I liked to feel
Yours hands
Not quite on my
waist
but just below my
ribs.
you'd put your hands
there then
pull me forward
Till our chests touched
and we were one.
you'd look into my eyes
And I could see what
you were thinking.
I'd lay my head down
with my right ear
Over your heart so
I could hear it get
Faster
And faster
and faster
Till one day
It stopped.
and I looked up into
Your eyes and
they were gone.

Nothing will last.
And eventually one of you will leave.
Because no matter how much
you wanted to save someone from drowning,
you will always be busy
trying to save yourself from the flood.

Sitting here trying to make small talk, I'm going insane, we're all insane.
Broken topics over chips and salsa, god its so bizarre, I don't understand how "normal" we all are.
I keep my mouth semi-full so I'm unable to speak, I can't stand myself, ****, why am I so weak?
Why does this bother me so? It's like no one even knows,
the truth,
be told it's a mess, I can't stand too much more of this, someone relieve me from this **** before it makes me sick..
All the underlying problems...drink to numb the pain but those same drinks taketh life away.
And I don't mean with death, for life still moves on, but it's broken into pieces and it's better off gone.
Cause one needs it to stay strong and the other knows that lifestyle is wrong:
Substances don't bring you happiness, they don't fix your pain, they ruin relationships and families all the same.
But we sat and we talked, topics in no particular range, and what hurts is seeing how things both have and haven't changed.
The connection is there, but the love has departed; neither hope nor intention to go back and restart it.
And now we're driving away and nothing is said, no mention of the insanity that hides in my head,
No acknowledgement to the tears I watch my own mom fight back..similar to the sick truth the whole situation lacked.

Another case of missing you
And all I have are empty pill bottles
And broken picture frames
Scattering my carpet

I've lost the will to suffer the poison of my mind
And the frailty of my heart
Loose-leaf love notes lay unwritten
Begging to be finished

The ache that writhes inside my chest is your absence
And the miracle of your voice
Faded daydreams fight through the nightmares
Yearning for sincerity in their actions

Inside misty lullabies are arising heart palpitations
And thoughts of "what could've been"
Ephemeral kisses mask my lips
Raging for redemption

Unaligned stars failed to hold us together
And seal our dearest fate
Trite misunderstandings hide my frowns
Beneath the surface of reality

Half-bitten apples like fragments of my heart disperse on the floor
And attract anxious ants
Hallow stomaches crave more than the necessity of nutrients
It requests psychological fulfillment

Swallowed confessions you continue to choke on
And repeating apologies
Distrusting anchors hold me back from the words I wish to say
Begging for love

An ocean, of salty tears
Drip onto the tastebuds that always adored you
And suddenly- nostalgic eyes are all I see
In the mirror