She once told me
she was terribly afraid of
the 889 blades of grass
in the park down her street,
of the 889 worn books
in her local library
of the 889 gum-covered steps
to her bus stops
of the 889 looks
she must make over her shoulder
of the 1 778 pairs of greedy eyes
stealing looks away from me.

I missed her when she sent me pictures
because I couldn't bear to look
at empty frames of empty eyes
(red dows no match red
unless it is the scarlet of blood on broken glass
after a year and two months of tranparency)
and also because the things that slipped into my phone
could only remind me of moments that could never be
and dreams
that would never come true.

I don't know what to say to her
without breaking her
(like the broken glass)
(the image still hasn't left my head)
but she inspires me toward metaphors
and the adromeda galaxy
isn't so far away anymore.

How can I stay by her side
when she triggers me to want to fall
but how can I ignore her call
when she is the only person I feel safe with
to coincide

I am afraid to tell her
(or myself)
how I feel
because in a cliche
I don't know how I feel myeslf
but dear, together, we are formidable
and apart --
I don't know about you,
but I catch myself on the dry spells --
we are fort minable

this song has been stuck in my hear
since it reminded me of you
and this could be another metaphor for something heartfelt
and not altogether original

But I want us to be
the figures in the painting
you said you saw us in
I want to be
that feminist duet
(even if I can't sing and you voice is that of the devil's)
I want to be
the cats in the picture
with the intertwined tails
or the flowers tangled up
on a vine
(I was going to send you that on
but I thought against it
because you were too beautiful to be compared
to a simple petrichor-scented bougainvillea)

So I will be
the 889 poetry books
you dog-ear and highlight
and secretly slightly plagiarize
and I will be
the 889 plants growing
in your backyard,
sparkling for you like replacement diamonds
after the rain
(and better yet I will be the forest
of 889 trees
looming not frighteningly but protectively
over you)
and I will be
the 889 strides
of golden brick road
to follow to your favorite coffee shop every day
and I will be
the 889 innocent peaks
at a delicate pinkie finger or a nose
(because a delicate rose such as you
cannot be seen all at once and truly appreciated)
and I will even be
the 1 778 pairs of eyes
stealing my own looks,
and hopefully you will not be afraid anymore.

I will split myself
into
6 228 parts
to make you feel comfortable
and if this is not a love poem
then it is an apology
and gratitude
and anger/resentment/not really/how could I resent you/you are everything

what I'm trying to say is,
we could go so many different ways,
and what's one more expression of love to you
after all you've been through.

I will plagiarize your soul

The Pen
The pick up the pen;
The put it down again
(That sunken feeling, nemesis or friend?)
The pen. The Pen.
The pacing, the pressing up against
The period. Stop stopping
Again. Pick it up to put it down.
Pointless. Pshaw.
Please.
Please me simplicity. C’mon!
C’mon pen lemme pick it up
And put something down.

I’ll plagiarize the flow for a few words of my own.
I’m looking for inspiration from the great beyond.
My muse is missing.
I know the medium is a constraint.
I know inside
The set of symbols paints
Me into a corner.  The parameters
Of my pen’s head worn out. I’m ******. The metaphors
Pressed. The pen is second-guessed.

A literate piece of poetic license,

The defense mechanism
Against the prison I impose.
Me, myself, and I inside
The pen pining for a purpose.
The nexus of picking it up and putting it down
Is perplexing me, is vexing
Me like a sticky keyboard key.
So, I’m putting it all down
With the pen.

The pen.
The picking it up: who cares?
The putting it down: pensive prohibition.
The picking up; what I left out.
The putting it down: polygraph precision.
The picking up where I left off:
The putting it down: priority, what’s left of me.
The picking it up, when I don’t even know
Why I bother?
The putting it down: passion
The putting it down: plea of let me be.  
The putting it down periscope; I’m diving under  
The pressure’s mounting; I’m down for the counting on my muse
To bring me back
From that inky black abyss once again
My personal sonar is
Probing the depths, of what lies
hidden within
the pen.

