I wear my heart on my pinky finger
I've been making promises to myself
And no one else.

I would take to the lake.
Try to clear my head.
Think.
My boy, he liked coral pink.
And oh did his heart sink.
I took to the lake.
Oceans were too far away.
We shifted and we swayed.
Not today.
Couldn't stay.

the thunder
crashes
& off
eyelashes
tears fall
like the
night rain.

Underneath a spangled sky
hours leap, our eyes half-closed,
embers fade and then we watch
the sunrise decompose.

In my life
I am the closest thing to permanent
and every single thing else
is exactly temporary.

Is it stronger to say
I'm Fine one million times
or should I admit you broke my heart,
you really did.

Lip liner across our lips,
connect the dots between our hips.
Dotted lines divide the road,
sign the line where debts are owed.
Signed letters, cursive cards,
smoke lingers from stiff cigars.
Smoked out lines above our eyes,
count the trails of tears we've cried.

And now I am drawing the line with you,
erasing the previous lines we drew.

ethereal tones droning,
harmonious wings flap
harpooning the heart
into soprano skies.

I know I am wasting time,
I'm awake at night, can't sleep and my jaw's in pain.

tonight the sky
needed to cry;
likewise, so did I.

& like the thunder
loud & bold I,
too, needed all to
know.

Your words were grapefruit juice in a finger wound,
supposedly sweet but harsh too soon.

Dating is the Devil's game.
If she wants to slither in,
let her.
Soon the apple falls upon the head
of the snake.

Tender times are telling times,
She will get what she deserves.

Wear me, wear me out.
Oh wait, you already did.
It's these ones, these broken hearts
that give us the answers from within.

5AM i walk towards "home" in yesterday's dress,
lake seagulls scream in the sky,
a still-shallow sun melts my sensitive eyes.
good-morning  
i think, good?
perhaps,
but nonetheless morning

--a take on many mornings i have had lately--

into some type of infatuation,
and then when i was bruised up enough
i climbed back out,
grabbed your hand,
and slipped back into something
that feels like love.

This time is for me, snipping away any of you.

It wasn't my plan to house a barren land
within my heart, you see.
As I walked all year, and fell in love,
everything was slowly taken from me.

It wasn't my plan to store a broken voice
within my throat, you see.
As I spoke all year, and shared my love,
I realized you never listened to me.

And now my feet are covered in dust,
it's desert in my mind and heart,
I am left behind, sad and lost,
but it's now that you want to restart.

Summer, you do not have to be a fleeting lover.

We plug up our ears
feeding music to our brain
so that the busy streets around
produce a dream-like state.

It's cold.
It's quiet.
I am cold
& I am quiet.
I feel cold.
To the touch,
in my organs,
& I hear quiet.
I hear everything
except for what I want to.
What I need to.

Quietly I sit, watching the cold waves of Lake Michigan
come crashing in, just like you & me.

Black licorice,
I don't wish
to be rich.
Money won't buy
happiness
but it'll get ya close.

What if on my way home I was in a car crash...
...I am fine,
but before you disappear a night at a time
let me know if you love me.
Miscommunication,
or needing space,
whatever we have doesn't need to be a race,
but let me know if you love me.

My dreamer heart is tied to you, dreamer.
I'll gaze out every window until you walk by.

staring into each other's eyes
aloud, we would recite, "you."

I told my sister how
we kissed for the first time
watching Juno. She asked
when in the movie, *I answered
from beginning to end.

Take cover,
take over.

If I could be in two places at once
I would have been able to tell you
that while I slept safely on my couch
I was being strangled within my dream,
no longer by you, but by another.

Fearful, unable to wake,
and yet, alive and okay.

Each new love sparks a promise of evergreen
And now I understand, now I am willing to see,
Peppered hair, twenty-six, glistening grays,
This is supposed to go another way,
this is the start of something else.

It's summertime and the weather's fine,
well at least it's supposed to be.
I've got the deepest burn upon my skin,
one that feels like I'm being pinched for every sin.

Though it's early June, we know the sun'll end too soon
and I've got a deep red burn upon my shoulders.
Under the sun there's a reminder of
When I was pushing boulders to get over you.

I was over you before the day was through,
now the color of blood has turned to golden wheat.
Under the sun, my shoulders and skin
have never felt so sweet.

I took the time to burn and heal,
I took the time to peal away any of you.

Where do we go when we die?
Are we destined for clouds,
fire or for dirt?
I'm still breathing, heart beating,
wondering why I feel
as though I have died.
Does every end hurt?

my breath sends clouds back to the sky
while bitter winds pull tears from my eyes.

It's when you sigh
after
I kiss you
deep
& the sound of our
laughter;
It's moments I want to
keep.

Buying more books than minutes to read,
It's a marvelous thing indeed.

did you notice the light go out in me?
of course not, when you always forget about me.
i feel the flame go out
snuffed to smoke
but i want the fire, the flame
what a joke.
i broke.

dotted hairs I'll shave until I die,
welcome to my inner thigh.

Your eyes, they sparkle for me on the weekend,
but when the work week hits, it hits hard
and you disappear and put up your guard.

I've told you once, twice, one hundred times
and I can't seem to penetrate your mind
enough to matter 9-5, someone else,
come and keep me alive.

I understand now that I was trying to force feed my love to a boy that knew his allergy.

He should have told me -- the chef of my love -- that he wasn't ready, wasn't able to eat.

He should have read the menu and politely declined.

And I may have sent him on his way and we both would have enjoyed a better suited meal to fuel

Rather than pour into a malnourished body, mind, spirit.

Give your time to a lady,
give your time to a gent.
The greatest gift you can give
is where your time is spent.

the pain is not in the unknown,
it is in the knowing

Look at your phone, now, and understand that it is me not returning effort to you.
Look at your hands, now, and feel that it is not me making you feel unscathed.
Look at your table, now, and notice my body not there.
Your mattress, too.

Look around you and see me, and then don't, because I am far beyond you.

for you to hear
in hopes that
I might listen.

glass-***** mammals flipping through channels
looking for the next bad news to fear.

I to focus on me
and you to focus on you.

The thrill of the chase is dead.

Tousled hair,
Friday's cologne,
I thirst to sip you up.

Some time had passed,
and she felt beneath her chin
a pool where tears had gathered
at the end of their streams.
Together. Still.
No longer flowing,
never falling,
simply there, defying gravity.

After you made the comment that we spent the past 48 hours together,
         as if you had been counting down the second- ticks on your watch,
         I spent the next 48 hours in my car,
         crying.
It was innocent enough, your comment.
& sometimes it feels nice to cry.

Please do not ever say that again.

When you don't put your passions to use,
leave them unmarked & unloved
in collectible cases up on the shelf,

When you don't put your gifts to test,
leave them wrapped & tucked away
in the corners of "some day,"

Do you feel like you are wasting your life, too?

Do flowers have the choice to grow?
Do we choose? Do you know?
Do branches have the choice whether to bend of break?
Is this life's course? Is it too much to take?
Does the wind choose when to blow?
Does it get to choose when to stand still?
Do leaves drop at their own free will?
Do trees long to age past our time?
Where are answers to these questions of mine?

Look inside, look around.
From Earth to sky back to the ground.