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shining diamonds Dec 2019
My heart is heavy.
My soul burdened.
My mind obliterated.
I cant find
no reason nor rhyme.
To just be fine.

I find my life is turning
Around with the tide.
Coming in and out
destitute and without.

Without choice.
Without need.
All I feel is that I bleed.
As a mark of a me.
To just want to be free.

My heart is heavy.
My mind in turmoil.

Just like some rolled up foil.
Discarded on the top
waiting to flop into the bin.

For once I have not found.
Anyone around which is rather profound.
To be here and then not.
I wish this could all be forgot.
Just a little something i was thinking about
shining diamonds Jun 2019
two lines
is not a poem
its two lines
it has no substance
no structure
its a thought
someone caught
is it noteworthy
not in the least
but the person
who writes without
there not present
here in the moment
of all the people who do such
who think it only takes that much
should give your head a wobble
it's just a load of cobble  
the two lines are just that
like a load of tatt
poetry comes from a calling
a memory
a feeling
is nothing dust blowing in the breeze
you make a mockery of the art
like you just would ****
all over your page
not bleed at any stage
is it because your simply
not smart enough
to have a worthy entry
dig deeper into your soul
if you lack the talent
of this simple art
pray tell
are you worth more than
a **** ?
if you throw art away
thinking you can walk away
then i have this to say
your not an artist
your stuck in self pity
look in the mirror and think
where did you go
or did you just blink
those two lines
bug me more than
any times
i've seen anything else
are your not incapable
or simply not know how
i think you just don't give
the art the respect it so needs
look at yourself
a poem
is not two lines
a thought
a passing
a nothing
this is not your diary
find somewhere else to share
because i for one care
you lay the art bare
more effort should be found
if your words are to be sound.
shining diamonds May 2019
There a piece of me that's missing
I'm not sure how to begin
but there a piece of me missing
It's lost with no way to retrieve it
It's missing in the endless sea that is me
trying to be someone i'm not
I've gotten so lost
I feel like I've just tossed
my life right out of the window  
there's a piece of me missing
I can feel my heart break as I breathe
all the while the world keeps turning
and the piece of me keeps yearning
forever lost in the sea that is me
do we ever look deeper
deep enough to see
what's missing inside you and me
there's a piece of me missing
I can't but weep
let a little tear seap
to grieve the lost
of something so pure
that I feel has been thrown on the floor
there's a piece of me missing
as my heart beats louder
and memories become cloudier
there a piece of me missing
do you ever look inside
truly deeply inside
or are you scared of what you will find ?
shining diamonds Apr 2019
I want to smile again
but this weight on my heart
Is pulling me further apart
I want to smile again
but when I think of you time and again
it makes me think of back then
I want to smile again
but when I see your face
It looks so out of place
I want to smile again
but it feels so wrong
to never belong
I want to smile again
but this weight you left on my heart
you said we would never part
I want to smile again
you left with no word
which is completely absurd
I want to smile again
but you don't care
and you never have
I want to smile again
The scars left on my heart
said we needed to part
I want to smile again
but the feeling of you never cared
or even dared to care
which made my heart break
with an awful ache
I want to smile again
and maybe one day I will
but still
I want to smile again.
shining diamonds Apr 2019
My hands are empty I have nothing left to give
but you say your happy and we just live
My hands are empty I have nothing left to give
but you say it doesn't matter anyway
My hands are empty I have nothing left to give
In that case give me your heart for I want no more.
My hands are empty I have nothing left to give
so take my heart and I'm not sure you if  knew but I only ever wanted someone such as you.
shining diamonds Apr 2019
Trying to find motivation;
feels like an impossible task;
and i guess you really got to ask;
what is it that keeps me from reaching it;
why is it out of my reach;
what is there trying to teach me;
why is it that one step ahead;
that i can never keep in stead;
forever chasing a dream;
only to see it fall apart at the seams;
why is motivation so hard for me to find;
what does it lie behind;
why can't it be easy to find;
what's making it allude me;
when i just want to be free;
can't you see. ?
shining diamonds Apr 2019
Tries to think of any other day than today
It seems so dull and heavy
so completely broken in pieces
like a puzzle I have no energy to solve
the energy feels drained
almost stained all over the walls
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