In long lasting fortitude is the fight of the astute.
A lot of effort is made towards the war of the moral.
And a race towards life is the route.
Preparing the endless fit of strength of all.
There is he who is choosing his fate.
Working hard despite all opposers’ bait.
There is he who is choosing life.
Working hard despite all opposers’ strife.
Lost in the dirt, seeking out of the ruse.
Forced towards the light, brighter and rife.
No letting up despite the refuse.

Clean is the proud, and happy, the player of the flute.
A rite of passage for all is the praise of the immortal.
War is the only dispute
Death is not fatal.
The renegade does not enter the gate.
He is stuck outside the city, and left without state.
The renegade does not know his wife.
He is stuck at heart and can’t even play a fife.
In the dirt he is and is with a lot of abuse.
He cannot escape the knife.
Cut, cutting up despite the accuse.

Reality is but the face of cute.
Subjected to falsified doctrine and the immoral.
It is callous and as rotten fruit.
Moxie exists with everyone no matter how small.
Can the one who is happy learn to hate?
Only he or she can solve this debate.
Finally the long absent sky above the Alewife.
Can’t say that I have seen such teeming wildlife...
Swimming in a sea of its Muse.
The lowly continue their sighs
But I do proudly diffuse.


.This plight of mine is hard to toot.
Exemplified by my emphasis on the astral.
With which I dress in an armoured suit.
So my enemies do not mute my oral.
and the skies do tell in high rate,
How esteemed they are on time and ne’er late.
But giving ever virtuous despite
All those dead or dying, without prospect of afterlife.
It is their way to choose:
The dark abyss of guise,
(or) The gentle river of blue

For now I do keep silent, But still I commute,
With those of higher propositions and goal,
So I do instill thyself a deeper root.
In the waterbed truly formal.
Those who truth ‘I do navigate’
and those of lies ‘I do alienate’
At a loss O’ man or mesmerize,
Work harder on thoughts than just plagiarize.
The foes of old are still and sleuth
I show them love and they in lies are baptized
Tradition is there with purpose, don’t misuse.

I see to it the wise stay wise,
For better they will strategize.
And the unwise, wisdom they will pursue.
Giving them their much needed paradise.
And the lost I will use.

the vagrant, a pretense
letting light in tiniest cracks
on the pavement, again
wherever did i pass out
seizing the Ssseferoth sufferer syndrome
sinking in this suffragette
i am almost a cough away from zeitgeist

the world complained
the gods , sure they listened
but only with a nuisances negation  
does the noose hang higher
nonsense st of patient anger

plagiarize my past lives
seal my fate with cement
pavement, how do i feel you
when my ashes scatter

how do i fill you with children,
cracks seeping sin and sensation
eradicated slowly by noiseless geraniums

What's your name? I'm not so sure I should tell you mine you seem like the type of guy I've known in the past. I always fall for someone that everyone says I shouldn't am I really that blind? I like your brown hair, it matches your eyes they're deep and pregnant trying to explode but you prefer to hide all of those lies. Are you capable of changing my mind? You smell like my past, the mix of cheap cologne and the thick smoke of cigarettes battling against each other but neither coming ahead. I hate to be so blunt, or is that what I'm supposed to say I don't want to seem arrogant, your teeth are straight and white your smile might make me forget everything I'm afraid to let go of can I see it one more time? Maybe we should keep it like this, stay lovers and never be friends. Use fake names and plagiarize words we both need to hear because your face tells me your heart is as broken as mine and neither of us want to love each other. Let's get drunk off of generic light beer and turn off all the lights. I just want to taste the stale menthol lingering on your breath trying to escape the malted beverage failing to cleanse your mouth, I need to absorb your kiss to remember a night so long ago, I want to close my eyes and go back in that moment where ignorance was my only friend. I'll pretend to be her if you pretend to be him, because we both deserve this desirable sin.

