,
can I rest?
How much longer can I pick,
before there's no more ego left?

Spring has gone
Summer has come
My heart is still in winter
The freezing wind made me chill,
and froze the memory
so i can search for

Time stopped in this winter
Everyone repeated same scene every day
Everything become static
like pictures in google image
so  i can search for

My steps are slower
but my heart is kept searching
starting from this freezing winter
will go on and on.

Sigh

Sometimes I wake up out of breath
Questioning if I am living only for death
My bed holds bad dreams and demons
No peace comes when I am sleeping

Questioning if I am living only for death
I hate my life and I have nothing left
No peace comes when I am sleeping
Only thing keeping me sane is books

I hate my life and I have nothing left
I care for others more than I do myself
Only thing keeping me sane is books
My friends wear makeup and cute looks

I care for others more than I do myself
I can hardly stand getting out of bed
My friends wear makeup and cute looks
While I can't stomach my own reflection
Sometimes I wake up out of breath

-A Black Girl Untold

Hurt me
The wretched hand suffocates pleading lips
I gasp for air as the blood drips

Curse me
Unwanted whispers escape with my breath
Now's the time, I pray, slow death

Control me
Speeding, drive myself off the road
Burning mind, burning sight, it's my soul you corrode

I'm not possessed, I'm death obsessed.
I don't want to die, but I still fantasize.
I didn't ask for this, apathy created my abyss.
It's not me, at the altar still I'd plea.
It's my demons, laughing at my mortal misery.

'I crewed 'today',
...
O thee,
have you puzzled me
with care,
in the land of the free?
~