My hair is thinning
My bones are creaking
I feel the cold breeze hit every vertebrae as I assend into a room.
My bones are more like spikes now.
Jabing everthing I touch.
You must handle me gently.
For the lightest squeeze can bruise me.
When my trouble began i was an insperation.
But now, I dont recognize who i am.

She gazed up into the indigo night sky
Saw the twilight moon eclipsed
Like an unknown planet dark but visible
Had smothered the light
Apart from one sliver cresented
On the edge where black became blue

I followed
Through the piercing breeze
Needing to get out
I stayed inside, I couldn't breath

We sneaked through the underbrush
Feeling improbable and alive
The stars made us feel at home
With you I felt less alone
Creeping along some old man's back yard
Lying on the grass, your hand in mine
Trying not to remember, trying our best
To stop time and our hearts from beating

I used to have a horrible case of giving a ****
Sometimes you have to learn to quit that ****
Cause life will try to ***** a nail into the tip of your ****
Bust a fist in your *** that doesn’t fit
The kind of pain that you are ill-equipped to handle
This doesn’t mean I don’t love the world
I’ve just decided that I don’t have to be part of it
I’m just along for the ride on a separate lane
Off the track on a separate train
So I can finally stuff the pain of failed expectations
Where it belongs

2015 and as I look back
I cannot find the heart to laugh
Losses build shadow blocks
Oil and rot that clog tired arteries
Cracking my positive disposition

Today I understand incoherent rage
Learned the loss of my best disposition
With the youtube clip
Of a felt tipped double dipped *******
Spitting ******* about how the government
Is coming to **** him

Pleading please help me by killing them
Empty brained slack jawed hee haw
Huffing the exhaust fumes from some
Sixteen mile a gallon extended cab
Four-wheel drive ford truck

Chubby face running of with
Nineteen twenties style militia hate
Red neck panting and paranoid
Rallying others to his cause
With sloppy sentiments and stupid slurs

No information or reason
From this white entitled flat earth creationist
Spewing patriotism and treason
In the same stank skoal scented breath

Afraid of the Muslims, Communists,
Socialist, and Intellectual atheist

Won’t wait to debate with facts
Cause facts are what he lacks
Just rash reactions with explosive violence
Beating up protesters to the point of silence

Reality ******* in favor of
Slow pre-used slogans with no clarity

I am getting so tired of this
Same old ****

I don't feel here anymore.
It's as if as the seconds go by,
I'm disappearing.
Dissolving
into nothing.
And there isn't anything
I can do
to stop it.
I'm slipping
farther and
farther
away
from life,
and closer
and closer
to oblivion.

**I'm in too much pain to fight a war that isn't worth it.