-----------------------------------------------------------­-----------------------------


Hey.
What's your name?
I'm not so sure I should tell you mine.
So please don't speak a word of truth.
You seem like the type of guy I've known in the past.
Dangerous and broken,
Tormented and dark.
I always fall for the ones I'm not supposed to.
Am I really that blind?
I like your brown hair,
Or maybe it's more black.
Either way
It matches your eyes
So deep and pregnant trying to explode,
but I can tell you prefer to hide all of those lies.
Are you capable of changing my mind?
You smell like my past,
the mix of cheap cologne and the thick smoke of cigarettes,
battling against each other but neither coming ahead.
I hate to be so blunt, or is that what I'm supposed to say?
I don't want to seem arrogant, but I think I just might.  
Your teeth are straight and white, beautiful in a way.
Your smile might make me forget everything I'm afraid to let go of,
Even if it's just for  today.
Will you burn me with your happy pain one more time?
Maybe we should keep it like this,
Stay lovers and never be friends.
Use fake names and plagiarize words we both need to hear,
because your face tells me your heart is as broken as mine
and neither of us are capable of loving each other.
Let's get drunk off of  this generic light beer,
Turn off all the lights.
I want to taste the stale menthol lingering on your breath
trying to escape the malted beverage failing to cleanse your mouth,
I need to absorb your kiss to remember a night so long ago.
I want to close my eyes and go back in that moment where ignorance was my only friend.
I'll pretend to be her if you pretend to be him,
because we both deserve this desirable sin.

A tear is shed
For those who are blind to the beauty of this world
Who can only feast on sarcasm, writhing in irony
        *It soon evaporates.
Pictures of a future dressed in ribbons and lace, cast off and burned
Pictures of the future carrying disdainful dystopia, infamous for invalids
Hung to admire in sublime distaste by those that seek knowledge
And see the repetitious antiquities of time that come to pass
        But others care not for plans and the imminent
Those that keep to the light of the gas
And carry the past to the present
Hoping for trends to try again, reliving what they had never lived
Laconic and loquacious in emotions and words
Against the gossip, but paradoxically
Pushing for the creation of their “ritualistic social Golgotha”.
Those who abuse the glory of their munificent, malicious mentality
Pathetically unable to procure authentic happiness
       A tear is shed.
Inside the recesses of the soul where emotions dare not dwell.
       It too evaporates.
Trapped in fear and the “cliched harlequin speech of suicide”
Begging for the masses to cast them out and find each other
       A tear is shed.
Never seen but felt as it evaporates.
Felt by those who envelop themselves inside themselves
Those who plagiarize their sick self-conscious souls
Those who bring about the very misfortune they strive to devour
Those who are effortlessly envied as they exploit their habitual recreations
       By those who wouldn’t dream of falsified euphoria
Those who bastardise and deface the name of creative individualism
As waters of the soul are purged and discarded
       They are felt by those
And are quickly washed away in doubt and regret
Keeping to the light of the gas, dangerous and warm

Sitting here
Waiting, wishing, wanting,
I can't even focus.
The distraction of you pervades my mind's eye.
Write it down, the eye tells me
As if it were the messenger perched upon my shoulder.
Each breath that crawls in and out of my lungs feels heavy;
Saturated with wishful thoughts and flickering candle light
Like shards of glass
Shining and reflecting the unseen.
The wind blows cold here.
Can you feel it too?
When I was young, the teachers said I had a vivid imagination.
They deemed me "creative"
Because I liked to play pretend.
That 8-letter C word hasn't left me since.
I still like to play pretend, so
Let's make believe we can touch.
Put that scene on repeat please.
Ever since I was young I've had this vivid imagination.
The night I cried a monsoon for lack of you,
Somewhere between each breath lost
I found a realization of epic proportions.
I sat with myself in the dim light,
My arms wrapped around me,
White knuckles,
Cradling this vessel that felt hollow as a canoe,
Pretending the arms weren't mine, but yours.
Wanting.
In bed with the blankets tucked around my silhouette
And your thoughts in words cradled in my hands,
I can imagine your front against my back
And your warm breath on my neck.
I can almost feel… a rush of blood to my heart.
Name that song.
Sorry I have to plagiarize that thought but it comes so easily.
A rush of blood straight to the core.
Pumping, pulsing
Sometimes I just sit alone with my heart.
Close my eyes and listen to what it has to say.
It seems to tell me, hey I'm keeping your engine running, but you have to do the rest.
And I say a prayer for that motor inside my chest that keeps everything flowing
But I know that it won't do it all for me.
Isn't it miraculous to be alive?
Earlier today I thought: my God, do I have trust issues.
I'm confused about what's real and about how to believe.
I've been told plenty of things that aren't true
Like how pluto is a planet...
Just kidding it's only a moon.
But who's to say it's only a moon?
My moon is your moon and that seems pretty swell to me.
People say it's a comfort to look up
And know you see the same moon as someone far away.
Maybe I'll take that for truth.
Might as well.
What've I got to lose?
On second thought I might want to avoid that question.
What have I got to lose?
My head, my heart, my sanity...
It's a question for another day.
But for now I'm sitting here
Wishing, waiting, wanting
For my make-believe to get real already
And for all my distraction fantasy to spring to life.

