I notice the group of homeless people I see every morning
However this morning they are fully involved in some sort of drama
I notice how one man puts his arm around the other man
I notice the humanness, the support, the love and care

I notice the woman with the **** on her back
It pushes her fully forward so she can't see the sky
I notice her and her husband walking along by the sea
I notice how he is holding her hand
The sight fills my eyes with tears
I hope they go and drink a coffee and share a slice of carrot cake
I hope he kisses her cheek and tells her he loves her
I imagine a blanket of love enveloping them both

I notice the woman with the gold sandals and bunch of floweres sticking out her bag
I notice her dishevelled hair and clothes
I sense her aloness
Her sandals and floweres make me smile
I hope they make her smile too

The moments of beauty
The human need for love, beauty and support
These moments are all around
Within the sadness and dark realities
They are there
The magic is there

Desire, attachment, craving
From attachment stems desire and craving
I am attached to you
So therefore I crave your attention
It's funny
Why do I crave your attention so much
What is it about you?
Why do I crave your approval
Why do I so desperately want you to be proud of me
Believe in me
See me
Why?

Is it because I craved this from my father?
Do I transfer that unmet need onto you?
But what is it about you?

You are driven and succesful as my father was
And you have a vice just as my father did
yet you are different
I trust you in a way I never trusted my father

How do I slay this need within me?
How do I meet it from within?
How do I love you without needing something from you?
How do I release my desire for you and all that you represent?

By stepping into my own power
And finally admitting and letting go of my need for my father.

Believe in myself, in my life force
Acknowledge my fears
Fear of him not wanting me - getting bored with me.
Fear of the wrong choice - fear of staying and fear of leaving.
Need to trust myself, my gut, my soul
Let me know, I am listening to you
My logic does not know the answer

Surrender angel
Feel the love
Feel the heart break
Feel the heartbreak of regret
       For hurting someone you love

Hotness held within the wholsomeness

Flow
Burst
Keep moving
Let the momentum take me
Go inward
Don’t judge, don’t think
Keep moving
Flowing
Bursting
Dance
Dance till it becomes real
Until I understand
All the pain and insecurity
All the beauty
All the not understanding
Don’t have to understand
Just keep moving
Keep dancing.

If you left he would be ok?
Stop thinking only of him
Can you stay?
Can your heart stay?
Wait until you are sure, and then do with courage what must be done
Do with courage what must be done to be true to your soul
Safety is not where fulfillment lies.