#qwert poems on Hello Poetry

Nobody 9h

10 years of drawing
9 years of being friends
8 years of being bullied
7 years of being bullied by you
6 years of guilt
5 years of trying to fit in
4 years of writing poetry
3 years of letting you manipulate me
2 years of knowing something was wrong with our friendship
1 year of trying to tell you
0 years of freedom

I am not 10 years old, that would be weird af, this is just the years i remember the most.

#toxicfriends #ugh #qwert #jerks #bully

Nobody 1d

anxiety IIII

anxiety affects
my fragile heart
you can't make it stop
when someone already made it start

anxiety affects
my useless head
asking me "what's going on?"
and "why am i not dead?"

anxiety affects
my confused soul
makes it ask more questions
makes me want to hode in a hole

#anxiety #qwert

Nobody 2d

Elders

Waiting for the worst
Because in 8 days
They will come
The family
The elders
I think people need to stop saying
"Respect your elders."
Because why should i respect them
If they don't respect me

Respect is earned
Not demanded
So maybe
You should stop calling me she
Or transphobic comments
And start treating me like the grandson i am

Grandpa addicted to cannabis
Grandma addicted to alchohol
Their garage reaks if sadness
I think the reason they do this to themselves
Is because they might hate me for who i am
But I think they hate themselves more

Yup my grandparents are coming over for thanksgiving, wish me luck because transphobia isnt their only tactic.

#grandparents #qwert #family #transphobia

Nobody 2d

changing room

today
i was changing after PE
(in the girls locker room, of course.)
too scared to come out to the school.
i was changing out of the blueberry colored sweatpants
when a girl commented
"how did you get those cuts?"
"do you have a cat or something?"
and i just stood there
like a rabbit
hoping
that if i freeze
they won't be able to see me
they ask me if i'm okay
...
i ran away

i know
that i have problems
but i think that they're starting
to turn into issues

#selfharm #qwert

Nobody 5d

Relapse

Slice
Slice
Slice
I told myself i wasnt addicted
Cut
Cut
Cut
I was doing so well
Scrape
Scrape
Scrape
Got in a fight with my friend
Bleed
Bleed
Bleed
Why do I do this to myself...

Blood bleeds through my jeans
Red blotches, displaying my shame
My pain
Yet they still believe me when i say im ok

I got in a fight with my friend. She and i had a lot of rough patches through the last couple years. I admitted to her i made some mistakes but she refuses to recognize that she literally left me with trauma and says that i was just being a *******. She refuses to see my side of the story. We just finished the fight over text and i got the urge to... yeah. I was clean for 5 days. Haha thats a personal record for me since august. How dumb of me to think that i could go a week without it. Am i the problem??? Did i make the mistake??? Also for context this isn't what i meant by my main trauma source, just part of it. Not ready to talk about the other part yet

#selfharm #qwert #******* #toxic #addiction #relapse

Nobody 5d

Skip

Skipping school
Avoid the reminders
Say i feel sick
Say i feel tired
Friends worried
Keep missing
Skipping
Avoiding
Ignoring school.
Avoid these people
At all costs
A list of a sidewalk
To skip down on
When I want to feel pain
Because thats all you brought to me
Skipping school...
Avoid the reminders...
Say i feel sick...
Say i feel tired...

#mentalhealth #qwert #haha #skipping #school

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