"Boots for sale . Boots for sale.
Who will buy my beautiful boots?
They are crafted with broken hands,
Designed individually, beautiful boots."

"What is the price of these beautiful boots
Crafted so carefully with broken hands."
"The price is a pure heart within a dead body
Resurrected, clean, by the Blood of the Lamb."

"What will I do with these boots you are selling me?
Where will they take me, all washed in this Blood?
They will take you to mountains all craggy, majestic.
They'll never wear out till you complete the job."

"And what is the job I must do with these boots on me?
Where are these mountains that soon I must climb?"
"These mountains are everywhere. Cast your eyes round you.
Their summits are glorious, their victory sublime.

It's you who must yearn for them, cry for them, live for them,
You who must ***** up them breathing your fire,
You who must plant our flags right on the crest of them,
Make them the cynosure of human desire.'

'How can I yearn for them, cry for them, live for them,
***** up their rocky tracks yet breathing fire.
How can I carry a great waving flag up them
Too many enemies . Think I'll retire.'

"You're not a Jonah. I bred you for greater things.
I'll deal with enemies they're in my hands.
Yours is the task just to excel in holiness -
Every wee part of it. Holiness stands!

Simply draw near to Me. History is in my heart.
Use your great talents and display My name.
Hide not your trust in Me. Speak it out joyfully.
Just be ye perfect and true without shame.

These boots will not wear out. They'll reach the mountain peaks.
Seven tall mountains you'll claim for the flag.
Look at the enemy. They'd like what you have!
So you can give it them. More to be had.

But don't plagiarize my Name, hide the annointing.
Shout from the rooftops that JESUS IS LORD!
Do not pretend My blood can be rejected
While yet all My blessings are cutely absorbed.

This is the lie that all men must face up to.
I am the Truth that will light up the way.
You are the torches I chose from eternity
You are the ones who will light up the day.

You are the troopers who'll take every mountain.
You will not flinch before death. It is dead!
You climb those mountains and take them for Jesus
The bridegroom who's coming so soon to be Head.

These are the mountains I've named for the taking.
Media first, moved by terror and fear.
You will redeem it by truthful reporting
And seeing the visions that Jesus holds dear.

Second is Government. Take its high places.
Don't be afraid of its big brother frown.
Third, Education, the heart of our children
Who need, above all things, in Truth to be grown.

Fourth are the Finances. Greed is the notion.
But Greed will fall heavily as giants do.
Fifth, Celebrations need Life at their centre,
And this is rejoicing with hearts pure and true.

Sixth is the Mountain of Family Unity,
Bleeding and tearing our children apart.
Fire of the fathers will take on this mountain
While mothers' sweet gifts set the family heart.

Last is that towering mountain, Religion,
That covers the truth with it's layer of lies.
Hear what the Spirit is telling the prophets
And see what he'll do with his wonderful spies!"

The spies of the Spirit are those who see Heaven,
Who hear and declare what the Father wants known.
THEY SAY A TSUNAMI OF HEAVEN'S LOVE IS COMING
TO WIPE OUT DECEPTION AND PLANT HEAVEN'S THRONE.