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Tatiana Feb 2015
Wake up and smell the dead roses,
walk with me through the burned fields,
dance with me in pouring rain,
and dodge the falling debris.
But be careful,
for you will realize
that you have been hit by falling debris,
the pouring rain is keeping you on the ground,
you're laying in the empty, burned fields,
with blackened rose petals covering your trembling body.
And when I say you
I mean myself,
for I feel that I am two,
I am me and I am you,
and we lay together on scorched earth
yet we lay apart and drowning in the rain.
Tatiana Feb 2015
Don't you understand that I am a poison?
I will take you down too.
So I dare you to bite me,
fight me,
I dare you,
because when you're enjoying your sweet victory,
i'll be swimming in your veins
slowly killing you
like you have killed me.
For I am your poison
and you are mine.
Tatiana Feb 2015
Her head is up in the clouds
and they are so soft and fluffy
as sweet as cotton candy
and she takes a bite even though
she knows it'll rot her teeth.
But of course she only tastes water,
as it was a cloud she bit
and she wonders how these fluffy cushions
even support her.
She probably shouldn't have wondered,
because she's falling now
through those soft clouds
that fade away on contact.
Free fall to the ground
where there is no candy
to sweetly rot her teeth,
where there are no clouds
to cushion her descent,
where there is nothing but
cold, solid earth
ready to break her
at the end of her fall.
Tatiana Feb 2015
It's 1:32 am
and I show no signs of sleeping
There's just this heavy weight on my chest
and I feel choked up.
There's pressure behind my eyes
and the tears are starting to come
and I don't know why.
But the more I sit here,
the more sad I become,
but when I pace I become angry
and then even more sad.
I don't understand why.
Everything is okay right now,
but i'm sad,
and it's stupid because I have no reason to be upset,
I just am.
The thing is
this has been happening for about a week
and I have been trying to be happy,
I have been forcing myself to smile
be optimistic
to laugh
to enjoy myself.
But for some reason,
it's just been so **** hard
as this inexplicable sadness is smothering me.
  Feb 2015 Tatiana
Nebulous the Poet
Sitting on a bench just off the
Liberty Trail in Boston, waiting as
the rest of my family made a restroom stop.
An old man with a thick, greyish
beard and heavy eyelids
took a seat next to me.
His ***** white hair caught
a cotton seed sailing through the air.

The bag of tobacco in his hand
was wide open, and he
pulled a roll of Zig-Zags
out of his pocket—he tore
the paper about six inches long
and proceeded to
roll a cigarette. His fingers,
bent and forlorn,
worked tediously as a
diamond cutter’s.

He lit the cigarette, let out a ring of smoke,
and introduced himself as
Lenny. I told him my name
and we talked for a few minutes.
"What brings you to Boston
young fella?" he said
in his aged Boston accent.
"Family vacation--personally, I'm
interested in all the history of the town."

By now his cigarette is
half-burnt, and my family is
ready to continue on the trail.
Lenny turned to me with
a low look in his eyes,
but he cracked a smile.
He had a couple teeth missing

Before I got up he said to me,
“When I want to sit and think,
a cigarette isn’t long enough
to burn through my thoughts,
but a conversation with a
stranger every day
is what keeps my mind
from running away in smoke.”
Tatiana Feb 2015
I bit my tongue so hard that it bled,
but I never said a single word
and there's a heavy weight that's on my neck
it rolls lifelessly from the thoughts in my mind.
I carry the burden of my aching head,
full of thoughts that my mouth has not conquered
and I don't have anyone to check
to see if my mind is something they could find.
My lips stay sealed completely
locking my words in my own head,
and I think I may have thrown away the key,
for my words refuse to escape me.
This is from an old problem I had many months ago.... I once didn't say a single word for an entire week and it felt wrong to keep staying silent about it. In a way i'm breaking my past silence.
  Feb 2015 Tatiana
Helen
He stood in the doorway
watching her sleep
His hands pressed
to his chest
whispering promises
he could not keep

He stood right next to her
his hand trembling, mid air
took one step back, then another
so he was no longer there

She lay upon sheets of silk
her back a work of Art
her scissored legs and arms
flung wide,
as though she was torn apart

She waited with breath held tight
her eyes closed and lungs burning
She wanted as though
time was right
Her world was centred
with her yearning

He hesitated to touch
such fragile beauty
his encroachment in her space
seemed an impregnable fortress
so he stood back
just to stare at her face

But she had raised the portcullis
and lowered the drawbridge

He just needed to storm
the castle
and dwell forever
where she lives
after story: but he never did, he never took what he wanted, he stood outside and waited to be asked in, she eventually raised the drawbridge and shut the gate.
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