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Kelsey Lauren Oct 2016
Why would I change for you?
Believe me, I wanted to.
But at the same time I wasn't going to sacrifice my personality.
All of the things that represent my originality.
I thought with you it might be different.
My identity is not insignificant.
So I told you to simply get out.
Because apparently appearance is all you care about.
Not gonna lie...
I was super mad/frustrated when  I wrote this
Susan Jacob Oct 2016
In the stillness of that split second,

my tawny eyes recognized those woods:

for, It was a familiar bend.

woods all dark and serene as they stood.

I drew my cape closer,

my movements prudential and slower

I heard footsteps behind me;

I turned,my mind dancing with glee

but my face was soon set on a sigh,

for my dreams never came by

I closed my eyes a second time

to succumb to the darkness and stillness of the glen.

A breeze touched me with it’s silent chime;

I felt light spewing in that lion’s den.

Light vanished the dark veil that covered the beauty of nature,

a beauty that nothing in this world could attain as a feature,

the divinity that none could seizure,

the beauty that we destroy for leisure.

I hated to look back to my worldly life

because ,it only bought me sorrow.

I was carried far away,away from that sharp knife.

The beauty around me seemed to stimulate the beauty within me

giving me a better hope for tomorrow.

I had been there; amidst those lilies and heather in every weather

but,I was expecting someone,in that silent ether.

my hair danced in the morning air like a feather,

I knew that something should bring us together.

My heart skipped a beat,I saw her once again

I extended my pale hands to her

she held them,anger and agony silently drained

from my finger tips,for her mind was soft and pure as fur.

Nobody could describe the love I had for that world

where, I could lose myself like an innocent child;

where, the pain of past wounds were to be shed;

the place where the light of imagination led.

I was held back from venturing my imagination,

for they told me to live in the reality,

but,did they knew the painstaking frustration

that,involved the idea of staying back,blocked from glee?

Now that I can’t go back

to that world where hate seemed to lack

I have to die in this menacing shack.

Maybe, one day i’ll be remembered in a clack
It's actually about a woman who lives in two different scenarios.
One in the real world and another in her imagination.
Jet Rose Oct 2016
BPD
I hear the vacant screams within my mind, I wait for the day to melt  into the sublime.

How did I get so sick? The devil Parades my existence and pokes my sensitive skin with a stick.

I value solitude, just enough to devour my loneliness, this wretched illness I suffer alone, I pray to my soul to take me home.
Kristie Townsend Sep 2016
I feel numb, stuck, trapped
My insecurities get worse each day
I miss my extroverted self
I don't know where I've gone?

I'm existing;  not living
I'm not unhappy, I am not sad
I'm apathetic : neither here nor there

No movement,  nothing changes
Yet my life, my home, myself ...
Have changed beyond recognition

I am using this nothingness to heal
Educate, restore, fix, mend
In the stillness, I find my soul
My brain refuses to acknowledge it

Mindset is in quandary,  undecided
Body is aging before my own eyes
Soul is vulnerable , yet open
Honesty is blunt, uncomfortable for some, but necessary

Old friends question and probe
New friends acquired along the road
Baggage weighs heavy
I can not put it down

These are the ramblings of the mentally unwell
Emotionally unstable, is my label
I wear it well: you really couldn't tell
Unless you are reading this

I'll pretend and disguise the panic in my eyes
Censor my language, no triggers spoken
Not to alarm, not to self harm
Just keep quiet, be good, continue to be misunderstood
Kristie Townsend Sep 2016
24.07.07 - by Kristie Townsend
3 October 2009 at 17:36

In a darkened pit
a space in which I seem to fit
despair, fear, my escorts here
and paranoia chased hard at my rear

been given a label
a title, of which I am quite able
to stick upon my frowning forehead
whilst still wishing I was dead

suicidial emotions
irrational words spoken
secret ritual, daily self harm
like starvation and cutting my arm

plaster on that fake grin
take it all on my chin
never to surrender, never to give in
for I am merely another child borne of sin
Kristie Townsend Sep 2016
cutting ties that bind - by Kristie


So I cut myself with a knife

just to see if I can still feel any thing in this pathetic life

But I feel nothing at all

as I watch my crimsom blood fall



I score my skin, deeper and deeper, push the knife in

nothing..... not even a sting...absolutely nothing

I fantically seek a virginal place I can carve, cut away my hate

self loathing, disgust, as I look at myself, what a ******* state



Waiting to faint, as my blood seeps and escapes

but as if mocking me, I have to wait

relief comes at a price, a deadly cost

and reminds me of all that i've lost



tired and sleepy, waiting for death to collect me

I've planned for no one to save me, finally be free

one last slice, just to ensure

deep across artery, my blood pumps no more
#borderlinepersonalitydisorder #mentalhealthawareness #suicideprevention #myjourneythroughmadness #LETSTALK #semicolonproject #mentalhealthawareness #endstigma #RethinkMentalIllness #Addictionkills
Kristie Townsend Sep 2016
D.N.A RESULTS by Kristie Townsend (23.07.07)


patiently I wait for the pain to stop
for blackness to overwhelm my fractious senses
for death to soothe my destroyed emotions
for eternal silence to end my indifferent pretenses

but even drug induced comas
or the gift of life, twice
leaving my children, or those whom proclaim to care
are enough of an incentive for me to wish to remain here

I lost my daddy, Eric, Mr T
I betrayed myself, I fell apart
I believed the DNA results would set me free
instead they broke my fragile heart

But the universe and life unfolds as indeed it should
although not always as I would like or desire
and one day, when I look back
Im sure Ill be glad that It wasnt my time to expire
My Journey Through Madness
Mark Lecuona Sep 2016
I live in my own mind,
but it is open for you to travel
My opinions play by one rule,
the truth of the matter
If I don't know
then I will have no opinion until I know
My voice relies upon temperance,
but first I will pause
What I believe is personal,
I hope my actions are enough
I value your freedom and mine,
coexistence
All I know is who I love
and they will know it too
What I advise is balance
and empathy
If you wish to change me,
I'm not for you
If you have a life,
I can respect you
If you understand me,
I could love you
To live alone is not rejection,
only discovery
To live together is about the soul,
will it survive?
Kristie Townsend Sep 2016
Epitaph (by KT)
19 September 2012 at 12:11

Write me a poem.
Use the words you were born with,
The words you grew up with,
The words you speak everyday of your life.


Don't bring me a rose from a garden you did not grow.
Better the thick green stalk of a ****
Grown wild and unbidden
Behind the steps of your back porch.
Better a handful of parched grass
Plucked fitfully from your own lawn.

Write me a poem
And let me hear your voice.
Unsmooth, raucous,
Irritating as the sound of a rusty tricycle trundling by.

Let me see your face.
Scarred and uncared for,
Unwashed and unshaven,
Tender and sad.

Write me a poem
And deliver it to my mossy grave
With a ragged bunch of flowers
Planted and picked by your hand
And read me your words.

I WILL LISTEN.

And beneath the earth
And upon the winds
And across the seas
I will sound my applause
In the song of the tiny sparrow
As she flies forever home.
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