10:35 p.m.

Again the man ate too much for his own good. He could barely sit long enough in his car ride home without an involuntary bowel movement threatening to ruin the interior leather of his new convertible car. The same convertible he happened to clean earlier that day, and for the second time that week. Barley able to transition out of his car he wobbled his way to his front door and into his house away from the fascist eyes of his affluent neighbors. He plopped to the living room floor assuming the only position his body was capable of. As he lay spreadeagle on his back uncomfortable and slightly anxious he ripped his shirt off in fear of suffocation. The spinning fan above brought waves of nausea if he starred at it for too long. Rubbing his naked protruding belly seemed to be a brief fix for the brewing pain in his stomach, but then the pain turned for the worse. He felt the sidings of his stomach stretched and the food nearly about to overflow back out of his mouth. A small burp came from his abdomen and he could taste the food as it rose and steamed in the back of his throat. He questioned himself In agony, "Why?". Why would he continue to spoil the treat of dining out at his favorite restaurant in town just to come home in disgust and pain? Is it an inability to stop himself from ordering the biggest plates of food and forcing every single grain of it into his mouth? Or are the pictures that show the plates of food just too enticing for his self control? Is it that the price seems right, therefore it only seems logical to order the full plate and its copious amount of sides to choose from? Perhaps it is just because his finances allow him to and his lack of appreciation for what sparse living feels like, or even worse famine. With no real acknowledgment of the nonrefundable resources he so easily exhaust, not to mention the physical harm done to his body, he was doomed for failure. He winced as he rolled to his side. No burp could subdue the agony of each turn in his stomach. He feared at any second his dinner would decorate his luxurious new rug that he took so much pride in. So much pride it was not uncommon he would insist his guest to bend down and feel the plushness of it every time they stepped on it. Still the war raged in his abdomen. Focused on his breathing, he shut his eyes in hopes of a get away. Struggling to remain still he reassured himself to breath.

11:07 p.m.

Suddenly, like a light switch found in a dark room a life changing truth was revealed to him. One so beautifully powerful it was to change him for good. The awareness of this truth would put an end to his pain and suffering, his lies and imperfections. There was now an answer to the constant void in his stomach, his unquenched hunger, the glass half empty. No longer was he a prisoner of deception. There was an overwhelming fleeting of demons and a mountain of weight lifted. His vision was as clear and vivid as it could ever be. The bliss was not ignorance, not anymore...it was unfeigned truth. For the first time ever he could see life for what it really was. It felt like a lifetime of emotions in one moment. Simplicity surrounded him in every direction. He felt the joy of complete freedom. The weightlessness of eternal peace. He was to tell the world of this untapped truth brought to him. A new and better way to live. An actual sustainable lifestyle free of judgement.

Then without his consent, he abruptly stood up. Dazed and in a state of confusion, he glanced at the clock.

11:11 p.m.

He then looked down and saw what his life cleansing truth was. He had simply soiled himself while asleep, ruining his new living room rug.

I’m way too close to turning Thirty-Three,
It’s 1:30 in the morning and I’m seething,
I’m surrounded by friends constantly in turmoil,
But **** it if they won’t tell you they’re loyal,
Just once I’d like someone to respect my boundaries,
And not end the day on some B.S. moral quandary,
Debating if I should put someone’s needs before mine,
Because it’s driving me over the edge in my mind,

Everybody will scream “WHY AREN’T YOU HELPING ME?”
While you’re right next to them clearly drowning,
What has this world come to, when no one cares what harm their extra baggage will do,
As long as they’re getting the attention they seek, who cares about me or you?

I don’t want to get older, I haven’t done enough,
Haven’t settled down,  and found my one true love,
Unless you count ******* everything up,
But ah, ***** it some of it’s been kind of fun,
Not going to lie, I’d take back a few of the things I’ve done,
But I’d never take back who I’ve grown up to become,
I’ll end this by bragging that my Mom says I’m quite wonderful,
And as she found out far too late I’m also quite nonrefundable,

Everybody will scream “WHY AREN’T YOU HELPING ME?”
While you’re right next to them clearly drowning,
What has this world come to, when no one cares what harm their extra baggage will do,
As long as they’re getting the attention they seek, who cares about me or you?

I am in so much pain I can't feel my body
Maybe its the Brandy

When your upset, hurt, and In pain
Drinking some liquor seems to calm the brain

It starts to feel good forgetting
So why am I still fretting

Its only been a few hours why can't everything go back to being normally dysfunctional
Please except my apologies as their nonrefundable

Even if I'm right or wrong I don't care just talk to me
I won't say anything It's a guarantee

My head is gonna pop like a firecracker
I'll try and do all the patchwork

I know when I come down
I'm still going to have a frown

My body is numb
Maybe its because I've succumb

Flies on the lip of my coffee cup, dancing with their sick, fat, bodies
They're on my legs, in my hair, stuck in my imagination like gum to shoe
I can't stand to look at them, dancing in the air, landing with no care, putrid
Wipe the crap out of the corners of my eyes, out of the crevasse of my head
Empty empty empty
I somersault from the summit, crack back on every cornice
Fall where every wild thing will find me, bury me with their teeth, a proper burial
The flies will then come, even though they were not invited

A camera flashes, you smile wide
Moment to moment; life is just a ride
A common metaphor for what it's worth
You were given this nonrefundable ticket at birth
Strapped in with a buckle by your parents
The unstated rules were quite self-evident
Sometimes you get filled with exhilaration in anticipation
But then it doesn't always meet all of your expectations
It can even break down during the hardest ordeals
So you learn patience sitting on top of this rickety Ferris Wheel
Fear settles in as you pray it doesn't all crash down
The courage to hold on is something to be found
As this old ride slows to a screeching halt
You feel a sense of despair at the thought
But a waste it does become to live with this worry
Life is just a ride, and the amusement park has plenty

I brought a ticket to come and see you
Today. When I looked at the print,
I realized that it was a one-way,
With a layover in your thoughts.
Truth be told, I didn’t mind at all.
The tickets for all the other flights
Were weeks, even months out,
I paid more because I really wanted
to get there.
The ticket being nonrefundable
Made the trip that much enjoyable
Despite popular belief.
I didn’t go too much on the reviews.
Very rarely do you see one that tells
The entire truth, there is always something
Wrong. Whether it’s the seat, someone telling you
don’t drink the water, or the towels.
It’s always the towels or the sheets, for some
Odd reason.
I don’t mind a bit of turbulence.
When I got on the plane, I noticed that it wasn’t
as clean as I expected,
But it was cool. It wasn’t something
To just get upset and cancel the whole trip over.
Judging by the reviews, it’s easy to forget
That were all human. Sometimes things happen.
I leaned back in my seat and remembered that I had
Forgotten something.
I unclicked my seat belt and checked my pockets.
Nothing.
Although I am sure that I’ll arrive safely,
I’ll replace the kiss that you gave me
The last time I saw you, soon as I step off
The plane with a new one from you

What form of regret comes?

After a time, that was yours, for the victory

You failed to take it…..

Gaining back moments and lost time

Seemingly nonrefundable from history.

However, you gain desperation as a weight

trying to gamble your last few remaining

Hourglass chips on a hunch

Of what a moment shall win you

Sometimes losses wound an ego until such needs a crutch.

You look towards the sun

Wondering where all of your lost days have gone

You lost the game spending time planning your move

Now…it is you who must relearn life’s game

and relearn how to live each sand grain of the hourglass

and regain your Dance of Life … it’s miraculous Groove