my friends are like flies
focusing only on ****
and living short

all dyng

they drop like flies

like death from above;
you left me,
bereft of thought.
as if blessed by a devil,
or behest from a god.
your lullabies used to fit like a glove,
as long as they were stories without plot.
just like our made up memories of swans and doves.
they twisted and turned,
like the noose that we tied,
around what we swore wasn't our love.

so, off with my head.

all i want to do is sleep,
until i try to go to bed.

again,
relive all the words that you said.

all i want to do is die,
but i'll keep living on instead.

**** me.
Words calmly exiting my mouth
Staring you dead in the eyes
My feeble form reflected
Within your teary blue eyes

I can see myself
Collapsed on the floor
No strength left in my body
No will left to fight anymore

You're holding it
Firmly in your hand
The sharp edged blade
Its so cold and so smooth

My crimson red blood dripping down
You're standing in horror
Unable to make a sound
Towering above me

The bathroom is silence
As my words echo throughout
You're shaking with such anger
With such confusion and doubt

W h y
You say in the most fragile voice
Its like you're the one breaking
I thought you would rejoice

Because you're the only one who can do it
The only one who can help me

The air around us tightens
Surrounding us with pressure
Its making me breathless
He's the only one who can put me together

I'm staring him down
I'm just a void of emotion
No visible feelings
Its so clear that I'm broken

**** me.
I repeat
He falls to his knees
He crawls over to me

Holds me within his embrace
Squeezing me tightly
As if I am to disappear
Before whispering quietly

We can get through this
Get through this together

My tears begin to pour
As my mask begins to break
Pain and sadness overwhelms me
All the cuts and scars begin to ache

But I was relieved
As he knew the truth behind what I said
That my desperate plea was for help
Rather then wanting to be dead

He knew
That while I sat there
Holding tightly
onto that blade

That while I was screaming **** me
He heard the words  Heal me

hey man,
it's me.
your son.

it's okay if you forgot.
i'm just that scratch ticket,
that you never won.
just a ***** scab,
that you never even thought about picking at.

oh, the introductions, i almost forgot.
i was going to ask you,
what your name was, and whatnot.
but that'd take more patience than i've got.

i'm done waiting,
for a half-assed misfit *******,
who doesn't know how to commit to his kid.
i don't know if i'll ever be able to forgive you,
or any of the things that you never ****** did.

but hey man,
that's just my piece,
and i've only got one.
so write back.

sincerely,

your son.

the champagne starts to taste like ash
as you fast crash, burn and start to rain like dust and soot.
quick, backtrack and rehash where it went wrong.
the vents, did they pop? did they bleed? did they clot?
plunder your gut, misplace your trust and start to let it rot.

i can't help but think
that you were my missing puzzle piece
nothing lasts, i'll stop to drink
as i wash the blood
from my bathroom sink

i can't help but dream
every night, about some kind of love
drowning in red mud
choking on words once mumbled

i can't help but wish
that i never happened
to you
or you to me
so tonight i'll drink, dream,
rinse, repeat

until my memories lapse
as i collapse, shimmer and sheen
in a tiled room, never dimmer
than within my dreams

riding highs and moral fences,
wasting their senses,
until they're senseless.