I'm not trying to end my pain
Just bleeding through my pen.
A white page for the dark days,
And a little paper for my wet eyes

My beating heart a kick for this sad song, words burning paper only to be put out by tears

When I write , I tell you a story, of how good will finally take the glory.
Then I'll see a smile crack as you read,
Because you also write to take away your misery

So you see,
I've been lost my entire life.

With never ending pathways,
I'm scared to choose,
Not knowing where each leads.

There's too many paths
I'm not sure what to do.
Because you see,
I've been lost in these pathways my entire life.

Eyes brighter than the sun that acts as my heat in this cold world,
the smiles on their faces,
their loving embraces,
locked in each-others arms;
I'm tangled in the limbs of roughed-skinned trees and faceless barks.

A slap in the face from the wind is my kiss on the cheek,
their shelter is the roof above their head,
mine the endless blue sky.

Blue is all I've ever known.
I feel blue, I see blue,
faces turn into oceans at the sight of me;
they turn cold, they get scared, they rush at me like strong waves.
I cannot swim, I am drowning beneath the body [of water]
I have admired and adored.

My fantasies and dreams shoot at me with guns and sharp objects;
the one who could've understood me
was protected by those who think they understand him;
I can no longer keep running into the ocean
just to be continuesly thrown back to shore.

He throws me out to sea,
but yells at me when he steps on the  sharp pieces of me.

I am only a shell;
I am fragile.

You're yelling at me for hurting you,
you're the one who hurt me.

(NJ2015) All Rights Reserved

Arrogant fool across the land
Holds powers in his hand
And rules the weaklings with a sword
Telling them your say must not be told
Killing whom he wishes to ****
Making his people believe it's a daily drill
But some fine men always rebel
Filled with desire to end this hell
Gathering as many people as they can
Driven by their desire to have a free life span
They decide to attack the rotten one
Ending this misery that he calls fun
They destroyed the palace walls
The lair of the corrupted finally falls
The rotten king never put up a fight
For he was just bark and no bite

“Depression does not always mean
Beautiful girls shattering at the wrists
 A glorified, heroic battle for your sanity
 or mothers that never got the chance to say good-bye
Sometimes depression means
Not getting out of bed for three days
Because your feet refuse to believe
That they will not shatter upon impact with the floor
Sometimes depression means 
That summoning the willpower 
To go downstairs and do the laundry
 is the most impressive thing you accomplish that week
Sometimes depression means
Lying on the floor staring at the ceiling for hours
Because you cannot convince your body 
That it is capable of movement
Sometimes depression means
 Not being able to write for weeks 
Because the only words you have to offer the world 
Are trapped and drowning and I swear to God I’m trying
Sometimes depression means 
That every single bone in your body aches 
But you have to keep going through the motions
 beacuse  you are not allowed to call in to work depressed
Sometimes depression means
 ingnoring every phone call for an entire month
 because yes, they have the right number
But you’re not the person they’re looking for, not anymore"